A Thousand Years
by kellbells
Summary: Jacob has an imprint in New Moon they're friends and had one night. Tragedy strikes deep now, Jake has to make a choice. His imprint or the girl he loves deeply. Kassie has to struggle watching the man she's loved for so long be with another girl. There is someone to pick up the pieces with her. Will they be the imprint that doesn't end up in love? or will he have change of heart?
1. Wham!

**Wham! **

I walk out of an alley in Port Angeles. My shoes are dangling in my hand, my white dress once perfect now wrinkled. I don't even the notice or care about the looks I'm getting. My eyes are too glazed over and my mind in a deep haze.

Before I realize it I'm at my car unlocking the doors. Before I get in I throw my purse to the passenger side before sliding in and immediately start the car. The fleeting thought that maybe I shouldn't be driving, but I don't care I just want to leave. I pull my car onto the road ready to get out of the retched place, leave it behind.

I head in the direction of La Push. _Home. _I know I need to stop in Forks so I can go to the hospital. I don't even remember arriving but I pull into the parking lot of the hospital looking for any space. I find one that's a bit far but I just shut off my car staring at the entrance. I finally get out of the car only grabbing my purse not even thinking about my shoes. I enter the hospital Emergency Room and go straight to the desk. The receptionist looks up at me immediately with a warm smile.

"_Hi, how can I help you today?_" her welcoming smile still there. I wish it would go away.

_"I've just been raped."_ my voice is just a breathy whisper. I'm not even sure if I even said it out loud.

The receptionist immediately wipes the smile off her face and calls for a nurse to take me to a room. The nurse leads me to a white room, its cold. _Not a very welcoming feeling place._ I usually don't like hospitals but my mind is too blank to care. The nurse tries to ask me what happened; I just look at her, with a look that says leave it. I'm ordered to lie in the hospital bed while they take a few tests.

It feels like years that I'm just lying there staring at the white walls. I hear a noise at the door; I look over and see Charlie Swan, Chief of Police in Forks, Washington. Figures they would call police, they have too. I look at him; he looks awkward and sympathetic. He has brown hair and brown eyes. _I wonder if Bella takes after her dad. _After that thought I shake my head knowing I can't think about that right now.

"_Kassandra Sage?"_

"_Yes." _

Chief Swan makes a soft coughing sound, and I know he's ready to start questioning. He shuffles for a minute, obviously trying to figure out how to start. _Has he ever had to deal with a rape before? Forks is so welcoming. _

_"Miss. Sage I would like to ask you a few questions"_

"_Okay"_

"_Where did the incident take place?"_

_"An alley in Port Angles"_

"_Around what time would you say this happened?"_

"_I don't know maybe an hour or so ago." _

"_Do you remember what the man looked like?_

I bite my lip, and look away I really don't want to think about it. I figure if I don't answer he'll leave.

_"Mam? Is there anything you can tell me about the man?"_

_"No. Now please leave."_

_"Miss sage-"_

_"I'm done answering questions. Please leave."_ I look up at him with pleading eyes. I watch him stand there, having a war in his head. His lips are thinned and his forehead is turned into a frown.

_"Okay. If you would please stop by the station sooner or later so we can have a follow up?"_

I just nod, turning my gaze back to the white wall in front of me. I hear the door shut and I tilt my head back finally deciding to look at the ceiling now, I sit there waiting and counting the markings on the ceiling, though I'm really paying attention to numbers. _This is why I hate hospitals; they make time feel never ending._

I'm brought out of my thoughts by the door opening as a Doctor walks inside. He's pale, blond hair but his eyes are golden. I know immediately this must be Dr. Carlisle Cullen. I watch as he closes the door behind him for privacy.

_"Miss. Sage, I am here to discuss your results_" he has the kindest voice.

"_Okay"_

"_My name is Dr-"_

"_Carlisle Cullen adoptive father of the Cullen vampire clan." _

"_That's correct. I see the La Push pack has told you everything" _

I look at him curiously for a second.

"_Their smell is all over you" _His voice isn't mean or judgmental, he's merely stating a fact.

I let my gaze shift to my hands in lying in my lap. I take notice that my hands are pale enough to rival his skin. I hear Dr. Cullen take a breath.

"_Miss. Sage, your results say that everything is okay, there is some bruising on your legs, and I would expect you to be sore for a while. There was some tearing but nothing to serious. Luckily it won't need stitches. However there is something that you should know."_

I look up at him, his voice is now full of sadness, and his eyes hold a look of concern and pain.

"_Miss. Sage, were you aware that you were 12 weeks pregnant?"_

My eyes widen and my hand immediately goes to my stomach. My action doesn't go unnoticed by him. He lets his eyes close for a moment as if remembering something. It's not too long before he opens them back up. _No smile. _

_"I'm very sorry but due to the brutality of the rape, you've had a miscarriage_." He's looking into my eyes, gaging how I'm going to take this. My eyes immediately fill with tears and I cover my face with my hands. I feel as if the world has stopped around me. Dr. Cullen comes closer to my bed and I shield away from him. I can feel his sorrowful gaze on me.

_"Miss. Sage, I know this is hard to take. I would just like to let you know that if you feel the need to talk to someone-" _He doesn't finish the sentence. _Maybe he feels awkward offering a wolf girl a shoulder to cry on. Sam's right he is very kind, maybe just maybe not all leeches are bad. _

I just nod my head, letting him know I heard him and I understand. I can tell he would like to say more but I don't want him to. I just start shaking my head, hoping he gets that I don't want to hear anything else.

_"I am terribly sorry for your loss. Would you like me to call anyone? It says in your file you are living with Sam Uley."_ He stands there waiting for an answer.

"_No but thank you. I'm allowed to go right?"_

"_Yes you are. Are you sure you'll be okay to drive?"_

"_Yes I'll be fine. Thank you."_

Once Dr. Cullen leaves I sit in the bed for a little longer thinking. I can't help but blame myself. If I had been smart enough to wait for **him **to take me, this would never have happened. If I hadn't been blinded by hurt and anger that he would ditch me once again, with no call not even a text. My tears are still flowing down my face. I can only hear the sounds of my sobbing. My petite body is shaking. I don't even hear the sound of my ringtone going off multiple times. _It's all my fault. It's all my fault. I'm so sorry my baby. I'm so so sorry. _

When I finally pull myself together, I decided I should probably check myself out and head home. I see my clothes lying on the chair in the corner of the room. I push the covers off of me and swing my legs off the bed. I sit there for a minute letting my hands grip the edge of the bed, biting my lip begging myself hard to stop the tears. I slowly pull myself so I'm standing up. I walk over to the door to lock it before heading to the chair to gather my white wrinkled dress. It's painful to move as I take off the hospital gown and put on my dress. I can see the bruising on my thighs, and I do feel very sore down well there.

I see my purse on the chair as well and go to pick it up looking for my phone. I glance at the screen 10 missed calls. I flip open my phone. _Emily. Emily. Home. Home. Kim. Kim. Kim. Jared. Paul. Paul again_. I know they are all probably freaking out_. Sam probably sent out a search party_.

I felt tears sting my eyes there is still nothing from **him**, nothing. Gosh, is he even at Sam and Emily's? If so why is there nothing from him? _The one person I want to call. _

I snap my phone shut and throw it back into my purse while shaking my head trying to rid the thoughts that will make everything worse than it already is. I walk out of the room and down the hall to the receptionist desk. I let her know I want to check myself out. I fill out the forms and leave. Today I had woken up with a smile on my face an than wham!

* * *

><p><em>So for a first chapter what do you think? <em>

_For those who have read this already I didn't really change this one but other chapters have been changed! I hope you enjoy the changes. _

_FYI NOT A JACOB/BELLA ENDING! I'm sticking to mostly what the Stephanie Myer created. _

_Thank you all for reading!_

_Feedback is always welcome (:_

_I don't own Twilight!_

_xoxo_


	2. Blunt

**Blunt. **

I reach my car, a green Chrysler Lebaron with a beige top, it's a convertible. Before my dad died, almost two years now, we use to watch Veronica Mars together. I always told him I loved her car and I wanted one. So when I turned 14 he went and got me a green Chrysler Lebaron with a beige top, just like hers. Of course I couldn't drive it so my dad said he would work on it till my 16th birthday. Daddy promised he would be the first to go for a ride with me; that never happened.

My dad died in a motorcycle accident, the roads had been too wet, from the rain we had all week and he skidded out of control. Ever since then I've refused get on a motorcycle. He died the night before my 15th birthday. My mom left me, she couldn't handle being around a constant reminder of the man she loved and lost. I don't know where she is right now; I expect to never see her again. Before she left at least she had the decency to as a family friend to take me in. Sam Uley and his fiancé took me in; Sam's dad and my dad were the best of friends. I couldn't be happier than I am living with them they took me in and helped me through so much.

I see the Welcome to La Push sign knowing I'll be home in just 5 minutes. The sun is gone and the stars have taken its place. I notice there is no rain tonight, it's foggy instead. When I pull into the gravel drive way I know the people inside can hear my arrival. I sit in the car for a few minutes longer, trying to figure out a plan on how to handle the situation.

I guess I sat in the car for too long, because I watched has the front door was roughly pulled open and the towering figure of Sam is in the doorway. I sigh and open my door I can see some of the pack in the windows, all their heads are turned towards the window. As I start walking Sam stays on the porch with his arms crossed so I know he's not only worried but he's pissed.

"_Kassandra Jolene Sage! Where the hell have you been? Do you know how worried we have been? You are way past curfew! No call or text, no answering your phone. Never do this again do you hear me? And where the hell is Jacob, wasn't he supposed to be with you?"_ His voice is panicked, and angry.

I just look at him. The tears that I had kept at bay till now are streaking down my face, evident to Sam in the light of the porch. Sam's eyes widen and a frown comes over his face. I stop before him hoping he'll realize that it's not something I want to discuss with him._ No questions, just move out of my way_. No luck.

_"Kassandra. What- what's wrong?"_

I hear no noise in the background, I know they are listening. I don't like it, it feels suffocating.

_Ugh fuck this. _ I push my way around him and through the door. I see the boys in the living room, Embry, Quil, Jared, Kim and Paul. He's at not here I can't tell if that makes me happy or sad. _He's with Billy he has to be. _

I see their faces all looking confused and alarmed. Its Paul's face that sticks out though he looks mostly concerned than other emotions. _Oh God he knows, he knows_. I love that boy the most, he understands me the best. We are complete opposites but we get along perfectly. Sometimes I wish it was him who imprinted on me._ Sometimes_.

Out of the corner of my eye I notice Emily, my second mother, come to stand in the door way of the kitchen and living room. Her beautiful face is turned into a frown. I shake my head letting my eyes fall to the ground and fly to the stairs heading up to my room. I can hear someone shout my name but I keep running. I slam the door shut, even though I know that's Sam's biggest pet peeve. _Who cares right now!_

I take off my dress while heading to my closet to change into sweats and a cami. Once done I grab my dress from where I dropped it on the floor and throw it in the trash. I climb into bed, sitting against the head board. I hear my door creek; I know its Emily and Kim so I look over at them. They both come sit on the bed. Emily is next to me and Kim in front of me, Emily wraps her arms around me so I rest my head on her shoulder.

"_What happened?"_ Her voice is soft, and caring. I don't answer I don't think I can yet.

_"Is it Jake? Did he do something?"_ I shake my head. _No it's not him,_ _but it'd be so much easier if it was._ _Well some of it is. _

_"Kassie? What's wrong? Can you tell us?_" Kim's voice holds panic and kindness. I want to tell them, my mouth opens and closes, but nothing comes out. _Okay find a way to do this without talking then. _

I look around the room my eyes landing on my mahogany colored desk. I get out of bed and make my way over grabbing my notebook and I flip it open to a blank page. I look on the desk top again and search for my purple pen. I decide to sit down at my desk and write what I want to say. My eyes notice my walls, my white walls. _That's going to have to change soon_.

"_Kassie, hunny? What-" _As Emily talks, I can hear both women shift on the bed as if to start moving over to me. So I hold up my hand in a wait a minute gesture, without even looking at them.

_There is only one way I can go about this and that's to be blunt_. So I start to write what happened in my note book.

-"I went to Port Angeles today, I was supposed to go with Jacob but he never showed. I was so mad I tried to call but he didn't answer, so I left. Once I got there I parked close to a short cut I know, as I was walking into the alley a man grabbed my arm and put a hand over my mouth. I tried to scream but he gripped my arm really hard and told me to shut it or he'd hurt me even worse. He pulled us further into the darkness of the alley before shoving me against the wall. With one had over my mouth and the other one moving I tried to shove him but he pushed his body against mine. He was so strong, I watched him reach into his pocket and pull out a knife. He smiled at me before lifting up my dress….he raped me. It hurt so much I could feel all the blood. When he finished he ran, and I sat there before making my way to my car. With all the blood I knew I needed a hospital, so I went to Forks. They did tests I have bruising on my upper thighs and a slight tear….. The doctor then proceeded to tell me that I had been 12 weeks pregnant, and the rape caused a miscarriage. I lost my innocent baby."

A waterfall of tears are falling down my face I can taste the salty water on my lips. I can also see that the paper has tear dots. I pick up the notebook and make my way over to the bed. I scoot over back to where and but lean against the wall next to the window. I give the notebook to Emily and I look at Kim letting her know its okay for her to read too. Kim moves off the bed to kneel on the other side of Emily.

I look around my room not wanting to see their reactions. As I look around the room I can't help but have visuals of me walking around the room, holding a baby and singing to my baby. I can see the crib its mahogany just like rest of my furniture. The vision is too painful so I close my eyes and open them once I turn to look out the window. I try to focus on listening to see if I can hear the boys downstairs. I can't hear words but I hear mumbling so I know they are talking.

I feel the bed shift and I feel Emily wrap her arms around me before once again resting my head on her shoulder. I start letting sobs and whimpers come out of my mouth. Not hiding any more, Emily runs her hands through my hair. While Kim tries to sit on the other side of my but since I'm against the wall she's somewhat in front of me. She starts rubbing my arm up while her other hand reaches down to grab my hand. I can see tears in her eyes and I can feel Emily taking shaky breaths so I know she has tears as well.

We sit like that for a long time, I don't know how much time before I can hear Emily break the silence but her voice is just a soft whisper. I wonder if she's trying to speak low enough so the wolf ears downstairs don't hear anything.

"_I'm so sorry hunny. I'm so sorry." _I just nod against her my tears aren't as heavy now though.

"_Who was the father?" _I get quiet at Kim's question and I can feel Emily shake her head.

"_Sorry wrong time to ask that. I'm sorry it just slipped." _I know Kim is really sorry so I give her a smile.

"_Jacob was. It happened once, it was nothing planned. He never mentioned it again so neither did I."_

_"Did you know? I mean I never saw you get sick or anything." _I'm actually surprised at how stable my voice is right now.

_"No, I had absolutely no idea. My period has always been irregular." I wish I did though, and then maybe I would have been more cautious about going somewhere by myself. Maybe this could have been prevented._

_"Are you hungry? I'm going to whip something up okay sweetie._" Emily's changing the subject weather for me or for her and Kim I don't know. _Knowing Emily it's all three of us. _

I can feel the bed shift and I watch her walk to the door. She turns to look at me before she goes downstairs and I can see the promise in her eyes that she won't mention anything downstairs. I hear Kim sniffle and I look over at her she's wiping her tears but they aren't stopping. I force a smile at her and she does the same. She knows this is going to very hard on me and she's scared too.

"_Kassie, I know you don't want to talk about it and I won't ask you to. I want you to know that you are my best friend pretty much my sister. Emily and I will be here for you, so will the pack. We are all going to be with you through every step of the way. Just know that for whenever you're ready_" I throw my arms around my best friend. _My sister_.

_"Thank you Kimmie._" I can feel words building up in my mouth and know I can't stop them.

"_I love him you know, so much. He knows I love him but he's set it straight that nothing will be happening in the near future. It's just I thought after our night that he was showing some feelings for me. I should know better it's never going to be me in HER position. And it fucking kills me inside. I'm his imprint and he doesn't even seem to fucking care."_

"_I know I'm so sorry. Everyone thinks that Jake is really stupid by the way. I can't even imagine how it feels._"

I can hear voices raise downstairs so I know the boys are asking Emily questions. I can hear her in the kitchen its right below my room.

"_Kim, have all of you eaten?"_

Kim gives a shake of her head no.

_"Can you go tell Emily make sure she makes dinner for the boys too; we all know they'd starve."_ I try to laugh but it's so forced I can tell she knows. All she does though is give me a smile nodding her head.

_"Of course. I'm also going to tell Jared that I'm gonna spend the night here okay? I'll be right back."_

"_No go ahead and spend some time with Jared I wanna be alone for a bit."_

"_I'm not going to leave you-"_

"_Kim please."_

"_..alright"_

After she leaves I look over to my purse reaching for it once I spotted it. I look through my purse for my phone but just as I go to grab it I can't help but think to I even want to know? I know it's not likely that he called but maybe a text. _Would that make me feel better though? NO._ I put the phone face down on my night stand. I don't plan on looking at it for the rest of the night.

I get out of bed heading to my closet to open the door. I look at the full length mirror that hangs on the inside of the door. My naturally curly auburn hair falls at a rest on the middle of my back. My pale skin standing out I wish I'd tan but it's never sunny here. I look at my body I took after grandmother on that part 5'2. I'm not one to work out a lot but I have a pretty toned body that fits well with my height. My eyes stand out the most thought, even if they are so empty right now. They seem to be a dark brown, but if I look closely I can still see the sea green that I love._ My dad's eyes._

Against my better judgment I can't help but turn to the side imagining a baby bump, I can imagine how much I would be glowing right now. I'm broken out of my staring by what sounds like a yell but is just normal talking voice. _Well for the boys it's normal. _I turn my head to look at the door that's partially cracked.

_"Come on! Tell me what happened? Is she okay? What the fuck is going on?"_ That would be Paul.

"_Did something happen with Jake? He was supposed to take her to Port Angeles, but then he's not with her when she gets back. " _Jared

"_I stopped by his house to pick something up from Billy but I saw Bella's truck and decided to leave without interrupting."_ Well there goes my idea of him taking care of Billy. _Way to go Quil_.

"_What?! It makes no sense I mean last night during patrol he told me he was going to take Kassie to Port Angeles today. I don't understand"_ _Sweet, sweet Embry_

"_So what? Did he just fucking ditch her like he does with every other time?" _ I knew it; Paul might get out of control.

_"Why is he fighting the imprint? Why is he throwing everything away?"_ Kim. _Oh come on Kim don't get involved in this. _

_"I wouldn't say he's fighting it. Jacob has accepted that he imprinted on Kassie but because he is so in love with Bella, especially before phasing. His imprint feelings with Kassie are dormant._" Sam, _oh wise one. _

"_Alright that's it. This is none of our business- and yes Paul you too, this is between Jacob and Kassie. You all need to just drop it. Do you hear me? Drop it. As for what happened today she'll tell you when ready. Got it. Now no more right now." _I close my eyes. _Thank you Emily. _

I hear the front door open, so I open my eyes trying to figure out if I can guess who just left. _Most likely Paul, poor guy his temper always gets the best of him. _

However I'm shocked when I hear a voice make a greeting.

"_Hey guys! Dinner almost ready? I brought along Bella so you can all finally meet her!"_

It gets quiet downstairs. _Oh Jacob…_

* * *

><p><em>Hey Everyone!<br>_

_Hope you enjoyed this chapter._

_Thanks for all the reviews, favorites and follows. It really helps keep me going, so always feel free to leave feedback!_

**_I don't own anything related to Twilight that would be for Stephanie Myer_**

_xoxo_


	3. Uh Oh

_**Uh oh.**_

Jacobs POV.

Pausing my work on the rabbit in the garage, I glance at my cell phone screen 8:45AM. It's still pretty early I don't have to get Kassie till 10:15AM. Kassie wants to go get some new books so I promised I'd go with her, I feel a little guilty I haven't spent much time with her lately. _Well you should feel guilty she is your imprint….Oh well she understands she knows about Bella….so what she's still your imprint. _

After patrol I couldn't get any sleep last night, I was just so anxious last night. It was like I could something really good or really bad was going to happen soon. _You're a shape shifter now, get use to a not so boring life. _

I continue to clinker around with the rabbit for about 30 more minutes, its 9:15AM now. _Alright done for the day, go inside clean up this mess and then head over to pick up Kas- _

My thoughts are interrupted by the sound of tires in the drive way and I hear the familiar sound of an old engine. _BELLA!_ I rush outside to greet her with a warm smile. When she gets out of the car, I run up and gather her in my arms swinging her around. Her laugh is there but it sounds like there is emptiness behind it. I set her down and get a look at her, her cheeks start to develop a beautiful blush. _I love when she blushes, there's nothing better….Well Kassie has a blush all the time… Shut up it's different with Bella, its special. _

_"Hey ya Bells! What's up? Longtime no see." _I try to keep the smile off my face but I can't help the excitement in my voice.

_"Hey Jake, sorry about not being around more often. A lot happened. Anyways I was actually wondering if you could actually help me fix up these two motorcycles I picked up from the junk yard? _"

"_Really? No way let's see 'em."_ We walk around to the back up her truck and there in the bed are two pretty beaten up motorcycles.

_"WOW Bells. Who knew you would be into the dangerous stuff. Haha"_

"_Yea I decided to try something new, ya know? So can you help? You're the best mechanic I know and I thought it'd be great to spend time together."_

_"That's cool. You have to promise you won't back out though. You really gotta ride them once they get fixed up."_

_"I promise. I never understood why most girls are so afraid of them, they look like they could be an adrenaline rush."_

"_Yea I know girls have an automatic fear of them, but there's nothing to fear. So yea I agree it's pretty pointless."_

I know about Kassie's dad, how he died in a motorcycle accident but the roads were wet. I know its mean to say it's a pointless fear, because Kassie is now terrified of them. Seriously every time in the car if she sees a bike she immediately tenses up. _There's a difference though the roads were wet and caused the bike to lose control, not the bikes itself, it's different._ _Right?_

"_So I was wondering… um could we start now? That is if you don't have any plans already."_

She biting her lip and there's that blush again. Her doe eyed brown eyes are looking up at me with complete hopefulness.

_"Yea no I have nothing important planned today." _Okay so Kassie is important, but this changes things. _I'll text her and she'll understand_.

_"Okay, Great! So um do you have a ramp that will help get the bikes out_?" She looks confused as if she didn't really think this part through.

"_Oh no Bells don't worry! I got 'em'."_

I take one bike and lift it out of the bed setting it down right next to the truck. I do the same with the other one. I glance over at Bella her eyes are wide with amazement. Having werewolf strength does come in handy when trying to impress a girl.

_"WOW Jake. What happened have you been working out lately_?" She lets out a small laugh.

_"No not really, just had a growth spurt." _I hate to lie to her about this. It would be so much easier if she knew about the pack. I mean she knows about the leeches so I don't get why I can't tell her. _Oh that's right she's not my imprint and we have that stupid rule. _

Bella and I each take hold of a bike and start to roll them to the shed.

_"Hey Bella!" _

Bella and I stop turning our heads face my small house. My dad's waving at her with a half-smile on his face. He's sitting in his wheel chair in the doorway. I meet his eyes briefly and I can see disappointment flash on his face before he looks away.

_"Hey Billy."_ Bella waves back awkwardly.

"_We're going to work on these bikes Bella found in the junk yard. So we'll be in the shed if you need us." _I tell my dad flashing him a smile, giving him a thumbs up. However my smile fades when he doesn't even look in my direction just rolls back into the house before shutting the door. _Huh?_

Bella looks at me a little worried, she's probably wondering if she did something wrong. I know it's not her so I just shrug my shoulders, and continue walking.

Once we reach the inside of the shed we park the bikes in front of the Rabbit. I point to the stool work desk that is just under the window, I nailed the wood into the wall myself actually. _Kassie usually sits in that spot she loves to have a view of the woods._ _Oh right Kassie have to text her. _

But when Bella grabs a crate and sits next to me. I have to say I'm a little stunned that she's sitting so close but also so very happy. I smile at her and ask if she want's anything to drink or eat. She just shakes her head saying she's okay for now.

I head over to the work desk and pick up my cell phone flipping it open to text Kassie. _9:45 well at least I'm giving her a heads up. _I go to my inbox messages to hit Kassie's name, I smile seeing that the last thing she texted was a smiley face, but just as I'm about to start typing Bella's voice distracts me and I flip my phone shut. I turn off my phone before turning around to head back over to where Bella is sitting by the bikes. _I'll apologize to Kass later. She'll understand, she always does. _

_"So Jake, is see you are still working on the Rabbit."_

_"Yeah I'm almost done, it's looking pretty good. If I do say so_ myself" I shoot her a cocky smirk, I grab the tool box and start looking through it. She gets up to take a walk around the Rabbit before coming back to sit on the crate.

_"Yea it is. So what's been new with you?" _She gives me a small smile.

_"Nothing much really, life's pretty much the same in La Push." _I make sure to try my best to make it sound like I'm not hiding something. _Oh and the fact that I'm now a werewolf, whose job is to protect my tribe from those leeches you hang out with._

_"Oh, that's cool I guess. How are your friends?"_ She starts playing with her hands in her lap.

_" Embry and Quil being dorks as usual but they're good. Kassie is still her happy go lucky self. What' bout you? How's everything in Bella's world?"_

"_It's okay I guess….. um Edward left, well his whole family left town."_ Her voice is full of sadness it's almost painful to hear. _I know they left you, Sam found you in the woods lying on the ground freezing. _

_"Any man who'd break up with you is insane_!" _I'd never break up with you. _I don't say I'm sorry because I'm not.

_"Thanks Jake. It's been hard but I'm taking one day at a time I guess"_

We continue to talk and just hang out in the shed. Ditching Kassie is long forgotten, the sadness Bella carried with her seems to dim and we end up having a great time.

That Anxious feeling is still in my stomach. I think it's still there because Bella's here. _I guess last night's anxiousness meant it's going to be good_. I start to show her stuff about fixing the bike too, she seems interested it makes my heart skip every time I see her smile about something she learned. I'm glad she's back.

"_I'm kind of thirsty. Is it okay if I go inside to get something for us to drink?"_

_"Sure, Sure. Go ahead."_ I watch her leave the shed and I know I a lopsided grin is probably on my face. I'm just so happy right now

I decide to take advantage of the fact that she's away so I can call Kassie and talk to her. I can't help but notice how late it is, it's close to sunset. Time really does fly by, when having a good time. _Shit she's going be so pissed I texted this late. _

I pick up my phone again and take quick glance at the wood. I think I see something blur through the trees but I don't smell the disgustingly sweet smell so I guess it's one of my pack brothers. But then it happens…

I get this feeling in the pit of my stomach, it's not the anxious feeling. No this is way worse; it's as if something is being taken from inside of me. I can't help but double over grabbing my stomach with one arm and leaning the other on the work desk. I take deep breaths trying to control it. Just as it starts to subside, I feel utter despair wash over me. It starts from the heart and spreads through my entire body. _ What the fuck is going on? _I continue to take deep breaths I really just want to cry, but I'm not going to so I clench my teeth and close my eyes.

_"JAKE! Are you okay?"_ My head snaps in the direction of Bella's voice.

"_Sure, Sure. Just a little cramp from sitting too long I guess."_ I decide to push what happened to the back of my mind, but make a note to bring it up later with Sam.

_"Are you sure?" _I can hear the panic in her voice. I don't want there to be any panic in her voice. Ever.

_" I'm good. So listen I just noticed how late it is and my friend Sam's fiancée is cooking dinner for me and my friends tonight around 8. I was wondering if you would wanna go?"_ _Please say yes. Please say yes._

_"Yea that'd be cool. You sure it's okay if I come? You don't want to call?"_

"_Oh no it's totally fine. Emily is the nicest person you'll ever meet. Plus I'm sure everyone will want to meet you. Embry will be there and Quil to. Oh and you might even finally meet Kassie!" _I'm so excited she said yes.

"_Alright….Wait the same Sam you don't like? I thought you like despised him and his 'cult'._"

_"I was wrong about him. They aren't a cult, just really good friends. He's like a mentor to me now." He is also my alpha._

"Oh, well that's cool I guess."

We continue to talk back in forth until it's completely dark outside. I glance at the clock 8:00Pm.

"_So you ready to head over? Do you mind if we take your car. I would drive but the rabbit isn't ready yet."_ I stumble over my words, embarrassed that she has to drive me.

_"Yeah_, o_f course."_

We head out of the shed. I don't bother saying bye to my dad; he knows where I'm going. _Plus with how he acted earlier I'm not sure I want to face him._

When we get to the car and start driving she keeps the radio off and we sit in a comfortable silence. _I really just wanna take her hand, but not yet I have to wait._

I finally see the turn to Sam and Emily's, so I tell her to pull in. The gravel is loud but I'm sure her engine is what they hear instead. We both get out of the car and start walking toward the house. I see Kassie's car in the front along with Emily's. _Figures none of the guys would drive. At least Kassie is here. I can apologize to her in person the right way. Finally Bella and Kassie can meet, maybe they'll become friends so I can hang with them both. _

"_Are we early? There aren't a lot of cars here."_

"_Nah everyone probably…walked it's a small area."_

I notice that when we're walking as the voices of the guys get louder, Bella gets closer to my side and steps a little bit behind me. _It's like I'm her personal shield, her knight in shining armor_.

I open the door letting Bella go first, but once I'm inside as well she goes right back to her position at my side again. I let out a smile, I hear everyone in the kitchen and I catch the ending of Emily talking.

"_- tell us when ready. Got it."_ _She's pissed. Shit what did the guys do? _I decide to cut in before anyone can say anything that they wouldn't want Bella to hear.

_"Hey Guys! Dinner almost ready? I brought Bella along so you can all finally meet her." _And then it's quiet, dead quiet_. Uh oh. _

* * *

><p><em> How did I do writing in Jacobs POV?<br>_

_Hope you enjoyed reading!_

_Feedback is always welcome! _

_Thank you to everyone who has been reading and favoring and following and commenting!_

_ I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT_

_xoxo_


	4. Scatter Brain

_**Scatter brain**_

It was like pouring salt on a wound, a very open new one. I stood there my hand is now covering my mouth, my eyes haven't moved from the door. Questions are running through my head, I continue looking at the door, as if it'll give answers. _Oh great. Now you're thinking about talking doors. Well isn't this just peachy._

I decide to listen to see what else is going to happen. _Will they welcome her with open arms? Oh God. Do I go down there? Should I stay up here?_ _Oh don't start crying again. _

I decide that since I'm crying by just hearing that she's here with him I'm going to stay up in my room. I walk back to my bed and decide to crawl all the way under the covers. _If I can't see them, they can't see me_. As much as I don't want to I'm still straining to hear what's being said by the pack. Nothing.

"_Hello Bella, it's nice to finally meet you. I'm Emily, this is my fiancée Sam. Over there is Paul, Jared, Kim and I'm sure you've already met Embry and Quil._"

Emily is too good of a person and hostess to be unwelcoming but I can hear in her voice that there is a strain. I can hear the rest of the pack say the pleasantries, well except Paul but that's a given.

"_Hello. Thanks for letting me tag along." _Bella's voice is soft. _Like a timid mouse_ _knowing it's about be eaten by a- _ _no Kassandra dammit be nice._

"_Yes of course. I just started cooking, so we're a bit behind schedule. Would you like anything to drink?_"

"_Oh um yea, water would be great."_

"_Of course, why don't you all go to the living room until dinners ready?_"

Their footsteps make the wood floors creak. I shift around in my bed so I'm lying on my back now, to stare at the ceiling. I don't wanna be a hermit and stay up here but I also don't want to go downstairs and face Jacob_. Not yet, and if I have my way hopefully later than sooner, much later._

"_Hey where's Kassie? I saw her car out front, why isn't she down here joining the party?"_

_Okay maybe it will be sooner_. With that thought I roll my eyes and shift on the bed again, now I'm on my stomach and my head is buried underneath my pillow. _Fall asleep. Fall asleep. Close your eyes and fall asleep …...Nothing, son of a gun._

"_She's upstairs apparently she went to Port Angeles today. Which I thought you knew about. I'm sure you know Port Angeles and driving are both exhausting, so she went to take a nap. I think its best we leave her alone_." I can hear the acid in Sam's voice, clear as day. His voice also has finality so he's setting commands.

"_So Bella, you moved here last year right? How you liking Forks?"_

Yes! I'm safe. I uncurl myself from the bed and slowly get out. Instead of my right foot making contact with the floor it hits the notebook. I bend down, quickly rip out the paper I wrote on, I rip it as many times as I can and just toss them in the trash. _No one will be seeing that anytime soon._

I place the notebook back on my desk and take a seat. I grab my IPod from where it's charging and place the head phones in my ear and press play. The first song up is "What Hurts the Most" by Rascal Flats_. How fitting. _I go to skip the song but change my mind. Right now I need to listen to sad music, I need something to help. I open my drawer again put my hand all the way to the back when I feel the leather material of my diary. _I can write in this instead, get all my scatter brain thoughts out. _ _READY SET GO!_

Today I was raped. Then when I went to the hospital I was pregnant but I had a miscarriage. Who would the baby of looked like? Me, Jacob, or maybe a perfect mix. Would that have changed my relationship with Jacob? Would I have been half of a single mother? Why does he love her? I mean he knows she was involved with that vampire. What was his name? Edward? I don't know. Don't care. I feel so angry right now at myself for being so stupid. I mean come on everyone knows you don't go down the alley, it always means trouble. I was stupid to take a short cut. I'm angry that I didn't stay home and decide to wait for Jacob. I'm angry that I had to go by myself. I'm angry that I can't remember anything about the man from the alley. I'm angry that the man who imprinted on me and I expect to love me unconditionally is in love with someone else. I hate that my parents are gone. But what I hate the most, is that MY baby is gone. I could have been a mother. I know I'm seventeen but I'm more mature than most other teens. How can I love someone so much never meeting them? I can't because and chance had of holding them is gone, he was taken away from me. Why did this happen to me?. This is all my fault I lost my baby, it's my fault he was taken away. Nothing hurts more than knowing my baby, my son, was ripped away from me. I'm so sorry baby, I didn't know about you till after I lost you but I love you so much and I'm so sorry.

_Stop. _

My heart is breaking, usually when I write I feel better but this is making it worse. My heart is just broken, my thoughts feel tight like I'm suffocating but I'm not. I lift my hand to wipe my tears that are just flooding down my face again. I take 10 deep breaths to bring myself back to the world, that's not my in my head. I close my diary and put it back to where it was. I know it's not a great hiding place but I don't expect people to invade my personal privacy.

I look around my room searching for something to do; I spot the shelf where all my books are_. Perfect!_ I go over to the shelf and sit crisscross apple sauce looking up at it. It's not till now that I see how messy it is, so I start bringing down the first shelf of books spreading them out on the floor. I decide to put them in alphabetical order. I continue bringing down the books, and soon I start making piles.

I'm there for a while just sitting till I get the feeling that I have to pee. I get up from where I'm sitting and take the headphones out of my ears and toss the IPod on my bed. I know they can all hear me moving around the floors creek. However I know I'm in the clear of having no one come upstairs, Sam covered that for me. I open my door as silently as I can and look down the hall to the bathroom. _Well shit now they will hear me. Unless I work some magic and get there silently_. _You got this Kassandra._ I put one foot on the floor and squeeze my eyes shut before shifting my pressure to that foot. _Please oh please don't make a noise_.

_SUCCESS!_ Once I got that first floor board down it was easy to keep quiet the rest of the way. I one time stayed home and when Emily was out I found all the quiet floor boards and mad a path to the door.I let out a little giggle because I feel like I just pulled a 007 stunt. Once I do my business I go to flush my toilet and that's when I realize that my 007 stunt was pointless since now they'll hear the flush. After washing my hands I open the door I go back down the hallway still doing the 007 stunt anyways. When I get to my door I'm surprised to see I have a visitor. Luckily for me it's just Kim. _How the hell did she get up here without me noticing? _

"_Hey hun I brought up some water and Ibuprofen for you_."

"_Thanks. I do have a headache." _

I go over to sit on the bed against the headboard while Kim sits against the wall. Our legs form a cross. It's silent for a bit I don't have anything to say. I take the pill out of her hand and dry sallow it. I then reach over to grab the water on the nightstand and take a big gulp.

"_Emily is almost done with the food." _

"_Okay." _

We look at each other I can see the pain and I see the sympathy in her eyes. I want to know what she's thinking. Finally I just decide to ask her the question that's been on my mind.

"_Sooo is she pret-"_My words get cut off when I hear Jacob speak louder than he needs too. _Obviously he wants Kim and I to get the message. _

"_Now that we know Kassie's awake. Someone go get the two girls, their girl talk isn't as important as coming down to have fun with us dudes!" _I can hear the slight humor in his voice. _Oh he thinks he's so clever._ I narrow my eyes at this thought.

Who knew that his clever little statement was going to set off the ticking time bomb we all like to call Paul. I hear glass shatter and I know that Paul once again has to buy Emily a new glass. Kim and I look at each other and then to the door, I glance at Kim again and see this mischievous little smirk on her face.

"_What?"_

"_He's gonna get what he deserves."_ Was her simple reply.

"_PAUL. CALM DOWN NOW."_ Sam speaks loud but he doesn't use the alpha voice. I know he wants Paul to learn how to control his anger so he always gives Paul a chance to calm himself before Sam uses the alpha voice.

"_NO! THIS IS BULLSHIT. YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT, HOW DARE YOU-"_ He starts to stutter.

He's so angry he can't even talk. Without even thinking I get out of bed and rush out of my room to the stairs. I run half way down the stairs, the pack can see me but I'm still in the dark a little. I see Bella and Jake on the couch with Quil right next to Bella. Jared is sitting in one of the other recliners, while Embry lounges on the floor. Paul is standing up in front of the other recliner. Sam is standing in the door way of the kitchen.

The pack looks bored, but I can't blame them they've seen Paul pissed off more than enough times. Sam looks hesitant and keeps glancing behind him. _His mind is always on Emily's safety. _That's what an imprint does, it's a natural instinct. Bella looks freaked out, her eyes are wide and she's shrinking into the sofa as well as Jacob's side. Its then that I finally rest my eyes on Jacob, he just looks pissed and just a little freaked out. What hurts me though is when he puts his arm around Bella. _To protect her. _

"Paul. Please, just let it go. Just stop. " I made sure to keep my voice even. If it were to have any hint of sadness or distress, Paul would phase, because he knows I'm hurt. Everyone in the room looks at me, but my eyes are on Paul only. He's looking right back at me I can see the battle going on in his head; he's trying to beat his anger.

I let my eyes drift around the room again Sam looks calmer and not as tense. Jared has the same little mischievous smirk Kim had. Quil and Embry are sharing looks. _Probably making a silent bet_, _will Paul control his anger or will he phase?_ Bella still has the freaked out look on her face. _Good, she should be_. Jacob though now looks concerned; his lips are still thinned so I know he's still pissed. I bring my eyes back to Paul glad to see the shaking has stopped and now he's just taking deep breaths. I'm about to reach out my hand for him to grab as comfort.

"_Settle down now boys, we have a guest. Dinner is ready, let's eat." _

I see Emily poking her head around Sam giving me a knowing look and holding a plate for me. I make to step down the stairs but Paul is already on his way to the kitchen grabbing the plate. He walks past Emily, into the kitchen and I hear him opening another cabinet. _Thank you, Paul. _

I start to turn around and I almost bump right into Kim.

"_Kassie wait!"_ I snap my head back to look at Jacob he's waving me over. _He's acting like this little scene did not just happen. _

"_Come here you need to meet Bella." _

I hesitate on the steps, I look at Sam and Emily but she's gone now and he's got his poker face on. _Seriously, half the time you're Wise-One the Great, but now you give no guidance. Thanks Sam, thanks._

I decide to be polite, exactly how I was taught to and go down the stairs. My hands on the railing helping me keep balance, I feel like I'm walking to my death. I make it to the bottom stair and just look at him. Jake stands up and pulls Bella up along with him. The guys are just watching so I shoot them all a look. _Can you guys make this anymore awkward? _

"_Kassie this is Bella. Bella this is Kassie."_ I see a smile come to his face, but I can also see the question in his eyes. He's wondering why I'm not being my normal cheerful polite self_. Well I'm being polite but not cheerful. _

"_It's nice to finally meet you I've heard a lot about you."_

I snap my eyes to Bella now and finally get a really good look at her. She has brown hair and brown eyes. She's pale almost as pale as me, I can tell she's blushing but it's the embarrassment blush. Her blush isn't 24/7 natural, like all the beautiful girls guys imagine they have. That gives me a little satisfaction, because now she and I are on the same level. My cheeks are red but not a blush look, well it kind of looks like it. I can tell that she's most likely tall about 5'6 I would guess and she's gangly. But she's pretty; I can't even deny that part. I can see why Jake is attracted to her. She's got that silent beauty to her. _Something that I can never have_. That brings a bitter taste to my mouth.

"_Oh that's nice; I wish I could say the same about you_. _It's nice meeting you too_." _Liar_. I watch as Bella flinches a little.

I didn't mean to let that slip I had a word vomit moment. I hear a snort behind me knowing Kim is proud to see that I'm not letting this bring me down. I look back at Jacob and he looks pissed. _Huh. Seems like he's the bomb tonight. Go on Jacob say something, scold me. _

"_GUYS DID YOU NOT HERE DINNER!"_ Just like that all the guys shoot out of their spots and race to the kitchen. I see Sam lingering in the doorway I don't want to look at his face. I don't know how he'll feel about what I said to Bella. I watch Jake lead Bella to the kitchen and I see him lean down to whisper something in her ear, just before he pushes her in.

I feel Kim's hand pull on my shoulder a little as if to say we should go back upstairs. But my feet are glued to the floor. Seeing Jake with her just makes me angrier. _I mean he doesn't know what happened 'cause I haven't told him. So that's my fault, I can't blame him for that. Why can he comfort her but not me I'm the imprint not her_. My eyes sting with tears and my throat constricts. I won't let the tears fall though. Not downstairs.

I feel Kim tug on my shoulder again but just as she does he looks over at me, he looks back into the kitchen to make sure Bella's okay. Just as he decides to start walking over, Paul pushes past him carrying 2 plates.

I watch as Jacob and Paul have a glare contest with each other. I hear Paul let out a warning growl before walking right up to me. Since Paul is so much taller he blocks my view of Jacob and hands me the plate wordlessly, I look up at him, with a small smile.

"_Thank you." _

"_It's me that should be thanking you._"

He continues to look at me, he's searching my face for any sign as to what made me upset earlier. Jared shows up behind Paul, also with 2 plates, he gives Kim a plate and a kiss. He looks at me and nods his head in the direction of the kitchen and gives me a wink. I give him a smile.

"_Kassie? Will you tell me?"_ Paul's voice makes me look at him again. I wish I could tell him I mean he's like my brother, I just can't I don't want anyone else to know. I shake my head and give him a sad smile then turn to head back upstairs.

I turn back one last time Sam is in the doorway looking at me. It's like he's trying to read my mind. _Sorry dude I don't have the werewolf gene._ No sign of Jacob, I look back at Paul.

"_Not now." _I shoot a glance at Sam knowing that he'll tell Emily to forget the dishes for once and come back up to my room.

"_Goodnight."_

With that I head back upstairs I hear Kim say goodnight as well, before she follows me back up to my room. When we reach my room Kim goes back over to the bed while I shut the door I lean against the door for a second. _If I keep the door closed it'll be like they aren't there._

I make my way over to the bed and set my plate on it. When I look at Kim she has a small smile on her face.

"So Johnny Depp marathon?" I laugh at Kim's statement and walk over to the DVD section by my books.

* * *

><p><em>I don't own Twilight!<em>

_I know this is emotional for Kassie but she's strong she needs to have her grieving time. _

_Thank you all who are reading this, please leave feed back! _

_xoxo_


	5. Nasty Word Vomit

**Nasty Word Vomit**

Emily came up right after dinner was done and joined our ' Hottest man on earth marathon'. I could still hear the boys downstairs, it at least seemed like Paul was able to keep his cool. Quil and Embry had patrol for tonight, so they left early and I waited for Jacob and Bella to leave, luckily that wasn't too long. Once they left I felt more comfortable, and once they left the three remaining boys, well Jared and Paul went out back and shifted to wolf for fake fighting. All the boys love doing that I think it makes them feel manlier.

"_You guys don't need to stay the night. I'm fine"_ Instantly both of their heads snapped to look at me. I could see the concern in both their eyes.

"_No really. Em you're right down the hall, with Sam. And Kim I know you and Jared don't always have that much time together. So go spend the night at his house, I'll be your cover."_ I made sure to give her a wink at that part. We all know how easy it is to embarrass Kim with that.

"_No I'm not leaving you alone." _

"_No really you guys go. I'll be fine."_

It went back and forward for a while like that but I was finally able to convince them. I promised that if I needed anything that I would go get Emily. Once they left my room and I knew they were downstairs I fell back on my bed.

I really just wanted to be alone. I stayed like that until I heard Paul, Jared and Kim leave. Then I had to wait for Sam and Emily to go to sleep. I knew I didn't have to worry about Kim or Emily telling my secret, it may be hard to keep stuff from your imprint, but it can be done. I have a lot of experience in that department.

I finally sat up and looked around my room. _What color should I paint the walls? Blue. Purple. Yellow. Grey._ I know I just want something different. I don't know how long I was up for but eventually I fell asleep.

Dream. 

-I'm in a forest walking along a curvy concrete path. I'm obviously not in La Push because we don't have paths like this. It appears to be about midday but it's hard to tell with all the clouds. I'm wearing that same white dress. I look up towards the sky and scrunch my face up, confused. I hear footsteps behind me and I whirl around but I don't see anyone. In my peripheral vision I see a black figure, it looks like a shadow. I look towards it but it vanishes right before I can set both eyes on it. I hear the laugh again but this time to my left. I look that way and then all of a sudden the forest seems to be spinning in a circle but I'm standing still. I start to get dizzy so I grab my head between my head and let out a distressed yelp. I stay like that looking at the path until all of a sudden I can hear a voice. I recall hearing this voice before, it sends a cold shiver down my spine. "Kassie.. Kassie Girl over here" I look behind me. I open my mouth to talk but I'm stopped by a hand being placed over my mouth. "Shhh.. Kassie girl" His hand doesn't leave my mouth but I can feel his hand up and down my side. "Be a good girl" I try to struggle out of his hold but It's no use. I can see the black shadow approaching me, the hands from the man are now groping. The black shadow starts to run at a full sprint towards me and just when it's right in front of me it transforms into the figure of a wolf. The wolf charges at the man behind me but the man is able to dodge it. I turn to watch what's going on but they both disappear into the forest. My instinct tells me not to follow so I stay planted, and now I'm spinning in the circle trying to find the right way to leave. But before I can make a decision I hear a twig snap from where the wolf figure and the man disappeared. I turn to face the area and I see it's the black figure, I don't feel as alarmed now. I stand there letting it approach me. When the figure stands in front of me he places something in front of him, it looks like he wants me to take what he's holding. I take whatever it is and when I glance down it's a newborn baby. I look back at the-

I sit up straight in bed and I can feel the sweat on me but my body feels cold. My breathing is heavily labored, I'm struggling to breathe. I sit there in my bed trying to calm myself and not think about that horrible nightmare. I'm able to calm my breathing so I shove the covers off of me, I feel suffocated. I lean back on my hands and just look around my room counting to 10 in my head over and over again.

I move my eyes to the clock on the desk in my room 5:17am. _Jeez. _

I let my eyes fall to trash can that contains my wrinkled white dress, just like that something snapped in me. I shoot out of bed and run to the trashcan dumping everything on the ground. I grab the white dress and search for anything to use so I can light it on fire. Absolutely nothing. I throw it on the ground frustrated that I can't destroy the thing. I move to my desk and swipe everything onto the ground I don't want anything. I want everything to be a mess. I walk over to the bookcase and just start taking all the books throwing them down. _Yea now would be the time I remember my first grade librarian saying treat books with care. Whatever._ I continue to go shelf by shelf not caring about the noise I'm making. Once I hit the final shelf I still feel so angry.

I run over to my closet and swing open the door. I walk into it and just start throwing all my clothes out on my floor I can't stop. I don't want any of these anymore. Once I'm done in my closet I'm stopped when I catch site of my reflection in the mirror. Without even thinking I punch the mirror. I need to feel pain I need to feel something right now. I continue to punch the mirror, my knuckles are starting to bleed. I don't stop until I feel arms wrap around me and pull my away from the mirror, restraining me. I continue to kick and struggle but the arms don't let up. I know its Sam but right now I'm too far gone to care.

I start sobbing and just start to slide down until I'm kneeling on the floor, Sam still leaves his arms wrapped around me. I continue to stay in that position until I fall on to my butt and cover my face with my hands. I push myself as hard as I can away from him and keep pushing myself with my feet until I'm huddled in my closet. I look behind Sam and see Emily in the doorway. Once our eyes connect she makes her way over to me. When she sits down next to me I huddle close to her and I can see her give a look to Sam that clearly says Get out. I turn my head away and put it on Emily's shoulder. I hear Sam leave my room but he doesn't close my door nor does he close his.

"_Kassandra what happened? Why didn't you come get me like you said you would?" _I can tell she's more concerned than mad but I can hear a hint of madness in there.

"_I need a shower. I really need a shower."_ With that I let go of Emily and make my way to the bathroom. I hear her following behind me.

"_I'm okay Em. Go back to bed."_

"_No. I don't trust you right now. You've already lied about being okay once tonight. Go take your damn shower, but I'm staying with you" _

It's rare for Emily to snap at a person but I guess this is one of those times, however I try to act like I'm unfazed and enter the bathroom.

"_I'm going to get the first aid kit. Sam's right there so don't even think of trying anything."_ And with that she turns around and heads down the steps.

I slam the door once again just trying to piss them off but don't bother locking it. Sam will probably break the lock for Em anyways.

I turn on the shower and strip my clothes off. I test the water to see if it's hot enough. It seems fine but when I step in the shower I feel like I need to make it hotter. The water makes my skin red almost immediately and burns but I need that right now.

I grab that little body wash thing. W_hat are these even called?_ I pour some soap onto the bath scrub and just start scrubbing at my skin. I need to get the feel of that man's hands._ I don't even know if I should call him a man, he's a…ahh. Sick bastard! There we go._ I keep scrubbing and scrubbing, it feels good. I hear the door open and Emily walks. I hear her put down the toilet lid and sit down on it.

"_I'm not suicidal.""_

"_I don't know that."_

It's quiet. I sit down in the tub and throw the scrub away from me. I let the water rush over me as I pull my knees to my chest and just start sobbing.

"_Jeez Kassandra turn down the hot water it's like a steam room. _

I decide to listen to her and turn it all the way to freezing instead. I don't know how much longer I stay there.

"_Kassie. Why don't you come out now?" _I hear only concern in her voice.

I don't make a move I just bury my head into my crossed arms. I don't want to move I just want get that filth off of my body. I feel like it's deep into my skin. I don't even see Emily turn off the reach through the curtain to shut off the shower. The water stops but I still scratch, I hear the shower curtain pulled back and Emily wrap a towel around me. I don't move a muscle but she lifts me by my arms up, making me stand up. I don't feel embarrassed standing in front of her right now I just feel numb.

Emily lets me dry myself off and then hands me my clothes. I take them from her and start getting dressed. Once I'm done I move past Emily making my way back to my room. Emily comes in behind me and closes the door. We both sit down on the bed and she takes my right hand to start cleaning them and then wraps them up. Once she's done we both just sit there on the bed, she's still holding on to my hand though

"_I had a nightmare. It was so real, I just needed to do something I was angry_ I'm sorry-" I whisper this to her, I don't wanna make too much noise.

"_Kassandra you listen to me right now. Look at me. You don't say you're sorry you have nothing to be sorry for do you hear me?"_ Her voice is firm and I can't help but look at her. I nod my head, and she gathers me in her arms while softly rocking me to sleep.

I wake up the next morning Emily must've moved me when I fell asleep. I don't feel her next to me, but I hear movement coming from downstairs. I also notice that my door is open. I stretch like a cat on my back. Once I relax I just lay in bed, I turn my head to face the center of the room. It's a big old mess. I crawl out of bed and drag myself to the center. I notice that all the glass that would have been from the mirror is gone. _Sam_

I sit with one leg curled and one bent up so I can rest my elbow on my knee. I don't even know where to start_. What should I do? Do I even want all of this stuff anymore?_ I'm brought out of my thought process by Kim bursting through my room.

"_Hey Em' sent me up here."_ It's only then does she start to actually notice the clutter all over the room. _"WOW"_

"_Yeah."_ I feel a little foolish about it now but at the time it really helped. Last night was good but I still feel like there is something I need to do.

"_Kass. What happened? Why's your hand all taped up?" _

"_I had a meltdown after this nightmare last night. I also punched the mirror."_ I make sure to whisper.

I know the guys are downstairs. Now that I think about it, it's pretty pointless, because Sam saw last night and whoever patrols with him will see last night's event_. Well shoot._

"_Do you wanna talk about it at all?"_

"_No not right now. I want to get some food."_ Even after I say that I don't get up to move. I hear Kim start to walk away.

" _I'll be back up with some food."_ And then she's gone.

I sit there and look around a little bit more. I bring my eyes back to my bandaged hand coming to the conclusion that I should just put everything back. I start to pick up the books I had taken off and start putting them on shelf in a random order.

"_Hey. Here ya go." _I jump at the sound of Kim's voice. I didn't hear her come in.

"_Thanks."_ The plate has eggs, bacon and a blueberry muffin. _Yum!_

"Do you need any help?"

"_Hmm" _Is my only response

We sit there for a bit in silence both just eating our food. Once I'm finished I start to go back to the books, Kim is soon to follow. We don't make talk. I don't mind it but it's starting to get a little awkward. I mean usually the two of us are always talking.

"_So how did it go last night with Jared?"_ I sneak a glance over at Kim and her face is as red as a tomato. I start to laugh, not in a way to embarrass her but in a good way.

"_Shut up. It was nice. We didn't do anything so don't think like that. It was…It was"_

"_Kim you don't have to talk about it." _I can tell she's relieved we may be best friends but we both know some things don't need to be said.

After that we continue to have small talk. We talk about school and how excited she is to be a senior, I'm still a junior. After about 2 hours we are able to get the room cleaned up again. It takes such a short time to destroy it but it takes forever to clean it back up._ Isn't that ironic?_

"_So Jared wants to go on a date today." _

"_Really? Last night wasn't enough?"_ I just get a kick out of seeing her blush like that.

"_Hardy har har. Well I was just wondering if you'd be okay tonight_?"

"_Kim you go have fun. I'm okay I have Emily."_

"_Alright if you're sure." _

"_Yes I am. Go get lover boy and have fun."_

We hug and she tells me to call if I needs anything. _Guess I should go downstairs_. With one look out the window I see that it's semi cloudy but no rain. I go to my closet and decide to wear skinny jeans, beige flats, and a black cami with a grey cardigan. _Time to face the music. _

As I leave my room I make sure I close my door, normally I wouldn't but I don't need anyone snooping around right now. I walk down the stairs and I can hear Paul, Quil and Embry. I go into the kitchen and sit down in one of the chairs. _Jus act normal_.

"_Hey Kass!"_ Embry

"_Hey girl Heyyy"_ I roll my eyes at that, Quil will always act like a little kid.

"_Hey."_ Paul.

"_Hey guys how's it going?"_ _Smile._

I'm able to sit at the table with the rest of them and not be uncomfortable. The boys continue to talk but I just sit there quietly enjoying this. I feel some sit beside me and I know it's Emily so I look over and smile gratefully at her, she gives me a wide smile back_. You never notice the scars especially when she smiles. I think they make her even more beautiful if anything. _I look at the clock on the wall 3:00pm. _Wow I slept longer than I thought._

"_Hey where's Sam? I didn't know he had patrol during the day." _I don't know why I asked that. Another word vomit moment. I mean I know he patrols today. I just wanna know who he's with.

"_He has patrol with Jacob today._ " _Great of all people._ I pray that Sam is able to control his damn thoughts.

"_Alright well I'm gonna go for a walk."_ I glance at Emily and see that she's hesitant.

"_I won't go far. Just need to clear my head. I'll bring my phone." _Emily stands up motions for me to follow her. She leads me back up to my room

"_Alright. I'll let you go, but if I call you answer. Don't think I won't have the boys let Sam know you're out and about by the way."_ Success!

"_Thank you." _

I give Emily a hug, before she leaves the room. I grab my purse and my white dress that I stuffed under my bed when Kim and I were cleaning. I put my dress in my purse so no one sees. _It was my favorite dress the boys would know some things majorly wrong._

I grab my phone on my way out of the room. Again I make sure to close my door.

I make my way back down the stairs and with a quick good bye I'm out the door. _Where to go? Where to go? Somewhere I can find rocks… the cliffs._

I make my way in the direction of the cliffs and get lost in my thoughts. Nice weather right now but I can smell the rain. I have to make sure I'm home before that. _Didn't think to bring a sweatshirt or coat._ I continue on thinking mostly about school predicting how it will be. I usually don't care about that but right now it's an amazing distraction.

I enter the forest path that will lead to the cliffs. Making sure to watch where I step 'cause my flats don't have that good of a grip so if I fall there's no saving myself. The path isn't that long just a little bumpy and steep. I reach the top of the cliffs; I decided not to go to the tallest one.

Find a rock. _One that is heavy enough to sink but one that I'm able to lift_. I look around me, spotting one that would be just perfect. I walk over to pick it up it's a little heavy but not too bad. I make my way back to my purse and take out the wrinkled white dress. _Okay smart one now find a way to make sure this rock takes this dress down to the bottom of the sea_.

I could always try to tie the dress around it. I give that idea a try and it takes a few times but I manage to tie the dress around the rock. I can't double knot it however this will just have to do.

I stand up and then bend down to pick up the rock. I trudge over to the edge of the cliff and as hard as I can toss the rock over it which isn't that far. I lean a little over the edge to watch the rock go down taking that stupid wrinkled white dress with it. I watch the rock make a splash and then it starts to sink, getting further and further away from me.

I don't know how long I stand there but I get lost in the feeling of the wind blowing my hair. I look across the ocean and out to the horizon. I can see the clouds building, I had already guessed it would rain but now it looks close to a storm. I was so lost in my thoughts I didn't hear the heavy footsteps approach me.

I feel someone's hot hand on my right shoulder before they roughly turn me around. My immediate thought is_. Oh God please go away._

I look at the one person I didn't expect to see. _Jacob_. I guess he's going to chew my ass out for being rude with Bella. _Well too bad I'm not about to sit here and get lectured by him_.

I try to yank my arm out of his grip but instead he drags me away from the edge. I look at the back of his head I can tell he's shaking and the grip on my arm is definite bruising.

"_What the hell are you doing?" _I give him a dirty look that he obviously see.

"_Getting you away from the edge of the edge_. _It's dangerous, you could slip and fall._"

"_Oh yes thank you for being so concerned about my safety now." _I want him to feel guilt. He turns around grabs both of my shoulders. I still have the look on my face.

"_Don't give me that look. If anything I should be the one with the disgusted look." _

"_Why because I was rude to Bella last night? Fine I apologize for my rude behavior." _It's obvious that I'm being sarcastic.

"_Stop it. That's not what this is about." Did I do something else? _I try to see if I can remember anything else.

"_Oh finally it's a conversation not about her. Well then please tell me what this is about."_

"_You tell me."_

"_Okay the cryptic message isn't processing."_

"_Stop being funny I'm being serious right now. What happened two days ago?" _Jacob lightly pushes me away from him. _Oh that. Crap come up with something. I'm not talking about this right now not with him. I'll tell him when I'm ready. Think think – _

"_You ditched me so I went to Port Angeles by myself." _

"_And…?"_

"_And what? You were the one to ditch you know."_

"_I meant later that day. " _As Jacob says this he pulls a leather bound book out of his pocket. _No it's not what I think. _

I stand there instead waiting to see what he does.

"_Since you aren't going to talk then maybe I'll refresh your memory. Let's see. Oh yes. Okay so today i-"_

"_Stop."_

"_Oh so you know what I'm talking about."_

"_Yes I know okay I know. Why are you being like this? You know what happened and you're yelling at me now? Do you know how that feels?" _Tears have started to fall because I'm so hurt that he doesn't seem to care. I watch as Jacob's eyes and stance soften. He reaches towards me but I step back.

"_I'm sorry. I know I'm being an ass. I'm sorry. I just couldn't stand the thought that you didn't tell me I was gonna be a dad. I was hurt that you didn't call me or talk to me."_

"_I'm not going to accept your apology right now. I didn't know about the baby till I went to the hospital. I didn't come to you because things aren't the same between us anymore Jacob. Plus you weren't there you were busy." _If Jacobs going to calm down and try not to fight then I'll go along with it.

"_You could've pulled me aside, or something. I know I wasn't there and I'm sorry about that. I am so sorry I wasn't there to protect you. I just thought you'd understand why I didn't go. I regret not going with you. Kass I am sorry, I know things have changed and I can take fault to that. I talked to Sam because I got this deep pain and he says it could've been me feeling your pain, I am so sorry that I ignored it. "_

"_I'm not going to blame you for what happened or the fact that you didn't know the pain was in fact me being… I could blame you for picking a girl over your imprint but that's not my business. It is your fault things have changed, you shut me out. You avoided me like the plague. The only reason we were even going to Port Angeles tomorrow is because Sam wanted someone to go with me, but everyone else had plans. Was that night really that bad?" _

"_No it wasn't bad it was great but it was a mistake-" _Something inside me snaps. I just want him to hurt like I did.

"_A mistake?! I will not stand for you to say my baby was conceived as a mistake-"_

"_OUR baby. Your forgetting OUR baby. And that isn't how-"_

"_Oh stop it Jacob. Just stop. I really don't want to hear anything else out of your mouth."_

"_Would you just let me finish?" _I can tell that Jacob is starting to get angry again. He hates being interrupted.

"_Fine. Finish and then leave."_

"_Kassie it's my job to protect you. I'm sorry that I bailed and didn't even call. It's just Bella- "_

"_Oh Bella Bella Bella. Everything is about Bella. For once stop thinking about her. Think about what I'm saying, and everything that's happened. Or am I just such a 'job' that it doesn't matter what I say. Would you have loved our son or would he just be a job too? A job that would interfere with you precious time with Bella-"_

"_THAT'S ENOUGH!" _Jacob's shaking and I know I should back off. Any rational person who was standing before a man that changes into a wolf that could kill you would back off. Me, I decide to keep going. Just all the anger coming forwards I couldn't stop it. _Word vomit. _

"_Would you have even been around? Or would you be a. Dead. Beat. Dad." _

Right after I say that Jacob I watch as Jacob tries to back away. However I blink and next thing I know is that there is a giant russet wolf, in front of me standing to his full height, looking down at me baring his teeth.

_Oh crap. I didn't mean that and now your stupid nasty word vomit has you in a very, very dangerous situation. _

* * *

><p><em>Yikes...stay tuned to see what happens!<br>_

_How do you think the confrontation was? Too much or just right? Lol_

_Please review and thank you_

_I don't own Twilight_

_xoxo_


	6. Family

**Family**

I had seen Jacob in wolf form before, when he first told me everything and many times after that. But this isn't the same Jake as he usually is; no right now he is a very mad wolf. _Damn me and my stupid mouth. Damn my anger getting the best of me. Damn me. _

I know not to look him in the eyes, he'll see it as a threat. I feel bad though I have to make this better. While keeping my eyes down I open my mouth to speak.

"_Jake I'm sorry. I didn't mean that, you know I have word vomit and I was angry at you-"_

I'm cut off by Jake giving off a very scary growl. _Okay maybe now isn't the time to apologize. _

_Sam now would be a really really good time to the anal alpha you are, you always check on the pack_. _Why are none of the guys seeing this? Isn't there usually 1 or – oh Jake is probably that one since it's still day. _

I'm scared now I'm angry at myself now. I know I should never have uttered those words, I know they were the worst words to say to any man. Especially one that is emotional right now. _We both were, that's why you said it, in anger, humans do that okay? He'll forgive. He's not going to eat. He's not going to eat you. Oh God. _

If I wasn't his imprint I know I'd be dead, but as of right now the rule of the imprint is what's keeping me alive. His wolf recognizes me as his mate. Something about the smell of an imprint I think. Sam mentioned once that when they phase out of anger the wolf side kicks in and the human is only there like 1%.

For what seems like hours, is only a few seconds we stand there him growling and me not looking up. Everything sinks in now and I start to cry again, I can't help it. I move my eyes to look at Jacob, his pupils are dilated and his teeth are still showing. _He's so beautiful though. _ I cry even harder now though and I keep my eyes on Jacob and watch as his pupils shrink and his muzzle goes normal.

I can't feel my knees anymore; the only thing I feel is my butt hitting the grass. I don't care if it sets off Jacob I can't stand anymore I just want to cry right now. I bury my face in my hands I curl my knees to the side. I feel rain start to fall on my body, so much for getting home before it rains. I can feel my clothes start to grow heavy with water, I don't move to leave though. I only move my hands from my face when I feel a cold wet muzzle nudging my face. I look to the side to see Jacob standing in front of me, his eyes aren't dilated they are the beautiful chocolate brown that lets me know it's him in charge now. I don't smile at him instead I just look at him, waiting for his next movement. He brings his muzzle back to the side of my chin nudging me again. I continue to look at him, but now confusion is I'm sure glazing my eyes.

"_Am I forgiven? I'm sorry I'm so so sorry, that was the worst thing to say. I didn't mean it. I just-"_

He nudges my face again but this time gave me a little lick. I know that's his way of saying it's okay, he forgives me. Jacob keeps his nose near my cheek comforting me as my tears finally start to slow.

I feel Jacob move so I open my eyes to look at him and see that he's in a tense stance again this time though it's not at me. His eyes are looking over my shoulder and before I know it he's pushes me to the ground away from him. I see him jump over me, as if protecting me. _Oh god is there a vampire. _

I turn to see what he's looking at just as he charges at another wolf? I can hear the sounds of snapping, and growling. I look at the wolf Jacob's fighting the wolf is smaller, leaner, and a silver coat. _Paul._ I back further away to the side, whenever one starts to stray my way the other blocks him and they go at each other again. Neither one is winning Jacob may be bigger than Paul but Paul is faster.

"_Stop_" my voice is a hoarse whisper. Neither one makes any indicator that they heard me.

"_Stop"_ my voice is now normal, I see both of their ears twitch either signaling that they heard me or another one of the boys has phased.

"_Stop it! Stop it_" I'm yelling now.

This time the only one who show's that he hears me is Jacob. Now that Jacob has stopped fighting Paul takes his chance and pounces on Jacob holding him down. Paul's in his face growling at him, biting at him and Jacob is just letting him. I can only imagine what those two are saying in their heads.

"_Paul please! Stop it. Please."_ I'm desperate now. I watch as Paul stops growling at him, but he doesn't let him up.

"**Paul. Phase back. Now."** Sam's voice comes right behind me. I look behind me only to just see his legs. I look up at him but his face is indifferent. Sam glances down at me before helping me and pushing me behind him.

I look beyond him at who is now in human form. _And naked. WOW! _I raise my eyebrow when I give him the once over. _Stop so not the time, can think about it later? NO no you can't think about it later that's wrong so very wrong. _

Paul still stands there breathing deeply, his hands are clenched at his sides. I see a pair of shorts come flying out of nowhere at Paul. I turn to look for where they came from and I see Embry behind Sam. His eyes aren't leaving the scene in front of him though, he's face isn't stony like Sam's.

I turn to look back at Paul, who has put on the shorts and it's now that I notice all the scratches and dry blood on him. I see him glance at me and his eyes soften not with an apology but with a sort of reassurance.

"**Jacob I suggest you stay as you are."** Sam really is scary when he's angry.

"_Now Paul. What the hell are you doing attacking Jacob like that?"_

"_Sam you didn't see what I saw. He was going to attack her, he phased out of anger and all that anger was directed at her. He-" _

"_What do you mean he was going to attack her?" _Embry's voice is quiet but everyone hears it.

He doesn't' want to believe that Jacob would do that. Speaking of Jacob I look over at him and see he's lying on his belly, in a submissive crouch. His nose is buried in his paws. I guess he feels me looking at him, he lifts his head and I see nothing but regret in his eyes. _Was he really going to attack me?_

"_From what I saw he and Kassie were fighting. She said something and he phased. The animal took over. He was is that stance, I know you know which one, he was fucking circling her Sam! Like a predator going in for the kill."_ Paul's still angry,

I'm guessing the only reason he hasn't phased is because of the Alphas order. _So he was thinking about attacking. Did he really circle me?_

"_Jacob. Is what Paul saying true?"_ Sam's voice only has authority still. He really is in control of his emotions. I hear a pitiful whine come from Jacob who burrows his nose in between his paws. His whine brings a sort of pain to my heart. _Is this the pain he was talking about? How'd he ignore this. _

"Embry take Kassie back home." Sam's voice is softer now.

Sam turns to look at me and gives me a look asking if I'm okay.

"_I'm fine. Thank you" _

I walk over to Embry, he's looking at Jacob. When I reach him he looks down at me and gives me a reassuring smile and with a nod of his head we head in the direction to leave the cliffs.

I hear Jacob let a sound, a mix between a howl and whine.

"_Shut up asshole."_

"**Paul. That's enough."**

"_What?"_

I can feel all three of their eyes burning into my back as I walk with Embry toward the tree line. However I can only feel one's pain and it makes my broken heart shatter. I keep my arms crossed across my chest and follow Embry back home. It seems like only seconds before I'm walking through the door.

Emily comes rushing out of the kitchen, her usual warm smile that turns to a frown.

"_What happened? Where's Sam and Paul-"_ She stops there because I'm sure Embry gave her the sign that they are okay but I'm not.

I just stand there with my arms crossed looking at my feet. I hear Emily walk over to me and feel her put her arm around me. She leads me into the kitchen and sits me down. I hear the front door open and shut knowing Embry left to spread the word, no one go to Emily's tonight.

"_Kassie? Are you still with me?_ I give her a nod.

"_Okay. I'm going to whip up some brownies and lemon tea. Sound good?"_

I give her another nod. I know she's being nice and not pushing me into talking. I hear her moving around and all the plates and pots clank. I focus on those sounds nothings really going through my head right now. I sit there for I don't know how long, just staring at the center of the table.

"_My purse_" I hear Emily stop moving.

"_What was that hun?"_

"_My purse…I- I left it on the cliff_." My voice is void of any emotion.

"_I need to go get it_" I get up to leave but I feel Emily grab my hand stalling me.

"_Hunny I'm sure Sam will get it. Why don't you go upstairs and change into something warm and hang your clothes on in the shower_."

She gives me a smile and I have to say I'm glad that she's not frowning anymore; a frown on Emily just doesn't look like it should be there. I had completely forgotten about the rain. I stop in the doorway of the kitchen.

"_I said something awful Emily." _I whisper this because my voice won't go any louder.

I head upstairs and go to my room, my door's open. I roll my eyes when I see that my window is open, and my room is a mess, especially my dresser, the drawer is on the floor across the room.

I go to my closet, taking notice to the fact that the mirror is gone. I pick out a pair of blue and white flannel plaid PJ's, a black sports bra, then I throw a sweatshirt over me. I take my wet clothes into the bathroom and hang my clothes over the shower line. I go to grab a towel and start ringing my hair out. I don't even look in the mirror I don't want to see myself. After my hair starts to feel more dry damp I go put the towel back where I got it.

I go sit on my bed crisscross applesauce and just stare out the window. I have to close it because the rain is pelting the window, lighting and thunder every now and then. I can't get Jacob out of my head. The emotions range from anger, resentment, sadness, regret.

_Would he have attacked me? I mean I know the imprint power is there, but look at Sam and Emily. NO! That's different that was an accident. Jacob would have attacked me out of vengeance. I don't blame him though, I shouldn't have said what I said. I was just so angry with him I needed a way to hurt him like I was hurt.. What if he had gotten to me? I'd be hurt but I know eventually I'd forgive him I can't deny him ever, like that one night I couldn't deny him when he came to me needing a release and to feel something._

It's like it was yesterday I can remember the feel of his lips bringing a fire to my skin everywhere he touched me. I can remember his rough hands sliding up my thigh. I can still see the clothes being ripped off in a desperate need. I can still remember the heat around us causing us to sweat. The sounds of our labored breathing, and my gasps mixing with his grunts and growls. I can still remember how my first orgasm felt and how it felt again with him. Everything seemed to fit perfectly; everything was actually passionate for what some would call a booty call. Afterwards he held me to him rubbing his hand up and down my arm. Neither of us spoke so I fell asleep the beat of his heart. When I woke up the next morning he was gone. I remember crying because I felt like a whore, I felt so used. Once I gathered myself I had to go wash my sheets before Sam and Emily woke up and continue on as any normal day_. I had always wondered if they had heard but from Emily's reaction yesterday she still thought I was a virgin._ _Why did I have to get stuck with an imprint who puts another girl before me? Why did I have no will to say no to him? Why did I have to go to Port Angeles that day? Why did that man pick me? Why did my baby get taken away from me? Why-'_

I'm brought out of my thoughts when I feel a hand on my arm. I jump from shock I hadn't heard anyone come in. I see Emily sitting in front of me I didn't even know that someone had sat down on my bed. I had been so wrapped in my thoughts. I bring my hand to my face to see if I cried again but I hadn't. Emily's just looking at me; I see the sympathy in her eyes. I give her a small reassuring smile.

"_Em' I'll be fine. Really, I just need some time to process what happened." _

"_Okay I'll leave you be, I'm going to leave your door open though. You know that if you need anything you come to me okay?"_ I hate to say it but sometimes Emily is more of a mom to me now than my mom had ever been.

"_I know. Thank you"_ I watch her nod and stand up to leave the room. At the door she stops though. She turns to look back at me.

"_I love you." _

"_I love you too"_ She goes to leave again but I stop her before she can

"_Emily you're the best mom ever"_ I don't know what made me say it but I felt that it needed to be said.

"_Kassandra you're the best daughter_." And with that she disappears from my sight.

I've always thought of Sam and Emily as my god parents but after everything, I feel as if they are my parents. No I will never ever replace my father or mother but still Emily and Sam are my family.

I hear the front door open. I only hear one set of foot prints so I know its Sam. I hear his footsteps enter the kitchen and come to a standstill. _Probably to greet Emily._ I also hear him set something on the table. I hope that's my purse. My cell is in there. _Oh shit my phone is gonna be soaked_.

"_Where is she?" _his voice is a whisper but I can still hear him. I mean my room is right above the kitchen and my doors open. Plus Sam's whisper is my normal voice. I smile with that thought because it's one of the things I always joke about with him.

"_She's upstairs. I had her change into some dry clothes. She's resting, she's in a state right now. "_

"_Good she needs rest. Did she say anything?"_

"_No. She'll come to me when she wants to talk. She'll be happy to know you got her purse."_

"_I have to call Billy. I need him to know that either Jacobs not coming home tonight or he's gonna be in an unstable mood_."

"_WAIT! Did he- Did he hurt her?"_

Emily's voice is now a little high pitched. She made the connection of how I'm acting now and Jacob being in an unstable mood. Just the same way Sam was after he hurt her.

"_No. Thank goodness. However he did phase out of anger near her, so he could of. I'm guessing that when Kass started to cry the wolf started to be submissive. No matter how much the wolf doesn't realize love and only sees a mate. If its mate is hurt the wolf will let the human side come through."_

That little explanation confused me. I've been around Jacob in his wolf form and he didn't treat me like just a "mate". Then again he wasn't usually phasing out of anger, unlike today.

"_I swear. I'm going to give that boy the what for-"_

"_Emily, Paul took care of that part and I gave him a deep lecture. But he now has his own guilt and sorrow that will be eating away at him. I know your mad, I'm beyond mad, but don't be too hard on him."_ I could hear the sympathy in Sam's voice. He can relate to Jacobs feeling right now.

"_Well that's good to know. But as I was going to say before you interrupted that I need to have a talk about the boys controlling their anger."_

"_Trust me they know every time the patrol with me." _I hear the sadness in his voice and I know he's thinking of the time he phased in front of Emily.

"_I love you. You know that. You have to stop beating yourself up Sam."_

"_I love you too." _

I hear more walking so I'm guessing that Sam walked over to the phone.

"_Billy. It's Sam-" _

After that I decided to block out the conversation I don't want to hear it. I uncross my legs and lay down. I roll my ankles because my feet fell asleep_. I really really hate that._

Before I fall asleep I hear Sam hang up the phone.

"_She accused Jacob of being a dead beat dad. I know she was angry and she didn't mean it."_

"_She mentioned that she said something awful." _

I must've fallen asleep, because I became half conscious and it was dark out. I heard footsteps coming up the stairs, so I laid my head back down and closed my eyes. I heard the footsteps stop outside my room. I could feel eyes on me.

"_She called me mom earlier."_ Emily's whisper holds pride and is a little shaky. She really wants to be a mom.

"_That's because you are a mom to her._" It's quiet for a minute.

"_Sam? Do you ever think about us adopting her? I mean I know she's seventeen but she is like a daughter-"_

"_Emily. Let's let everything settle down and we can think on that later. But yes I would love to adopt her. We already are a family."_ I hear quiet footsteps walking away; I know that's Emily leaving. Sam lingers in the doorway for a bit until he walks over.

He crouches down next to my bed.

"I _know you awake stinker. Don't forget your living with a werewolf, so we have super hearing. Your heart beat picked up"_

I peek my eyes open and see him smiling at me. I can't help but smile back. I'm lying on my stomach with my hands curled against my chest. His eyes hold laughter and I'm a little embarrassed that he caught me eavesdropping. So I turn my head to so my nose is touching the mattress and shake my head a little. Sam lets out a small laugh.

"_Go back to bed"_ He doesn't stand up so I know he's hesitating on something. I than feel him kiss my head. I don't move, I think he takes that as a bad sign 'cause I hear him let out a sigh and stand up making his way out the door.

"_I love you and I'm sorry if my comment reminded you-"_ He stops, so I look over. His hand is on the door handle and he's looking at me

"_I love you too stinker_" and with that he shuts the door half way and makes his way to bed.

I fall asleep again with a content mind. My dreams are filled with me being surrounded by my family. My dad and my mom are there along with Sam and Emily. I also notice that there is a toddler running around and there is a warm hand resting on my back.

"_Jake"_

* * *

><p><em> Hey Everyone!<br>_

_Hope you enjoyed this chapter. I"m not sure how this one is but hopefully good._

_Thanks for all the reviews, favorites and follows. Leave feedback!_

**_I don't own anything related to Twilight that would be for Stephanie Myer_**

_xoxo_


	7. Cherries

**Cherries. **

This morning I was able to wake up to the sun shining. _Yes!_

I go through my normal routine. I decide to slide on yoga pants and a baggy t-shirt. _One thing about the guys not wearing shirts I get my pick of them. _

I go to the bathroom for a mirror to put on a dusting of eye shadow. I wonder how awkward today will go. _Will Jake even show up?_

I head downstairs deciding it's now or never. When I get down there I see Embry and Quil in front of the TV, it looks like they are setting something up.

"_Hey guys umm what are you doing?"_

"_Kassie, Heyy!"_ Oh Quil.

Embry is just looking at me with an expression caught between "Hey" and a hesitant one.

"_So what are you doing to the TV?"_

"_OH! Hooking up the Xbox, I decided that because we always hang out here I might as well bring it over so we can all play."_

"_That's an awesome idea, now you guys don't have to be so boring."_

"_Hardy har- har, Kass_." As Quil's talking he doesn't pay attention to what he's doing so he somehow shocks himself.

"_OWW SHIT! Fuck this thing_" Embry and I bust out laughing it is so typical of Quil.

"_Dude you are soo stupid! Stop being such a baby, we heal fast now. Get over it"_ Embry is just on the floor holding his side laughing while Quil cradles his hand.

I roll my eyes and walk away deciding to leave the children to their toys. I go to the kitchen and see Emily working at the sink, washing dishes. I go to sit down at the table where Jared and Paul are eating.

"_Hey guys."_ It's funny how your voice can go from cheery to well not.

"_Hey Kass, bout time you woke up."_ Jaredjokes. With his comment I look over to the clock on the wall 1pm. _Damn_

"_Hey how are you doing this morning?"_ Paul's voice washes over me.

I can see Emily glance over her shoulder at me. Giving me acknowledgement, we both know she'll get to me later.

"_I'm doing fine. As usual everything will work out_"

"_As long as you're doing okay_."

"_I am. So you all know_?"

It gets silent for a little minute before Paul decides to answer.

"_Yea. Just know that-" _

"_Jared where's Kim?"_ I cut Paul off cause I'm going to be in a good mood today. Everyone resumes what they were doing. Embry and Quil louder than before.

"_At home, her parents are both home today." _

"_Oh that's good_"

"_Hey why don't we go out today you and me_" Paul is talking with his mouthful, showing us all what he's shoved in there.

"_Paul! Seriously chew, sallow and then talk..I'll put a mirror in front of you so you can see what we see_"

"_Sorry Em."_ He flashes her that famous wolfish grin. He turns his gaze to me.

"_So what do you say?"_

I take a while to think about it, there's one place I want to go. _They'll never allow it_

"_Yea let's go_"

"_Awesome! Where?" _I take a deep breath knowing that this could be bad.

"_Port Angeles."_

And then it's quiet. _Again. _

Emily's frozen at the sink. Paul and Jared are both looking at me with expressions of disbelief and horror. Even Quil and Embry are quiet, I know they heard it's impossible with their hearing not to. My eyes are shooting around the room, wondering who will speak first.

"_Kassandra are you sure that's a good idea? It was only 2 days ago that…"_

"_Yes Emily. I'm sure, I want to go and prove that I can still be safe, maybe if I go I can get a peace of mind and start moving on!"_

"_Are sure you wanna take Paul? I mean we all know, no offense man, you aren't the best with emotional situations, especially girls?"_

"_Jared's right. Maybe you should go with Emily"_

"_Emily was my first choice, but I feel safer going with one of the pack. It's just extra security."_

I pause for a moment, I can hear Embry and Quil back in the living room making little noise to seem like they aren't ease dropping, but I know better. I see look at Emily and she nods understanding my reasoning. I look into Paul's eyes and he stares right back at me, clearly anticipating my response.

"_Paul is good with me_. Emily you know you can trust him to be there for me."

"_I know. I just wish you'd wait, maybe see someone before you go. I just don't know if you're ready but then again only you would know when you are"_ Emily's words are coated with concern.

"_I'm not ready. It's just I know have to do this" _

I look over at Paul and smile reassuringly at him. He gives me a nod.

"_Alright I'm in"_

"Great I'll go upstairs and change into something a little more appropriate."

With that I'm out of the kitchen, passing the living room seeing that Quil and Embry have the Xbox all set up. I go up the stairs to my room. I change into some flare jeans, I decide to keep my shirt on but tie it to the side, I grab a gray sweatshirt as well. _It's sunny now but that never lasts long. _

I go to pick up my purse and that's when I hear the back door open then close. I can hear all the boys giving their Hey mans. I know that it's Jacob and Sam, they had patrol this morning, there must not be any vampire scents considering it's been scarce since the Cullen's left.

I decide to just wait in my room, Paul's a big boy he can handle the fireworks for the both of us.

I hear someone walk closer to my room which means they are entering the living room. _Most likely Jake. Please don't come up here._

I can hear small murmurings, no blasts so I feel that it's safe. _Hopefully Em was able to get everything out and Sam understands. _I go to my door and slowly open it.

"_WHAT?! Are you insane? No, she won't go_." Sam's voice is thunderous. _Then again maybe not._

I let go of the door and walk backwards to my bed. Deciding I should just let it play out.

"_Sam please. She says she's has to do this, trust her_."

"_Emily it was just a couple of days ago that she was attacked. I mean how can you agree with this, you too Paul?"_

"_I trust her and I trust Paul just like I know you do. Let her go you can't order her to stay here_"

"_The hell I can't."_

"_What's going on?"_ And there's his voice, it can still send shivers down my spine no matter where we are in our relationship.

"_Paul and Kassie are going to Port Angeles_" Emily

"_No they aren't" _Sam

"_Can I add that she said she wants to not me_."

"_Shut up Paul._

I don't hear a verbal response from Jake, instead I hear his heavy footsteps making rapid pace towards the stairs.

"_Jake-" _Paul starts to say something, probably not comfortable with Jacob and I being this close to each other yet.

"_Leave them." _

I shut my eyes and open them when I hear the door open. I look up and see Jake standing there, he comes in and closes the door behind him. _Maybe he realizes to that my door is magical and can block out sound._

"_I really don't know if I'm ready to face you yet so please go away"_

"_No. I'm going to say what I have to say, whether you listen or not."_

"_I won't listen"_ I say stubbornly. _Yes you will._

"_Sure, Sure" _

I hear his footsteps moving towards my bed. I watch as he sits next to me. I move away a little bit to the side.

"_I'm not going to hurt you"_

"_I don't know that. Yesterday you were about to attack me as a wolf. Granted that was partially my fault." _He flinches at my words and his eyes become glossy.

"_Kassandra, what happened when I-I-I….well you know. It was a mistake, I let my emotions take over. I'm sorry. I was just so angry at everything that's happened. And when you accused me of possibly being a dead beat dad. I lost it. Look yesterday we both said things that we shouldn't of. I shouldn't have kept going on to the subject involving Bel-"_

"_Don't say her name right now. You'll make it worse."_

"_Oh so you are listening."_ He's trying to lighten the mood but now is not the time

"_Kassandra I want things to go back to the way they were between us. When you used to come to me when you were upset. I need you to trust me when I say-_"

"_I don't trust anything you say anymore Jacob. You should've been there! This shouldn't have happen to me. My baby boy should still be growing inside me."_

"_Our baby. I lost him too you know"_

"_I know I know I'm sorry it's just hard I guess because of how it happned. But Jacob you've broken me before all this happened and this just now put a thousand cherries on top."_

I stand up and grab my purse slinging it over my shoulder. I pull my auburn hair to one side, the curls cascading over my right shoulder.

"_I'm not done talking Kass."_

"_Yes you are because I can't handle it anymore. Not right now. I'm sorry for what I said yesterday. I wish I could take them back. I would I really would, both of us are at fault. I'm handling all of this my way and I'm being a mess and lashing out so I'm sorry. But facing you is not something I'm ready for. I look at you and all I can feel is hurt. If you want things to go back to how they were just remember actions speak louder than words, you of all people should know that."_

I look him in the eyes for a few seconds, my eyes have tears building up but I won't let them fall. _No more._ I break our eye contact and turn to walk out the room. Just as I reach the door I half turn around looking at him over my shoulder, he's still staring at me.

"_Jacob, Do you love me? Like really love me" _Jacob looks at me for a second before clearing his throat and standing up.

"_I don't know."_

"_How can you not know, Jacob? You love her and you know that. What do you feel for me?"_

"_I don't know okay. I feel a lot of things when it comes to you. But you knew even before I imprinted on you that I'm in love with Bella. I don't know what I feel with you but I love her." _

Now it's my turn to be quiet. _I did know that, but I hoped with the imprint he'd love me like I love him._

"_Love her enough to break an imprint?" _

"_What do you mean by that?"_

"_I mean it exactly how it sounded."_

" _I'm pretty sure an imprint can't be broken. Why? what are you thinking right now? Do you not want to be my imprint? _I can hear some panic and hurt in his voice. The thought of losing an imprint is hard no matter what the relationship.

"_I don't know if I do anymore Jake. Maybe you were wrong. Maybe our imprint is dysfunctional." _I try to let out a laugh but it's hard.

"_Don't say that, please. I do love you Kass and I know I love you more than a sister. It's just with Bella its different it's something stronger. It feels like its two completely different feelings of love."_

"_So you see me as more than a sister but even with the imprint I'm nowhere near first place."_

"_Kassie there's more to it than just what you're asking_-"

"_That wasn't a question, it was a statement Jacob_." I let my voice come out a little harsher than previously

"_Kass-"_

"_So you're saying you love me, but you're not IN love with me. You feel the effects of the imprint you admitted to that yesterday…."_

"_Yes"_ his voice is a whisper.

"_You love me."_

"_He nods."_

I turn around and walk to the door, opening it but not stepping out. I turn to look into his hopeful eyes, but what I say next gets rid of any hope he has for us going back to before.

"_Good. Now you can know how it feels to watch the person you claim to love walk away with someone else. Knowing they don't want you and they won't spare you a second thought. That they don't trust you._" My voice holds venom. My eyes show hurt and his eyes show sadness, he knows I'm referring to how I feel when he ditches me for her.

"Y_our pack brother has protected me more than you and is there for me more than you have been, for a long time."_

With that I turn around and walk out the door to head downstairs. _Ready to get the hell out of here_.

I reach downstairs and it's quiet. I know they heard the last bit of our conversation. If they heard anything else I don't know.

I walk into the kitchen and head over to Sam who he opens his arms for me.

"_Be careful."_

_"I will. Thank you for seeing it my way_."

I give a grateful and reassuring smile to Emily. I give her a hug as well.

I look at Paul. However I avoid everyone else. I hear Jacob walking down the stairs

_"Ready?"_

_"Yea, let's go"_

_"Bye guys."_

Paul and I walk to the front door and passing the stairs I can feel Jacobs stare, burning into me. I don't turn my head to look at him I can't.

Paul's arm drapes around my shoulder and I glance at him from underneath my eye lashes. He catches my stare and gives me a wink, his mouth is curved into his wolfish smile. _Tease. _

* * *

><p><em>Hey Everyone!<br>_

_Hope you enjoyed this chapter as well._

_Thanks for all the reviews, favorites and follows. Always feel free to leave feedback!_

**_I don't own anything related to Twilight that is all Stephanie Myer_**

_xoxo_


	8. I'll do it for you

_**I'd do it for you **_

"_Would you slow down?! I don't want you to crash my car."_ I was holding onto my seat praying to anyone who was listening to let me live. Paul is insane ass a driver, and he finds humor in my pleading for him to stop.

"_Seriously PAUL! Just 'cause you have super senses doesn't mean you're invincible._"

"_Yea it does_"

"_Well I'm not."_

"_Fine Kass I'll do it for you. You fun sucker."_ He says this while laughing. His smile has not left his face since we go in the car.

"_Thank you."_

I turn to look at him. I study his face, I know he's handsome everyone does. However right now as I'm looking at him its different. A feeling courses through me and I don't know what to make of it.

"_What?"_ He's now looking at me, while glancing back at the road every now and then.

"_Nothing"_ I blush knowing I got caught staring at him.

"_Whatever"_

I look out the window and notice that we are already there.

"_I think you broke a record_"

"_I'm always breaking records_"

"You. Are. A dork."

He pulls into a parking spot and shuts off the engine. I go to get out of the car but a hand on my knee stops me. I look at Paul his eyes are holding one emotion, concern.

"_Are you sure you want to do this? I mean Sam's right it's only been a couple of_-"

"_I didn't drive all the out here for nothing."_ I cut him off speaking a little more harshly then I should of.

"_I'm sorry. I just…I-I just really need to do this_" My voice is shaky and pleading.

Paul looks at me and gives my knee a squeeze. He gets out of the car and so do I. He meets me on my side.

"_So where to first?" _

"_I don't know. Let's just walk and we'll stop if we see something cool"_

We start walking and chat idly. All of a sudden I notice the place. I reach down and grab Paul's hand in my own. I need some reassurance I need his strength.

Paul looks at me and I look at him. He must have been able to get my message because he let go of my hand to put his arm around me shoulders pulling me closer to his warmth. He uses his left hand to grab my hand lacing our fingers together. And just for one fleeting thought I think this is how people in love embrace.

"_Get me away please."_

I try to back up but Paul pulls me with him to cross the street so we don't have to walk any closer to that alley than need be.

"_I thought I'd be strong enough to…you know...I don't know what I was thinking_"

"_Kassandra don't start trying to put yourself down. You have more strength than anyone for being able to return even within like 10 feet of this place. You have more strength than you know. You're just pushing it away until you're ready for that fire to come back. The fire that I know you have, the one that I love about you."_

"_Thank you Paul really. I just… thank you_."

"_Yea"_

It's quiet for a bit, both of us not needing to talk.

"_Just please don't tell the guys that I can have chick flick moments. You'll be feeding me to a pack of wolves."_

Just like that the silence is broken with both of us laughing. We just walk around Port Angeles for a while enjoying each other's company.

"_Oooo can we go in that store?!"_

"_Oh lord help me_"

"_Oh shut up. I'm not that bad"_

"_Every girl is bad"_

"_How do you know?"_

"I _know a lot of girls. Plus I know you and your probably the worst of them all."_

"_Yea… well you're bad_" _That's your comeback?_

"_What can I say baby I've always been bad."_ And there's that wolfish grin again.

"You so stole that line from something"

"_What? No I didn't" _

"_Yes you did_"

"_Prove it then"_

I couldn't really think of where I had heard that line before but I had. _I hate mind blanks_. I just stayed quiet and pull him into the store.

"Y_ea that's what I thought_"

I decide to just ignore him and start looking through the clothes. I come upon this gorgeous dress. It's a pink dress with black polka-dots. The dress was tight from the stomach up and the dress covered my chest and halters around the neck. The bottom flares out a little bit and it's short. _Sexy but classy I likey._

I look at Paul, with pleading guilty eyes. So maybe I am as bad as other girls. But I want to have some fun.

Paul just rolls his eyes and lightly pushes me towards the dressing room.

I go in to the room and try on my dress. _It fits like a glove_. It's perfect usually pink clashes with my hair but this doesn't. Instead it sets off my milky skin and green eyes.

I open the door and stick my head out looking for Paul. I see him leaning against the counter talking to the pretty blonde cashier, more like flirting. I roll my eyes. Typical it's like impossible for him not to flirt. _This will be fun_.

"Paul! Babe what do you think?" He looks over at me, with a -what the fuck- look. The girl looks back and forth from me to him. She looks at him before rolling her eyes and turning away from him.

He turns to look at her only to see her back. He pushes away from the counter and walks over to me with a very irritated look on his face. I just smile at him sweetly and put on my innocent eyes.

"_What was that?"_

"_I want you all to myself today_."

I let my lower lip form into a pout. Paul just started laughing and tapped my bottom lip.

"_Don't pout. I'm all yours today"_

"_Thank you. So you didn't answer my question what do you think?"_

Paul lets his eyes travel down my body. He lets a crooked smile come to his face before looking me in the eyes.

"_Gorgeous"_

"_Really?"_

"_Yea, go change, buy the dress and lets gooooo_"

I just laugh turning away from him to go back in the dressing room. I quickly change my clothes, placing the dress back on the hanger. I walk out of the dressing room and look at Paul leaning on the wall.

"_Okay I'm ready_"

I go pay for the dress while Paul waits by the door, obviously anxious to get out. The girl rings me and up, so I quickly pay before shooting her a smile. I walk over to Paul who opens the door for me and puts his arm around my shoulders once we're out on the sidewalk again.

I look towards the sky and notice that clouds have started to darken meaning rain. I look in front of me and see an empty playground.

"_Let's go over there_"

"_Fine_"

When we reach the playground I decide to sit on one of the sings and just lightly start to swing, just back and forth. The feeling of the wind on my face is really comforting. I guess my face had been heating up 'cause the wind feels like a bucket of ice.

I look over at Paul whose sitting on the swing next to me. His long legs are out in front of him, he's lightly moving making him swing back and forth as well. His arms are around the chains and his hands stuffed in his pockets. His voice shakes me out of my thoughts.

"_You gonna keep looking at me like that? Cause it's starting to make me wonder what's going through that mind of yours."_

"_I'm just happy you're here with me."_

"_I'm happy too."_

We both smile at each other now.

"_I saw everything about when Jacob found out, you know."_

"_Yea."_

I look back to the mulch that covers the playground. _Why mulch? Isn't that dangerous? What if it got in a kids eye?_

It's quiet but I hear Paul get up from the swing. Then his boots invade my vision of the ground and I feel the swing jerk, meaning he put his hands on the chains, trying to stop my swinging. I look up at him. I look in his eyes, his are searching mine, trying to see if he crossed a line. If anyone was looking at us from afar this would look romantic.

"_You wanna talk?"_

I sit there quiet for a bit before I stand up from the swing making him step back. I side kick my purse and shopping back closer to the pole, than start to walk towards the main jungle gym part.

"_I don't' know where to start. I mean how can something like this happen to me? I mean I know this happens to other girls too but I never thought it would be me. Haven't I suffered enough? First my parents, then I feel the rejection of an imprint, then I'm raped and I lose my baby? I just don't get it Paul. What the fuck did I do?"_

"_Nothing Kass you did nothing wrong. You know that right_? _This isn't your fault in any way._"

"_I keep hearing that but I can't help to wonder if it could have been prevented."_

I hear Paul let out a growl as I settle down at the top near the slides leaning against the bars. Paul sits across from me.

"_Maybe it could've if that stupid son of a bitch-"_

"_Paul."_

"_Sorry. I just it makes me so mad at how stupid he is."_

"_I know. Don't hate him, don't blame him. I already did that. I'm sure he's doing it to himself. I just need let everything work its way out. Go through life. I can't let this be my downfall."_

"_You won't. You're too good of a person. I mean how you forgave Jacob-"_

"_I haven't forgiven him."_

"_But you just said_"

"_Not to blame him, I blame him for ditching me for Bella, but I don't blame him for losing m-our baby. I never said I forgave him for the other stuff he's done to me."_

"_Good he doesn't deserve your forgiveness."_

"_He lost a baby too that day_. _You can't imagine the pain. Just stop being so hard on him Paul. I get your mad and you're defending me but it's between Jacob and I now._"

After I said that it's like a light bulb went off in my head. _OMG, he's feeling the loss too. He's hurting too. He's having to deal with this alone. At least I have Emily and Kim. He can't really talk to anyone right now. Has he talked to Billy? Has he talked to Embry, Quil, Sam?_

"_I've been so selfish. I need to be there for him."_

"_What do you mean?"_

"_Jacob's going through this he's alone_"

"_He's probably talked to leech lover." _I look at him when he says that and I watch as he realizes his mistake. _Has he talked to her? _

"_Kass I'm sorry it just slipped."_

"_I would have hoped for a boy." _I know Paul knows that I'm not mad at him for that.

"_A boy huh?"_

"_Yea I keep referring to a boy and he would have been the most handsome baby ever."_

"_With your genes probably yea." _Paul lets out a chuckle.

He moves over to sit next to me and puts his arm around me pulling me to his chest. He rests his chin on my head while I place my hand over his stomach.

"_Do you want to imprint?"_

"_I don't know not now I mean I'm 19, almost 20, stuck in a body that makes me look 25. I turn into a wolf. I hunt vampires….I think I wanna stay a bachelor for a while. I don't know if I want to do it sometimes."_

"_But eventually you want to right?"_

"_I guess. Although the best one is already taken." _Paul lets out a laugh and kisses my head. _Is he serious or joking?_

"_School starts soon you ready?"_

"_Fuck. I forgot, you're lucky Sam doesn't make you guys go. I don't want to go back. I can't face those other people."_

"_I know just think two more years and you'll be done."_

All of a sudden we hear a clap of thunder close by. No rain yet so that's a good sign.

"_Time to go"_

The two of us get up and walk back to the swing set to get my stuff. We try to walk fast back to the car but the rain starts drizzling, and next thing I know Paul's holding my hand running to the car. By the time we reach it I'm wet not soaked luckily 'cause it's raining a little more now but Paul's all dry. I shoot him a glare for this.

"_What?"_

"_Stupid Magical dog all dry and shit"_

Paul just laughs and starts the car. He turns on the heat for me,' cause I'm freezing We pull out of the parking space and make our way out of Port Angeles. My lips are chattering and I bring up my hands to blow air in them. Suddenly my hands are being held by a large warm hand. I look at Paul.

"_Don't want you freezing to death_."

"_Thanks."_

"_Yup."_

We both just sit quietly and I notice Paul's actually going a reasonable speed. I start to think of Paul and I's relationship I'm an over emotional girl right now and he's an angry werewolf. Not a good mix. _It's never gotten in the way before though. _

I wonder what Jacob's doing right now_. Don't think about him. Is it wrong that I'm kinda okay right now I still can't believe all of this though, it's almost like a nightmare, well it is. Funny how I chose to come back with the bad ass-_

"_Buffy."_

"_What?"_ Paul's voice holds a soft chuckle in it.

"_That line from earlier you got it from Buffy. Spike said it."_

Paul gets quiet at this and keeps his eyes on the road.

"_Oh my God you watch Buffy?!"_

"_Once or twice yea she's hot!"_

"_Oh of course"_

"_Hey, you are obsessed with FRIENDS"_

"_FRIENDS is way better than Buffy though_."

"_True_."

I turn back to look at the window and I notice that were already in La Push. We pull up to the house and Paul shuts off the car. It's still storming out. I look down at Paul's hand between my own. He must have noticed cause he lifts my hands to his face and gives a light kiss. I blush an intense red and drop my head which makes him smile.

Paul reaches into the back grabbing my purse and bags, and starts getting out of the car. I sit there for a second longer gathering what just happened. I open my door running up to the porch to meet Paul.

He hands me the bags and then my keys. I look at him for about minute before I reach out and hug him.

"_Thank you for today_"

"_I'd do it all over again"_

And with that he's gone running off to the woods. Just as he reaches the edge of the woods he turns to look back at me.

"_Hey Kass?"_

"_I'd do it for you."_

"_Do what?"_

Paul's response is to just turn and run into the woods making me lose sight of him. _What?_

* * *

><p><em>Thank you for pointing out that you didn't know who had said "I'd do it for you." and I know that it was confusing so I edited that for sure when I went back through. Paul said it, and he's referring to the fact that if he imprinted he would want it to be her. Romantic right?<br>_

_I'm sure Paul seems a little OC but he loves Kassie and they are best friends so he's going to be different with her. _

**_I don't own Twilight!_**

_Thank you for my reviewers! Please leave feedback _

_xoxo_


	9. It hurts

**It hurts**

It's been about 2 weeks since I went to Port Angeles with Paul. When I talked to Emily about everything that happened between Paul and I she didn't say anything but just smiled. On the other hand when I talked to Kim she got this huge smile on her face and started talking about how cute of a couple Paul and I would be. After that I shut up on the subject.

_I mean I don't think I'm ready for anything romantic. Would it be wrong for an imprint to date her non imprintee not only that but his pack brother too? Although it's not like Jacob is doing anything about it._

Speaking of Jacob we haven't really had a conversation since the day I went to Port Angeles. He's been around the house but we haven't really even said hello to one another just a nod. This might be a good thing, considering we don't have really anything to say. I still feel like I'm being a selfish cow for not being there for him, but I just need time, before I do that.

Today is now a Saturday I have 1 more week till summer break is over. After mentioning to Paul about not wanting to go back to I've convinced myself that's what I need to do, not go.

So now here I am standing in the middle of the living room with Sam and Emily on the couch looking at me anxiously.

_Get on with it. You're probably freaking them out, the look like there waiting for the verdict of a death sentence. _I kinda let a smile grace my lips.

"_So what is it you wanted to talk about?_" Sam's leg is starting to bounce so I know he's anxious to know what I have to say.

"_Okay right… so ummm... you know school is coming up and I.. I think it would be best if I didn't go back-"_

"_No absolutely not. You are getting an education."_ Sam leans back letting his arms stretch behind his head. Emily looks at me for a moment and then looks to Sam, then looks back.

"_Why don't you want to go back?"_ Emily's voice holds curiosity and concern. Thank the Heavens for Emily's rational mind.

"_Well I want to get an education I just don't want to go back to high school. I've been thinking about it. Now La Push doesn't really offer online classes but Forks has a program where I can sign up to get my GED."_

"_Why? You're telling us what you've researched but not why you want to do this?"_

"_I_ _just.. I don't want to go back there alone. The boys don't have to go and I don't want to face school and those people by myself. Please Sam."_

"_Kim's there don't you want to be there with her. I mean I know _-"

"_Sam, she has a valid point and who are we to pressure her into something she doesn't want to do? This makes her happy. Plus she said she'll sign up for classes to get her GED. So she will continue her education. I think this is a good idea._" Emily is giving Sam a stare-down, not a mean one a gentle one.

"_Fine. Find out everything we need to know, forms and all that."_ Sam still sounds a little hesitant about this but I'm getting what I want, of course that's thanks to Emily. _Imprint magic_

"_Super!"_

Sam gives me a smile before he gives Emily a kiss on her scarred cheek; this is his special good bye for her. Once I hear the back door close I look at Emily who rose from the couch.

"_Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!"_ I rush over to her and give her a hug, I'm slightly jumping up and down I'm so excited.

"_It's no problem, I knew in the back of my mind this would come up."_

"_I'm so excited. I can get my degree and move on to college…Oh poor Kim she'll be by herself_"

She lets out a little chuckle "_Kim's gonna be all over getting her GED now, even though it's her senior year_"

"_Okay I'm going up stairs to figure out more information."_ With that I turn around and skip up the stairs, going to my room and booting up my laptop.

I spend a few hours on the computer gathering information. I also look at my options for college. I think I'll start off with a Community College and then go from there. One thing I know is I'm going to study education so I can be a photographer.

I hear the door slam open down stairs with Jared, Quil and Embry's loud laughs. I don't really think anything of it till I hear Jared say.

"_Well the wolf's out of the bag!"_ He's laughing hysterically as he says this. Curious I go downstairs to see what he means. I reach the bottom of the stairs and slowly make my way to the kitchen.

"_Hey guys, What's going –"_

I stop mid-sentence because standing in the corner of the kitchen is a tall, gangly, brunette, doe eyed beauty. Bella.

"_Oh."_

Bella looks at me for a second before looking at Emily. She feels awkward, it's written all over her body stance. Emily gives her a smile before turning back to the oven, but she sends me a side glance saying "get over here"

I walk over to Emily and lean my back against the counter. She hands me a bowl of muffins to take to the table. I set the bowl in the middle of the table and immediately, three hands snatch muffins out. I slap their hands.

"_Leave some for your brothers. Pigs._"

I stay at the table leaning with on hand on a chair and another on my hip.

"_These are trade secrets! She runs with the vampires_." Jared's laughing while he says this but you can tell he's pissed.

"_You can't really run with vampires." _Everyone turns to look at her.

"_You know 'cause they're fast_"

I tense up at this. _Is she stupid don't compliment the leeches in front of a pack of wolves_. Although this will get interesting now and I can't say I hate it.

"_Yea? Well were faster. Freaked out yet?"_ She pushed Jared's buttons, but he won't do anything too nasty. I hear snorts coming from Embry and Quil, I look over at them and roll my eyes.

"_You guys aren't the first monsters I've met."_

_Monsters, they aren't monsters your leech boyfriend is. _

"_I wouldn't call them monsters. There are for sure worse creatures out there." _I couldn't help my tongue.

"_Jacobs right you are good with weird_." I jump in fright I didn't even hear him come in. He touches my shoulder before he moves over to Emily showering her with kisses, making her sequel in delight.

I let out a high pitched yelp as I feel an arm wrap around my waist and pull me into the chair I was leaning on. I hear a deep chuckle and the body behind me vibrates with it.

"_Chill babe I got ya._" _Babe? _

He reaches for a muffin and takes a giant bite out of it before he looks at Bella standing in the corner. With a big grin on his face he opens his mouth still full of food.

"_Oh, Sorry"_

I can tell it's sarcastic so I lightly slap his arm around my waist. He only squeezes me tighter. He starts to nuzzle, I can feel his grin on my shoulder. I know what he's doing so I can't help but let out a giggle.

"_Bella."_

I jump again, _God for giants they are quiet as a mouse. _I turn to see Jacob in the door way. His body is tense, his hands clenched at his sides, someone's pissed. I see Jacob glance at me and he stares at me in Paul's lap.

"_Jeez babe your jumpy today" Again with the babe. What is he up – oh._

"_Bella. Let's go."_ Jacob's voice is harsh but Bella walks over to him seeking refuge from his built body. _The body that belongs to me._ My eyes get wide at that. _Whoa. Girl easy._

"_Bye everyone."_ Bella's voice is quiet and everyone just gives a wave. She and Jacob leave the house with the slam of the front screen door.

"**JACOB! YOU BREAK THAT DOOR YOU BUILD A NEW ONE**!" Sam's alpha voice comes out

"_SORRY!"_

"_No he's not."_

With that comment Embry and Quil crack up laughing. I laugh along with them as they continue to joke back and forth.

I feel Paul nudge me from behind so I turn to glance at him. He nods his head towards the upstairs, indicating lets go. I stand up from his lap and start walking towards the stairs heading for my room. I can hear his loud footsteps following behind me. He shuts the door behind him making sure it clicks.

"_So I'm babe now?" _I lift one eye brow up.

"_Yea. Why don't like it?" _I know why he's really doing it so I just decide to change the subject

"_So you gonna tell me what happen or are we just gonna pretend nothing did_?"

"_What makes you think that I was involved_?"

"_Oh I don't know Paul maybe the fact that it's the "leech lover" that found out. How you showed up after Sam and before Jacob, not with Jared. I mean we know your temper you can't keep it controlled."_

I make sure to put air quotes around leech lover. My voice has a bit more edge to it than I meant. I can tell he wasn't expecting it because his face slowly drops.

"_I'm sorry I didn't mean to be mean. It's just- Why was she here?" _Paul smiles at me again.

"_Well your right I did have something to do with it. But she brought it on herself."_

"_What happened?"_

I move to sit on my desk chair, while Paul settles himself on my bed.

"_Well Jared, Quil, Embry, Sam and I went to go get Jacob to see if he wanted to go cliff diving. Bella comes stomping out of his house making her way towards us. She starts yelling at us asking what we did to Jacob. I just couldn't stand her accusing us so I snapped at her asking what Jacob told her. Sam's trying to calm me down, and then the bitch slapped me. I lost it I just saw red. As I was phasing, Jacob comes running out of the house and transforms midair jumping in front of Bella. He and I go at each other, and that's what happened. Oh and Jake and I broke Billy's boat._"

"_Well I don't blame you, I know you it's not your fault, she attacked first, it was instinct. Not like you were going to kill her_-" I hear Paul scoff at that and he lets a smile come to his face.

"_Paul!"_ I grab a pen and throw it at him while laughing.

Paul beckons me to move over to the bed. I move over and lay down cuddling into his side. We both sit in silence for a bit, his fingers are grazing up and down my arm, causing goose bumps to rise on my arm.

"_He's jealous you know."_ Paul's voice is quiet

"_What do you mean_?"

"_Jacob, he's_-"

"_What does he have to be jealous of? He's out there with perfect Barbie right now."_

"_Okay, 1) she's no Barbie. 2) He's jealous that you and I are getting closer._"

"_Oh. So that's explains the babe."_

"_The minute he phased his thought was on protecting Bella, but when we went at each other, the only thing he kept thinking about were the images of you and I leaving for Port Angeles. Among other things, that was just his imagination."_

I don't really know what to make of what he's saying

"_Does he have a reason to be jealous_?"

I start making circles on his chest. I reach one spot and he lets out a soft laugh and tries to wiggle away. I let out a few laughs of my own, just as soft.

"_Is someone ticklish?"_

"_A bit yea, it's a weak spot_"

Paul shifts to sit up a bit more so he's sitting against the headboard. He pulls me up along with him. I turn to look at him, he's not staring at me but I can see his eyes and I know a serious conversation is about to start. _Just wait for him to come to you; you know his ways this won't be easy for him to talk about. _

"_I think that Jacob does have something to be jealous about on my end at least."_ He turns to look at me he wants to know what I feel.

"_On my end too. I feel something there_."

He nods his head before looking forward again. He pulls me closer to him. I can't stand the silence, I want answers.

"_So…what now_?" _Maybe I do want so romance_

"_This is wrong. This is so very wrong_."

"_Why? Why is this wrong?"_ My voice starts to have an angry undertone, mostly because I had those same thoughts earlier and I had hoped it was just me. His head snaps to look at me.

"_You know why. I want you; I want to be with you. But let's be realistic, you're an imprint to my pack brother, no wait my pack beta_."

"_So what? He's in love with some other girl. He isn't acting on it_."

"_He's admitted that he loves you too_ _your marked territory, he claimed you_."

"_So now I'm just a piece of territory?_"

I pull away from him, breaking away from his hold.

"_No, no that's not what I meant! I meant that you're already imprinted on_-" I move off the bed and just look at him. He moves to sit at the edge of the bed now.

"_I just gave you reasons why it doesn't matter._"

"_If you would stop interrupting me."_

"_Sorry I have a nasty habit."_

"_Yea? Well break it."_

"_I'll work on it."_

"_Don't worry I'll help."_

He reaches out to grab my hand and pulls me back in front of him. Even with him sitting we're not eye to eye.

"_I. Can't. Imprint .on. you._" He runs a head through his hair making it a little messy. _Sexy._

"_I don't care. So what_?" Its right now that I realize I want this. _I want Paul. _

"_So what happens if we start a thing and I imprint on someone else. I can't stand watching him break your heart. I'm not a hypocrite I'm not going to do what he's done."_ _Oh._

I look at him just staring in his eyes. Be rational Kass, what he's saying is the truth. You could start and be happy, and then one look for him changes all of that. My eyes start to tear up and I step into his embrace hugging him around the waist nuzzling my head in his neck. I feel his arms wrap tightly around me and his chin rest on my head.

"_I get it." _

"_Kassandra, if things were different. If I wasn't a werewolf…"_

"_You'd still be Paul. We could have had a fling_"

"_No you, you would have been the one that lasts._"

"_I don't believe you. You'd leave your womanizing ways?"_

"_I'd do it now for you if I could."_

"_Another life, and a different time._"

We stand there for a few minutes then Paul starts to lean back on the bed dragging me with him. We assume the positions we had before.

"_I don't want you to end up angry and bitter." _I know what he's hinting at. _ .Leah_

"_I don't want this to change."_

"_We won't but we can't get any more attached than we already are." _

"_I do think I could love you Paul, more than a brother."_

"_And I you. But as we've seen the imprint always wins_."

"_Oh Paul who knew you could be so sensible and wise."_

"_Shut up"_

"_Do you really think the imprint wins over all?" _

Paul's quiet and I'm scared of what he thinks I meant.

"_Yes unfortunately_."

I just got rejected, yet I'm feeling content. I know there's more to come with this, I can't help but feel this is how it's supposed to be. Something happens in the future.

"_Don't you wanna know who kicked whose ass_?" I can't help but start to crack up. _Men and their egos_

"_Lemme guess it was you. The big bad Paul_"

"_Hell yea! Don't let Jake tell you different, he's just upset that he got his pride wounded."_

"_Okay I won't."_

I shoot up from where I'm lying on Paul so I'm sitting by his knees.

"_I got Sam to agree to me getting my GED! Well Emily did but still I don't have to go to school!"_

"_That's awesome! More time together! Booyah!"_ He also sits up bending one knee, and resting his arm on it while the other held him up.

"_I'm excited. I did research today so I found out that I have to go into Forks High School for two weeks, and then they can set me up online_."

"_WAIT! NO WAY IN HELL ARE YOU GOING THERE ALONE. NO DOES SAM KNOW THIS? I need to tell him_." He starts to move to get out of bed but I put a hand on his chest. Laughing a little bit.

"_They're gone Paul. Remember they ran away. They are long gone_."

"_Oh right._"

I start to laugh at him and he reaches over pulling me to him, messing up my hair.

"_Paul! Come on st-"_

I'm cut off by a howl in the woods. Paul and I both freeze and he begins to get up. We hear the back door slam open and many footsteps follow. We can hear murmuring it's a hard to hear with the door closed.

"_We should go see-"_

"_PACK MEETING EVERYONE LIVING ROOM NOW!" _

Sam yells in the loudest voice I've ever heard and from the way Paul's tensed up, he used alpha voice. Paul and I untangle ourselves, before we start for the stairs. We come to the bottom and I see everyone gathered around.

"_Kim?"_ I'm surprised to see her here.

"_Kass, Kim go to the kitchen with Emily. We'll call you back in a sec."_

Jared's reluctant to let Kim out of his arms, but one glare from Sam and he willingly nudges her to the kitchen. I feel Paul's hand land on the small of my back before he also nudges me. Kim and I meet in the doorway of the kitchen; before we enter we grab hands and share a glance. Something's going on, and it's bad.

Emily is standing at the stove but she's not doing anything. She's staring into the woods outside of the kitchen window. I rush over to her and lay my free hand over top of hers, she jumps a little meaning she's scared. All three of us move to the kitchen table and we just sit there in our own worlds.

"_Em, Kass, Kim. Can you come in here_?"

We look at each other before we get up and go to join the boys in the living room. Right as I see their faces I know this is worse than bad this is this is… _wait where's Jacob?_

Jacob's not sitting around the living room. Kim goes back to Jared and cuddles in his lap. Emily goes to Sam, they both just stand in the middle. I stay near the door way after getting a head shake from Paul. He's standing on the opposite side of the room, close to the front door, and he's shaking.

"_We caught a scent today, when we followed the trail we were led to a female obviously vampire. She slipped through our grasp, jumping the treaty line last minute. She's fast_."

Sam pauses for a minute and grabs Emily closer into his embrace. Emily looks up at him, I know she'll ask the question us girls are thinking but won't ask cause of Sam's patience.

"_So we are going to be on lock down till you catch her?"_

"_Yes. You will be around one of us no matter what. Your safety comes first_."

"_Okay, why would she be here though? The Cullen's left."_

"_We have no clue. A few weeks ago we found another vampire_-"

"_Oh yea the one with the dreads. Cool hair too bad-"_Quil shuts his mouth once he realizes that everyone's glaring at him. He shrinks into the couch and mutters a small "_Sorry"_

"_We found another vampire, we got him. He was about to attack Bella. We have reason to believe that they could be connected. We have now way of really finding out because our only informants have left.-"_

Sam's cut off by the back door slamming open; the pack starts to get in defensive positions. I'm the one closest to the door I try to move away but the intruder is reveled to be Jacob. A very frazzled looking Jacob.

"_Where's Kassandra?"_ Jacob seems to be so frantic that he can't even see me right next to him.

"_Right here."_ I make sure to give a wave for extra effect.

Jacob comes over to me and hugs me. I can't help but hug him back, feeling safe in his arms right now. He brings one hand up to the back of my head and lets his fingers tangle in my hair. I can hear him smelling my hair. I pull back from him and look in his eyes. Something has him spooked.

Jacob pulls away but leaves one arm around me, keeping me close to him. _He's protecting me_. I can't help but just a little giddy at this thought. _Yet you were just with Paul. _Just that thought makes me flinch.

"_I have information_"

"_We do too"_

"_Mines important. I went to drop Bella off when I caught a faded scent, vampire. I told Bella, and she let it slip that it could be this female vampire who is looking for revenge on Edward. He killed her mate. Bella said she's got –"_

"_Red hair, tall, and extremely fast? Yea we know."_

"_Yea and- wait what? You saw her?"_

"_We chased her, she crossed the treaty line_."

"_Well she's not in Forks I checked the surrounding area and couldn't catch a fresh scent. She's gone. My guess would be just north in Canada."_

"_Thank you Jacob. This is good news, she's gone for now. We'll double up on patrols. We need to keep the tribe safe, from these monsters. Someone will be posted around the girls at all times. Understood?"_

The pack agreed with what Sam said. Jacobs arm pulls me tighter to him I look up at him and he just stares right back. He looks away though and says something that breaks our moment.

"_We need to patrol around Bella's house too." _I move myself out of his grasp and step to the side. I bring my arms up so I'm hugging myself.

"_The hell we do. Her house is out of the way. She's not part of the tribe and most importantly she's not one of our girls." _I know Paul pissed he doesn't want anything to do with her. I go to walk over to him but Jacob grabs my wrist keeping me in place.

"_Shut up Paul. Put your- "_

"_Paul, Jacob and I will take the first patrol tonight. The rest of you be on alert. Jared I assume you'll stay here with the girls." _

I have to wonder if Sam picked them three to have a private talk with them.

"_Yes"_

"_Alright let's go"_

Sam and Emily share a passionate embrace. I watch as Paul makes his way to the back door not looking in my direction. I pull my wrist from Jacobs grasp and follow behind him. I grab his arm stalling him and he turns around.

"_Paul. Please, Please be careful. Don't do anything rash, if you see her._"

My eyes must show how worried how I am so Paul pulls me into to his arms wrapping me in a warm cage. I see Sam move out the back door, no Jacob yet.

"_I'll be careful. I promise. I'll see you later."_

He whispers into my ear, before he pulls back and with one last look he goes out the back door. I turn around and I see Jacob standing in the door way of the kitchen. His face looks torn, his shoulders are slumped forward, and his eyes cast down.

"_Jacob"_ I whisper his name before I can stop myself.

Jacob's eyes shoot up to meet mine and he starts walking toward me. He stops right in front of me, unsure of how to handle me at the moment.

"_Jacob, I need you to be careful. Watch out for yourself and your brothers. I need you all to come back to me, to us."_

I step forward and hug Jacob around his waist my head rests on the lower part of his chest. Our height difference is even more than Paul and I.

"_I'll be back. And I promise I'll bring them back as well. Safe and sound."_ His voice is firm.

"_Jacob I'm sorry."_

"_About what?" _

"_Later okay?"_

"_Yea later."_

"_Be safe!" _

I pull back out of his embrace and watch as he walks out the back door.

"_Kassandra, lock the door."_ Emily's voice sounds behind me.

After I shut and lock the door I turn around to see her and Kim standing in the kitchen.

"_Where's Jared?"_

"_On the couch, I told him to get some sleep. Although I know he's just gonna rest."_ Kim's voice is sort of shaky.

"_Let's go upstairs._"

"_Shouldn't we stay down here?"_ I know Kim's voice is trying to be calm but she's beyond nervous.

One look from Emily though and the three of us go upstairs. Emily breaks off going to her bedroom to change and get Kim something to sleep in, since I'm shorter than them my clothes are too small.

Kim and I head into my room and we sit on the bed, in silence. Emily comes in and hands some clothes to Kim, just as she's about to walk out the door a loud howl sounds, it's a sorrowful one though. Not like the other one, earlier. Kim looks at me before going to the bathroom.

"_Kass. Come help me grab something."_

"_Okay_"

Emily opens the closet door and pulls out a box for an air mattress.

"_When did we get one of these?"_

"_Awhile back, thought it would be a good idea_."

The two of us lift the box and carry it to my room laying it in the middle and starting to pump it up. When Kim come's back, we all just stand there in silence watching till the air mattress is full. Kim goes and sits down once Emily turns it off, it's a queen size.

"_How does this fit in here_?" I ask amazed that this fits in my small room.

"_No idea but were lucky it does. Sam told me he wants us to sleep in one room."_

"_Alright."_

Emily sits down on the air mattress. The three of us sit there in a silence that is just so tense, it makes me feel closed in.

"_Okay. I can't take it, what is going on with you and Paul? I mean the two of you were up here for a long time."_ Emily's voice is light; she's trying to take away the tension.

"_You guys were alone in your room?"_ Kim's voice gets excited and we all sit down for a story time.

"_It's not like that. We confessed that we would love more than anything to be able to start something, but it's the wrong time and place. I didn't like the outcome at first but he reasoned with me."_

"_Oh"_ Kim's face falls and Emily's' turn sympathetic.

"_Well he brought up that what if we did start something and he imprinted? He doesn't want to hurt me and I hate to say I agree with his reasoning." _

"_That does make sense. I just thought that you two would be so great together, we could've double dated." _

"_Hey, what about Sam and I?"_ Emily doesn't sound offended just joking around.

"_You two are always invited to come a long_!" Kim recovers her tracks.

"_Yea, I would have liked it too Kimmy, I would have loved it. Can we not talk about it right now? I just it's a lot and the rejection."_

"_Okay hun that's perfectly fine."_ Emily knows I'm hurting right now, give it a few days and it'll be better.

The three of us stay up to talk a bit more and eventually Kim falls asleep. Emily and I both decide to turn in, after I turn off the light, I go get settled in my bed.

"_Emily?"_ I whisper

"_Yea?"_ I hear her rustle on the air mattress being gentle not to wake Kim.

"_Is it wrong to love Paul, and love Jacob? Am I wrong for loving two people at once?"_

"_Hunny, your heart is a big place. You can love as many people as you desire. It's the one who holds your heart that matters. As for two people no you're not wrong. You remember the whole Sam and Leah situation?"_

"_Yes…"_ _Where is she going with this, we never talk about this, it's off limits_.

"_Sam still loves Leah deep down. He feels guilty all the time for that, he hates to talk about it. It's close to the same situation for you hun. You love Paul and you always will but Jacob is your imprint, your soul mate and deep down you know that. Even If you two don't end up together it's always the imprint who owns your heart. I know you're confused by what you feel but Kassandra don't let it consume your mind." _

"_It hurts, so bad when he's gone."_

"_I know hon. I know but be patient. Also remember there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone." _

After that I don't answer I just will myself to sleep my mind plagued by two men, two wolves out there tracking a vampire. _Man this is a weird world._

I fall asleep to the sound of three wolves howling in the woods.

* * *

><p><em>Super long chapter, and Victoria has finally made herself known, I could never leave her out. <em>

_I don't own Twilight _

_Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and read this! I hope you like it_

_xoxo_


	10. Kiss

_**Kiss. **_

It's been about a month since the pack caught scent of that vampire. WOW time can fly by. The boys have all been tense but we are all trying to keep on with our lives.

I can see the effects of doubling patrols have had on the boys. Paul is constantly moody; his lack of sleep is making him more on edge than ever. Sam is stressed beyond belief, but he's trying to keep it at bay for the rest of the pack. Quil and Embry surprisingly seem unfazed; they don't have too much other stuff to stress about so their sleep is deep. According to Kim Jared's always sneaking in to her room when he can and just sleeping there. Jacob's been around more, his moods are rivaling Paul's, but Paul still holds first place for that.

Unfortunately with Jacob being around more often, and the vampire threat, Bella is here a lot more. It's getting easier for her to be around, at first everyone was hesitant to let her come around considering the vampire is after her, but Jacob somehow convinced the pack they have to protect her too, she is human after all. I tend to avoid her when she's around, retreating to my room while she's downstairs with the guys.

On a better note school started! I had to go into Forks High School to get an orientation for the online GED classes, of course Paul went with me. So far I have an assignment due every week and it takes up to six months before I can take the test, and graduate. Usually when I'm working if Paul's off patrol he'll be in my room sleeping. My pillow has started to have Paul's scent every night. Not that I mind.

Paul and I haven't brought up the day we decided to not go for a relationship but our bond is now stronger, because everything is in the open now. Paul continues to say that Jacob is jealous though and I always say that I don't care. _Do I? _

Right now Paul and I are sitting in my room while I work on my computer trying to understand my current assignment.

"_How's the assignment going? Making any progress?"_

"_Not since the last time you asked me five minutes ago."_

"_Oh. Want me to take a look at it?"_

"_Are you serious? Paul you hate school!"_

Paul comes over scoots me from my seat so he can sit down, but I stay behind him still looking at the assignment.

"_It's the thought that counts."_

"_Well than thank you. When's your next patrol?"_

"_Late tonight."_

"_Will you be coming by afterwards?"_

"_Do you want me to?"_

"_Yes idiot, I would've of thought me asking would be the answer."_

"_Okay I'll be here. Leave the window unlocked this time not cracked."_

"_Why?"_

"_Because I don't feel safe with you leaving the window open, if the leech slips by somehow she'll follow our scent, the house is a hot spot, with all of your scents. Then your window is right open for her to see. God Think Kass Think._" His voice seems condescending with no joking.

"_No need to get snippy"_

"_Sorry."_ Paul doesn't look away from the computer at all, but I can see his posture is tense. I know he's not thinking about the assignment anymore.

"_Not like a closed window will stop a vampire._" I mutter, somewhat sarcastically, under my breath. _Oh I didn't mean to say that_, _bad…bad..bad_. _I really curse my mouth._

Paul's head turns to the side to look at me, and his face is scrunched up in anger.

"_Your damn right. Nothing will stop a vampire, unless one of us wolves rips is to shreds. Your window locked, closed, open wouldn't stop one from entering your room and sucking you dry. "_

He's now fully turned around in the chair facing me and I backed away from him knowing right now anything could set the ticking time bomb off.

"_Paul you're taking it out of context I just meant that even if my window is closed, but unlocked there's no difference between it being cracked." _

Paul looks at me, his face slowly relaxing.

"_Kassie you can be so damn oblivious sometimes. If it's closed it at least gives the illusion that it's locked. Making me feel like there is a chance it tricks her. It's just with everything happening right now it's just this vampire bitch. We can smell her but she leads us in different directions. She's getting braver though."_ Paul's voice sounds tired and worn out.

"_Okay ouch. Moving on though I'm surprised that no one else has phased what with the activity going on. Doesn't that trigger something?"_

"_Yea Sam's predicting some will phase soon. It's a little weird though that she hasn't tried to hurt anyone."_

"_Don't forget Paul her target is to hurt one person, Bella. My guess is she's getting a feel for what you wolves are like. Seeing if you're a threat like the Cullen's were_."

"_We are an even bigger threat for that stupid leech coven... Anyways back to the assignment. Sam doesn't want you ladies to know too much."_

"_Why?"_

"_Don't know to protect you, he knows you'd worry. He wants to keep you guys less involved as he can. I have to say I agree with him."_

"_I don't, I think it would be best if we knew what the hell was going on, but not my decision."_

Paul turns back around looking at the assignment once again. I come and rest my hands on his shoulder starting to lightly massage his tense muscles. I look at my hands on his shoulders, and can't help but laugh at how small my hands look.

"_What's so funny?"_

"_My hands look so teeny on your back."_

"_Well what did you expect? I'm like 6'7 and your 5'2. Big difference babe."_ He turns around to face me.

"_I know. I know it's just seeing it right now is just funny_" I let a few more giggles escape my mouth.

"_Whatever you say, beautiful._"

I blush which makes Paul let out loud laughter. After he calms, he lets out a big obnoxiously loud yawn.

"_Go rest. You'll need it for later"_

"_Okay, but you're resting with me."_

With that Paul stands up and grabs my hand pulling me towards the bed with him. He lays down first and then pulls me down, so I'm cuddled in his side. _See nothing's changed Kass, in fact you guys are closer than ever. Just no attachments. He's right I would be crushed if he imprinted while with me. _

Paul and I just lay there in silence both in a light sleep. I'm woken up by the door opening down stairs along with Embry and Quil's voices shouting their 'Hellos'. I move closer to Paul trying to hopefully go into a deeper sleep, but I feel him tense up.

"_What is it?"_ I make sure to whisper, usually I don't bother knowing they can hear everything. However with all the noise going on I bet the quieter I am the less they hear.

"_Why does she have to come around? It's bad enough that we have to double patrols and detour to her house so we can protect her. Why does she have to come where she's not welcome?"_

I know exactly who he is talking about. Paul hasn't tried to hide the fact that he doesn't like her here. The only one who really snaps at him to stop being mean is Jacob and every now and then Sam, when Paul gets close to crossing the line. Embry and Quil are okay with her coming around of course they are Jacob's best friends. Jared doesn't want her around, especially if Kim's over, but he'll talk to her if everyone is in on the conversation. Sam I know doesn't want her around as much as she has been, but that's just because he knows how I feel, other than that he's polite to her. Emily of course is always the kind hostess and tries to include Bella, but Emily isn't the same warm self she usually is. Emily will always have my back though. Lastly Kim being the loyal best friend doesn't like her, she usually just ignores her.

"_Paul, she knows the secret, she's the one the vampire is after, she needs to be protected. Plus-"_

"_Then let Jacob run around her house in circles, with his tail between his legs. Looking like a little lost dog with nowhere to go. "_ Paul's voice has turned into a harsh whisper and I swear I hear him let out a growl.

We both hear the sound of the back door open, along with Jacob's voice. Of course his delightful voice is directed at one person. I hear what sounds like feet running out the door, more like a stampede.

"_Quil just left, idiots late for patrol."_

"_That was just Quil?"_ I can't help but laugh at how loud these boys can be, yet so quiet other times.

"_Yea."_

"_Back to sleep we go."_

I am perfectly fine with that. I can't go downstairs where Jacob and Bella will be together. Jacob won't leave so they are going to stay for a bit. I feel myself start to slip into darkness.

"_Do you like her?"_

"_Paul, I thought we were going back to sleep_."

"_I'm just asking. I mean sometimes when I come by after patrol and you two are sitting at the table being civil. Yet other times she comes through the door and you flee to your room."_

"_She's fine. She's a nice girl, it's not her fault. Sometimes it's easier to blame her though. I guess I at least try to be nice I mean she's walking into a tight packed family and she's gotta feel left out. It sometimes feels better to blame her but I can't do that."_

"_Of course, why can't you just be a normal girl, be catty and hate her?"_

"_So I can be on your side all the time you get told off? I don't know Paul I'm trying to be a good person."_

"_You are too nice, just bitch slap her"_

Paul makes a motion with his hands and I just bust out laughing at that part. I sit up so I'm looking down at him. I'm laughing so hard I have to grab my side. The laughter is contagious and Paul joins in.

"_The….way you…said that…. Oh Gosh…. Hilarious"_ I'm able to get that out between my laughs. Paul calms down to just wearing a wide smile.

"_I haven't heard you laugh that hard since…. well you know."_

"_I know_"

I calm down and just smile at Paul. We just sit there for a few seconds, and before I know it Paul's leaned up and placed his lips on mine. His hand comes up to hold one of my cheeks. I grab his hand where it lays and slowly trace it down his arm. We don't go any further, both just content with the feel of each other's lips.

"_Hey Emily sen_-"

We pull apart practically shoving the other away and look at the door to see Jacob standing there. Not only does time feel like time freezes and bad tension is flowing all around the room. Nobody makes a move, I'm too nervous, but I have to look at Jacob. His face says he's pissed, but his eyes hold a whole lot of hurt. Jacob turns around and just walks right back down stairs.

"_They're a little busy at the moment."_ Jacob's voice is loud and spiteful.

It gets quiet downstairs, and still in my room Paul and I haven't moved.

"_Soo Jake wanna play on the Xbox?"_ Embry's trying to get a conversation open.

"_No Embry, not really."_

"_Okkkayyy… Hey Em what are you cooking tonight"_

"_W-what do you guys want?"_ Emily's voice is a little shaky

She's nervous knowing he must of walked in on something. I finally let out a sigh that's the ice breaker. I open my eyes and turn to look at Paul, he's looking right back at me. He lets out a sigh before he moves back and leans his back on the headboard.

"_Shit." _

"_What?"_ I look at Paul a little confused.

"_Jake's gonna be pissed. Oh this isn't going to be good."_

I look to the door, a little pissed that Paul is acting like we have to walk on eggshells around Jacob. Sure I feel guilty but Jacob can grow a pair and get over it. I raise my voice a little so Embry and Jacob can hear but not Emily or Bella.

"_No you know what. It was good; in fact it was very very good-_"

Paul gives me a look as if to say "stop it" and I hear a loud growl coming from downstairs. I choose to ignore the growl.

"_Don't give me that look. Jacob can grow up and get over his damn self. He has no right to even think about being pissed about you and me-"_

"_You're his imprint."_ Paul is speaking through his teeth. He doesn't want to make it any worse. I think he's trying to redeem himself with Jacob by stating that fact.

"_Oh yea, because that's proved to mean anything to him. He parades around the leech lover and I don't even get to have what's supposed to be a private moment with you. Without him being a complete jerk. I hate this, I hate that I have to be on the bad end of this. Fuck him. I-_ "

Paul cuts me off by placing his lips on mine. I pull away wanting to continue my rant, but Paul keeps me right there. I know what he's doing and I can't help but smile against his lips causing him to laugh.

"_I don't regret what just happened either. But I'm not a girl Kass I don't do drama."_ Paul whispers, and I'm not sure if Jacob can hear him.

"_Plus I thought we agreed…" _

"_Nothing can happen. Yea I know."_

"_Exactly, so maybe we should-"_

"_Don't even. Don't even think about making me lose you too."_ I start to panic.

One rejection from a guy hurts but two Oh lord help me. The whole situation is just too much. Too fucked up.

"_You wouldn't lose me"_

"_Yes I would. You would pull away trying to be the good guy, which totally doesn't fit you cause I like the bad boy."_

Paul gets up from the bed and heads over to the door, I think he's just gonna walk away and a few tears leak and I can't help the sob that escapes my lips. _No not here_. Instead he closes the door and locks it. _He knows about the magic door now too. _He comes back and resumes his position on the bed. _Oh god now you're really going emotional_

"_Can I say something and you not interrupt_" I give him a nod and grab a spare pillow pulling it into my now crossed legs.

"_We went over this already. We can't let anything happen, I won't be the one to hurt you. I'm not going to be like him. I can hurt other girls no problem, but not you, never you. Maybe if we take a step back from one another, what we feel will slowly die down."_

I continue to stare down at the pillow not making any move; my tears are still slowly falling.

"_Paul… please don't pull away. I'd rather love you and nothing happen rather than let the feelings die down and you step away. Paul you've saved me from going insane. Why do you think I took you to Port Angeles? I could have taken Sam, but I wanted you because you've protected me. If it was anyone else who tried to make a move I don't think I would have kept it together. Please don't walk away now. Plus "when the fire dies you think it's over but it's just begun."_

I slowly lift my face to look at Paul. He stares right back at me before he reaches out and uses his thumbs to wipe away my tears. He pulls me closer to him so I'm lying on my chest.

"_I won't leave you. I promise_"

He gives me a reassuring squeeze and just continues to hold me, while my tears finally stop.

"_By the way nice job quoting Avenged Sevenfold."_ He lets out a laugh.

"_Hey anything that passes Matt Sanders lips is amazing. Plus those are wise words they write" I_ defend my favorite band, keeping a smile on my face.

"_He's still gonna try and kill me."_

"_No he won't. Plus if he does I'll rip him a new one. "_

I look out the window seeing that the sun has started to set. I continue to watch out the window with Paul just holding me.

"_Your assignment is a piece of shit by the way, impossible to figure out."_ We both laugh at his comment.

One of the many things I love about him he can't stand having a deep serious conversation. He counters me I'm too deep and emotional.

"_You didn't even look. I'll figure out a way to just do it."_

"_Just. Do. It"_ Paul says this in a really deep mocking voice, making me smile.

"You're a nerd Paul"

We fall into a small conversation about nothing in particular, just passing time till he has to go patrol.

"_Alright, get up I gotta go on patrol."_

"_Dun…Dun….Dunnnn"_

"_What was that for?"_

"_Jacob is still downstairs."_

"_Okay I'm going through the window."_

Paul starts to climb over my bed to get to the window but I grab his arm pulling him back.

"_No if I have to go down and face the music so do you."_

"_Just stay up here all night that way neither of us do." _Paul has a huge smile on his face thinking he's a genius.

"_No let's go together."_

I get up and go to look in the new full length mirror. My hair is in a loose side pony tail, make up smudged around my eyes.

"_It's gonna get cold later"_

Paul appears behind me with my favorite hoodie sweatshirt and socks. I grab it and put it on over my cami.

"Thanks"

I raise my hands to my face trying to remove any evidence that I've been crying. I'm able to fix myself up slightly. My eyes are still a little red but oh well. My feet are now covered with yellow smiley faces wearing mustaches.

"_What is it you have?"_

"_Raynaud's, I'm pretty sure"_

"_Not gonna lie it's a bit weird."_

"_Oh trust me I know. You should see a bad night my teeth chatter like those old people teeth that you always see-"_ Paul just starts laughing

"_In the movies. Next time that happens make sure I'm around I gotta it."_

"_Shut up! And you have been here when it happens your just asleep_. "

Paul just slings his arm over my shoulder and we make our way to the door. I try to open it but it won't budge. _Oh right it's locked._ I unlock it hoping Paul didn't really notice.

"_Smooth"_

I just nudge him with my elbow, which only makes my funny bone act up. When we get downstairs I see Embry in the living room playing Xbox, I think that's Call of duty. I don't know they are all the same to me. Embry doesn't take his eyes away from the screen.

Before Paul and I enter the kitchen Paul takes his arm away from my shoulders, grabs my hand moving in front of me so he enters before me. I squeeze his hand as a silent thank you. I see Jacob and Bella talking while hovering over at what looks like school books.

"_Hey Emily what are you making?" _

"_Spaghetti, with chili to top it off, oh and corn bread." _

"_Fuck!"_ Paul decides to exclaim very loudly. I see Bella and Jacob look up, Bella seems a little startled at the outburst, and I guess Jacobs till pissed since he barely looks up.

"_Chill out Paul, you'll have left overs." _

"_But it's never good as left overs" I let out a laugh. Paul you're gonna get it_

"_Paul Lahote did I hear you just say that my cooking tastes bad as leftover's?" _

I hear Embry make an "OOOOOO" sound.

"_NO! NO! Em, your foods the best in fact you are the queen of cooking, I will get down on my knees and beg-"_

"_Like a dog?_" Paul shoots a glare at me.

"_Would you just shh." _

Paul quickly moves over to Emily to give her a gigantic hug and spins her around, making Emily let out a squeal of surprise. Once he sets her back down she lightly taps him with her cooking spoon.

"_Go on you big baboon before Sam comes looking for you_." Emily is still laughing, and Paul just grins.

"_Sam coming to look for Paul like an owner looking for a lost puppy. Cute!_"

I really don't know where these comments are coming from but I'm happy right now. Paul whips around so fast to face me and has this little glint in his eyes. _I should have known not to say that after the other comment. Damn it Kassandra you are so-_

"_Hey! You don't get to make comments, when you cook a decent meal, than you can. Got it missy."_

Paul keeps walking towards me with his finger pointed. I finally start backing up there is still the kitchen counter between us.

"_Why so you can sit at my side begging-"_

"_That's it."_

Paul starts to run around the counter but I'm already shooting off towards the living room to get out the door. I turn the knob but the door doesn't budge. _Oh yea of all times to be locked. _I can hear Paul getting closer I turn to look and he's right there, not realizing that I'm not out the door yet. On impulse I move out of the way, and that's when it happens. Paul goes crashing through the door ripping it off the hinges. With his wolf abilities he's able to catch himself but it's too late.

Paul looks at the door with wide eyes. I stare at Paul, trying so hard not to laugh along with Embry right now. I can hear everyone running out of the kitchen to see what happened.

"_PAUL!"_

"_IT'S NOT MY FAULT! She moved out of the way!"_

" _You really wanted to take me down with you?"_

"_NO! Instead I would have stopped but you moved."_

"You're making no sense."

"PAUL. WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST DO?"

We all look over to see Sam emerging from the woods. He doesn't look happy. Now I really can't keep the laughter in, the only one who joins in is Embry. I look around behind me Emily is just shaking her head but has a smile, Bella looks completely shocked, and Jacob is staring at me. _What?_

"_Embry get one of the extra doors out of the shed. Paul get on patrol. Now!"_

The boys start to get into action but I step out to get close to Paul.

"_You owe me."_

"_Okay, a dinner?"_

"_Yes you cook. Remember window closed, unlocked but closed." _

"_Get outta here caveman"_

I give Paul a hug and for good measure I lift myself on my tippy toes and give him a chaste kiss. I watch him run into the woods before I turn back to the house and see Embry already working on the door. I shake my head, and head back inside.

* * *

><p><em>Well well well finally the two lovebirds kissed, but unfortunately were interrupted. <em>

_I'm trying to write Kassie with more fire, and more lightness, I think she's ready to start moving on, she's still hurt and it'll be along progress but at least she's starting. _

_I don't own twilight!_

_Thank you_

_xoxo_


	11. Commas

**Commas (Downer)**

"_Well Kassandra thank you for sharing all of this with me. Unfortunately our time is up. I'm going to go get Sam and Emily"_ I give the brunette doctor a nod. _That felt relieving._ I look up when the door opens up again and the psychologist returns with Sam and Emily following.

_"Please have a seat."_ Sam sits to my left and Emily sits to my right, I grab her hand seeking for anything familiar. I feel Sam's arm go around the back of the couch we're sitting on I lean my head further back.

"_Now usually I would have Kassandra leave the room, but I think it would be okay if you stayed. I'm going to leave that up to Kassandra."_

I think about this for a minute. _Do I want to know what this lady says about me? No. Yes. Yes I do I should be allowed to hear this straight forward._

"_I'll stay_." Emily gives my hand a squeeze.

_"Okay"_

_"Well Mr. Uley-"_

_"Sam, please call me Sam_." The lady looks at Sam before nodding and turns her gaze to Emily.

"_Please call me Emily."_ I shoot a smile to the psychologist, I told you they would insist. She shoots me a smile back. I like this lady she's nice.

"_Well Sam and Emily, let me just say what a wonderful job you have done with her after taking her in and helping her after her father and mother."_

"_Thank you_" Both Sam and Emily smile.

"_Now since this our first session I can't give a full report on Kassandra but I'm very certain that she is suffering Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Kassandra has been through a lot recently. I'm surprised she's been able to hold on this long."_

"_Yes she is a very strong girl_." I turn my head to smile at Sam.

_"With Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD, it's likely the cause for Kassandra's emotions being up and down. With Kassandra's father dying, her mom leaving, and of course the incident a few months ago it's all normal for her to react like this. Now of course other disorders can come hand in hand with PTSD_"

"_Like what?" _

_"Depression, Anxiety, Bipolar Disorder are the usual ones. I can't say for sure yet if Kassandra has either of those. It does seem that she has some anxiety from what she's told, me and of course the nightmares. I'm asking Kassandra to keep a journal for when she is feeling overwhelmed, and then she can bring it back here to read as much as she likes to me. I'm going to ask you Emily and Sam, to observe her and if you notice anything that bothers you, please report back to me."_

_"Of course." _

_"Great. Now when would you like your next appointment Kassandra?"_

_"Two weeks."_

After making the appointment, we left her office. We walked to Sam's pick- up truck; I opened the door letting Emily in first. I want window seat. Once we're all settled in safely Sam pulls out.

_"How was it?"_

_"I liked it better than I thought I would."_

_"Good I'm glad."_

"_So you have nightmares? Why haven't we noticed?_

"_Paul he helps with them."_

We sit in more silence, not awkward but I don't want it to be quiet right now.

_"Can you turn on the radio please?"_

_"What do you want to listen to?"_

_"Whatever is on."_

Once the radio is on, I tune out leaning against the window watching the rain on the window. _Thank you Paul._

*Three Weeks ago*

I woke up to the sound of rain pitter pattering on the window. I feel hot, warmer than I should. _Jacob? No, he left last night._

It's Paul, I turn to look at him, his mouth is open slightly drooling, and snoring. I do love watching him sleep its cute. I decide it's time to get up so I gently climb over Paul's sleeping form to go get a shower. I try to be careful of my foot. Once I grab some clothes for today I open my door and close it behind me. When I turn around I bump into a big figure, I look up to meet his eyes.

"_Good morning Sam"_

_"Why's he been sleeping here?"_

_"I asked him to come over last night."_

_"I mean the other nights as well Kassandra"_

_"How did- right wolf. Why didn't you say anything?"_

_"I figure you had your reasons, but last night walking up here with Paul, was kind of weird so I needed to know,' cause he wouldn't say anything."_

_"Paul knew you knew?"_

_"Yes. Now would you like to explain to me?"_

_"Downstairs?"_

Sam moves to let me past him, so I can go downstairs first. When I go to the kitchen I notice Emily isn't there. I turn to ask Sam.

_"I told her to sleep in."_ _Ahh okay._ I set my clothes on the table making sure my undergarment's are hidden from Sam. Sam and I sit down next to each other at the table.

_"He protects me. With Paul being there I'm not terrified I feel safe and I feel wanted. He accidently fell asleep one night after a patrol and I realized that I hadn't slept that good in a long time. Even before…the incident. I asked him to come back and he agreed, well I more like begged him. I'm sorry Sam I shouldn't of-"_

_"You have no reason to be sorry. If Paul makes you feel safe then I want him to be here."_

_"Really?"_

_"Yes."_ I lean over to hug Sam and we just sit like that for a bit.

"_I mean you help me feel safe too but I think it'd be more than a little awkward if I asked you to sleep with me at night."_

That makes Sam and I both start laughing.

_"Go finish whatever you were doing. I'll be here when you come down."_

_"Thank you."_

With that I head upstairs going into the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I do my usual shower routine, when I step out of the shower I wipe across the mirror so I can see my reflection. Skip makeup today. I brush my teeth, and put on lotion. As I'm letting my hair loose from the towel, I hear Paul yell.

_"DAMMIT SAM!"_

I can hear Sam's booming laughter, and I smile. What are they up to now? I walk out of the bathroom, I see Emily at the bottom of the stairs looking up curiously. Turning my head in the direction that the laughter is coming from. My door's open and I can see two figures in there.

_"What happned?" _Paul is on the floor and he looks soaked but he's quickly drying off due to extreme body temperature. Then I see that there's Sam standing with a bucket in his hand.

_"Asshole over here rolled me off the bed and then poured water on me."_ I can't help but laugh at Paul's face.

"_Well as long as you're sleeping in my house I get to mess with you as much as I want. Get up Ems got food."_

With that Sam leaves the room. I continue to giggle trying to stifle it behind my hand.

"_You think this is funny?"_ Paul's acting like he's mad but I know he's not. I shake my head at him while laughing.

"_Yea yea laugh all you want. You wait I'll get you back."_

_"I didn't do anything. Sam did."_ My giggles are subsiding.

_"I know I'll be getting him too_." I just roll my eyes and start walking back to the bathroom.

"_Why are you walking on the tiptoes of your foot?"_

_"Long story. Come in the bathroom and I'll tell you_."

Once Paul's in the bathroom and sits himself on the toilet, I tell him about last night.

_"Are you okay now?"_

_"Yea I think so._" Paul just hmms in response and spaces out. I leave the bathroom and he follows a few minutes later.

_"I've gotta go home and change. I'll be back later"_

_"Okay" _With a kiss to the forehead Paul leaves

My thoughts turn to how I talked to Isabella yesterday. _I think she deserved it, she stuck her nose where it doesn't belong, right? She's nice and everything but right now she's on the bad list. And Jacob last night, he hasn't treated me like that since before he phased well more like since before Bella came back. I don't like this whole wolf thing sometimes. I'm imprinted on by someone who loves another. I have a great guy who loves me and I would love to be with him but we can't because there is the stupid imprinting thing yet again. It ruins everything. But look at Sam and Emily._

"_Kass Come On!"_

_"Coming!" _I leave my thoughts at that and go downstairs to spend time with my family. Sam's at the table already stuffing his face and Emily is just sitting two plates down before seating herself.

_"Good Morning"_

_"Morning Sweetie_" I look at the pancakes that Emily cooked.

_"Emmy, Strawberry and Chocolate Chip! Thank you!"_ I clap my hands a little bit, causing her to laugh.

_"I decided we haven't had that in a while so I made it."_

_"Thanks. My absolute favorite!"_ I start to dig in of course with more manners than Sam.

"_So did everything work out last night?" _Both Sam and I turn to look at Emily with confusion.

"_The light bulbs were fine in the hall and bathroom, I just took them out and dropped them."_

"_Why did you take them out_?"

_"I needed a reason for me and Embry to leave._" It starts to click into place.

"_You knew Jacob would come back. You wanted us to talk with now one around_."

"_Yes. I thought that if you two had privacy the two of you could actually talk. I'm sorry I didn't think you'd hurt your foot._" I give Emily a look wondering how she knew without me telling her.

"_Jacob"_

"_Ohh, Emily its fine I get what you were trying to do and I appreciate it actually so thank you."_

_"You're welcome." _The two of us share a smile.

"_Would someone like to fill me in_?"

"_Chill Sam. Everything you just heard is what happened "_

_"Are you sure that's all, nothing happened?"_

_"No, nothing."_

"_How's your foot by the way?" _I watch as Emily goes to move towards the cabinet we keep the first aid in.

"_Foot? What's wrong with your foot? Kass bring your leg out let me see it."_ I start laughing at Sam, he may not admit it but he hates being the last to know.

"_I stepped on glass and got some in my foot. Jacob took care of me, don't worry."_

_"It's okay now right?" _

_"Still hurts I'm walking on the front of my foot."_

_"Okay. If anything starts to feel not right let us know."_

_"Okay."_

We finish the rest of breakfast in a comfortable silence. Well except Sam yawning every 2 minutes. I collect the plates once we're all done and take them to the sink. I wash them off and put them in the washer.

"_Why don't you go lay down? You look exhausted."_ Emily notices too that Sam needs sleep.

_"I'm fine. I need to spend time with my two girls"_

_"We will be here when you wake up."_

_"No real-"_

_"Sam please go sleep, you need to."_

_"Okay. I love you"_

_"Love you too"_ Sam kisses Emily on the scarred side of her cheek like he does every time. Not all imprints are bad.

Sam goes upstairs and Emily comes over to the sink to help with the dishes. We work in silence.

"_Paul and I kissed yesterday_." Emily looks over at me with wide eyes.

_"Are you two-"_

"No, it was something that just happened"

_"I see."_ She gives a look, she knows there's more.

"_Jacob walked in."_

_"Oh Gosh. That's why he came back downstairs all pissed. I knew something was very wrong. "_

_"Like I said long emotional day. Paul and I are going to be more careful because we don't want to develop a serious attachment-"_

_"But you two already have an attachment."_

_"Yes, but I guess it's different because we aren't making a move to do anything more."_

_"What did Jacob say?"_

_"Nothing, he just walked away. Not happy of course. I didn't make matters better with what happened with Isabella,_ _and talking loud enough so Jacob could hear about how I don't care if he feels jealous. I thought he was going to scold me about how I treated Isabella….Emmy was I wrong to snap like that?"_

Emily let out a un-lady like snort.

"_What?"_

_"Scold you for what? She deserved it. Although she was unsuspecting, to the way you'd you react. Which I think you really got to her by the way."_

_"Do you really think so? Do you like her?"_

_"She's a nice girl Kassandra, nothing wrong with her, well except for being in love with a vampire which is causing problems for our men. Then also stringing along one of my boys."_

_"Woah Em-"_

_"No. Yes she's nice but I can't help but blame her for everything that's happening. Sam's exhausted we hardly have anytime together. She never thinks about that. Can't she just go back to living with her mom? Maybe the vampire will follow her there and leave our tribe alone. Plus why are we cleaning up the vampire's mess, that's their job. They left it up to the pack to finish this. Our men are risking their lives for this one girl, who doesn't seem to even appreciate it, and she's not a fucking imprint. It's not fair. It's not fucking fair."_ Emily looks on the verge of crying at the end. I pull her into a hug and we stand there leaning on each other. She pulls away and looks at me.

_"Thanks that's been building up for a while and I don't' want to say anything around the guys."_

_"It's okay I understand. Kim had her break down a few days ago."_

_"It's tough on all of us."_

_"Yea. Hey do you mind if I invite Kim over?"_

_"No go ahead"_

_I run upstairs and get on my cell phone._

_"Hello?"_

_"KIMMMYYYY"_

_"KASSIE!"_

_"Want to come over?"_

_"Yea of course! I might have to wait a bit 'cause Jared's here and catching up on sleep. I don't want to wake him."_

_"Wake him up and tell him he can sleep in my bed"_

_"Are you sure?"_

_"Yes I'm sure"_

_"Alright we'll be right over"_

_"Okay loves"_

_"Loves"_

We hang up and I go skipping back downstairs. Once I reach the bottom I realize I should probably grab some nail polish, considering we like doing each other's nails instead of paying someone. I run right back up the stairs and go to the bathroom and open the cabinet under the sink where I keep the nail polish. I open the shoe box there in but can't decide what colors so I take decide to take the whole thing downstairs. I set the box on the table.

"_She said they'll be here soon."_

_"Jared's with her?"_

_"Yea he's been sneaking into her room after patrol. He was asleep when I called so I told her wake him up and he can sleep in my bed."_

_"Hmm sneaking in. Like Paul's been sneaking in?"_

_"He wasn't sneaking in, Sam knew."_

_"He used the window."_

_"Except for last night, Sam said they walked up together but fair enough"_

_I hear the front door open._

_"That was fast Kim."_

_"UM I'm not Kim, I don't have the lady parts."_

_"Oh shit Quil I'm sorry. We're having a girl's day"_

" _I'll go run around with the guys_." With that he passes through the kitchen to the back door.

"_So I think we might have a bonfire at the end of the month. I think I'll bring Claire along."_

_"Awww Claire! I miss her."_

We hear the door open again. Emily and I look at one another.

"_LADIESS"_

_"KIMMY"_

I get up and give her a hug. I see Jared in the living room, looking like a zombie. I pull away from Kim and she goes to give Emily a hug.

"_Go on Jared. I don't care."_

_"Thanks"_

Kim walks over to give Jared a kiss before he goes upstairs. Another example of why imprinting is not meant to be hurtful. I walk back to the seat I previously occupied. Kim sits on the other side of me.

_"How have you guys been?"_

_"Good. Although Kassie has plenty to share."_

_"Thanks Emmy."_

_"Tell me. Tell me!"_

So I proceed to tell her that Paul has been sleeping with me after patrols. I tell her about the kiss, and Jacob walking in. I finish telling her about everything that's happened, and she just looks at me with wide eyes.

_"WOW. Who knew it would be your life with a lot drama?"_

_"I know it's weird."_

_"So are you spending all your time with Paul."_

_"annnnddd school work."_

_"Oh by the way thanks for leaving me on my own."_

"_You're only taking four classes!"_

_"I know but still I'm alone. Well not really Jared will sometimes sleep in the Parking lot."_

"_Oh man. I'm trying to picture this in my head and it's just so funny_" Emily can't stop laughing.

"_Oh you should see it. The first time I walked out and saw his car I walked over and he had the seat all the way leaned back and was just snoring away."_

_"Oh this is just too good. It's also really sweet. Please get a picture next time._" Our laughter begins to die down.

The three of us sit at the table and just talk about girl stuff, doing our nails. It's about sunset when we hear movement from upstairs. _Sam must be awake or Jared_

_"Would you freaking boys stop coming out of Kassie's bedroom! It's a heart attack every time" _

_"Kim, Emily and Kass are having girl day. I needed sleep."_

The two of them show up in the kitchen a few seconds later, both going to their girls to say hello. I have to turn away because it hurts. I hear the front door open, so I look towards the doorway waiting before Paul appears.

"Hey guys" a chorus of 'hey' are said in response. Paul walks over to me grabbing my hand and helping me out of my chair_. What the hell is he doing_?

_"I'm gonna borrow Kass for a bit if that's okay?"_

_"Yea. Be back in time for patrol though"_

_"Okay"_

Paul leads me out of the kitchen slowly might I add, being careful of my foot.

"_Go get some shoes and lets go."_

_"Where?"_

_"First beach."_

_"Okay just a second._" I walk up the stairs to get some flip-flops and my cell. I walk back out of the room and downstairs.

"_Ready"_

Paul just turns around and starts walking out the door. I follow behind him very confused as to what's going on. Paul gets to the steps on the porch and crouches down.

"_Get on my back"_ I smile at him and do as he said.

"_So what's wrong?"_

_"I'll tell you when we get to the beach."_ Paul continues to walk the short way to the beach. When we reach it Paul finds a spot and gently lets me down. Paul sits down before pulling me down next to him.

"_So what is it?"_

_"Please don't hate me or get mad for what I'm about to say. Okay?"_ _Oh god he imprinted_.

_"What Paul?_" my voice is shaky.

_"I think you've been affected by what happened more than you're letting on. The nightmares are only getting worse, its not going to be long until you start screaming. There's only so much I can help with, I may chase them away but I can't help you."_

"_So what, I'm not allowed to have nightmares after what happened?"_

_"You are allowed but I'm saying that you're keeping quiet. Putting on a happy face, when you're not. Yesterday I meant what I said I haven't seen you laugh and smile like that in a while –_"

_"I was just laughing with Kim and Emily."_

_"You're not 100% happy though are you?"_

I get angry at what he's saying it's the truth but I wish it wasn't. So in a fit of anger my hand reaches out to slap him in the face. The two of us sit there stunned by what happened.

"_Stop it please just stop it! Don't you dare-"_

_"No Kass don't you dare! You're the one who's having trouble and I'm trying to help. So Please shut up and listen to what I have to say"_

I sit there for a little bit trying to calm down a little just because the truth is hard to face.

"Okay what?"

_"Go see a psychologist."_

_"You don't think I haven't thought of that? I've told you that I've thought about it. "_

_"Then why haven't you seen one?"_

_"I don't need to Paul. I'm fine."_

_"No you're not."_

_"Paul! Please!"_

_"Kass listen to me. You need to see one"_

"_Why are you so pushy about this?"_

Paul just looks at me before turning back to the ocean. It's quiet, I'm waiting for him to talk. I don't wanna push him too much knowing that the slap was bad enough. Paul clear's his throat; he's preparing himself for what he's about to say.

"_After my dad left, mom was crushed. She just shut down, went on auto pilot. The only reason for her to get up every day was me. Once I started getting older and becoming more self-reliant, the more she withdrew. She wasn't the same, my mom was always outgoing and everyone loved her, but that didn't matter to her anymore. When I entered High School I found out she started drinking, and she got addicted to the way it made her feel; numb. Sophomore year I come home and I find her passed out on the couch. I didn't think much of it so I went and put in a dinner. I went back out to wake her up-"_

Paul takes a breath here and I can see tears on his face. I move closer to him, so that I'm hugging him. Paul doesn't hug me back.

_"She wouldn't wake up. I tried and tried to wake her up before I finally called 911. They were able to save her in time, but they wrote it down as a suicide attempt so she had to stay in the psychiatric ward for no less than seven days. She was there for 18 days; I stayed with Jared and his family until she came back. Now I'm not saying the minute she got out she was miss happy Skippy but she was better. She kept seeing a psychologist and slowly my mom was able to work on her demons. I was so angry with her for not seeing one sooner but when my mom started to be happy and smile and go out with friends, I couldn't be mad."_ I sit there waiting for him to continue, but he pushes me away, grabbing my shoulders and he looks me dead in the eye.

"_You said that I can't leave you, well I'm not. So that means you can't leave me. I don't think you'd try an attempt but you will become a shell of who you are. I won't let that happen. I'm going to be with you through everything. Please Kassandra just go to one appointment and give it a shot_."

I put my hands over his and lean my forehead against his.

_"Okay."_ My voice is a whisper but its firm and steady.

*Present time*

Sam pulls up to the house, and we all get out. After that talk with Paul we went back and I talked to Sam and Emily, they agreed. The next day I was calling around for psychologists that worked with the reservation and found one to make an appointment with. Only the pack knows that I'm going and of course Kim.

Jacob and I though, I don't even know what to say. We haven't had our chance to talk seriously and I know after this appointment that he's the one I need to talk to first. We have been spending time together, when Paul is on patrol and Isabella's not around. Jacob also hasn't brought her up at all around me, not even mentioning a thing about being rude to her. The only one who did bring her up was Quil asking why I've started calling her Isabella, to which I reply _'I'm not okay with her, so I'm not going to call her Bella like we're buddy buddy cause we aren't'_. No one else has said anything; she still comes around the house though. We don't talk much.

When Sam, Emily and I enter the house I see that it's quiet which means no one will be by tonight. Since we ate before we left for the appointment we decide to watch TV together. We're watching Supernatural, I love Sam and Dean.

_"For the record this show sucks."_

_"Shut up Sam. It's a good show"_

_"I agree with Kass on this one hun_." Sam tosses his head back and groans, knowing he's fighting a losing battle. Once the show is over I decide that I should leave Sam and Emily so they can have some time to themselves.

_"I'm going to bed. Night you two. Thank you for today."_

_"It's no problem sweetheart, we want you to be happy."_

_"Love you guys"_ I walk up the stairs with their voices following me reassuring me that the love me too. I go to my room and change into the nightgown I love to wear, and climb into bed. I am so tired, and then I'm out.

I wake up later to someone shaking me. I open my eyes.

_"What's wrong Sam?"_

_"Nothing just checking on you before I leave. Should I tell Paul to come by?" _I give him a nod while trying to bury myself under the covers. No such luck 'cause Sam pulls the covers back.

"_Ahh Sam it's cold!"_

_"Chill stinks, your so dramatic."_ Sam lets a booming laugh out before leans down to kiss me on the forehead and I shoot him a smile.

"_See you tomorrow Kass"_

_"Be careful Sam"_

_"Oh by the way bonfire is going to be on Sunday end of the month."_

_"Mhms."_ Sam lets out a chuckle before he clothes my door and I'm able to fall back asleep.

I wake up the next morning , of course Paul sleeping behind me. I turn to look at him only to have his eyes stare right back at me.

_"Hey"_

_"Hey."_

_"How was it?"_

_"I liked it, the lady was really nice and it felt good to talk about anything and everything knowing it won't go anywhere but between me and her."_

_"Hmmm. I'm glad you went. Did she say anything?"_

_"She brought up Post Traumatic Stress Disorder"_

_"PTSD. Yea that's what I kinda thought."_

_"Hmm. Well thanks again for convincing me to go. I'm ready to get rid of all the anger. I need to move on with my life."_

_"Smart."_

_"By the way missy, you never apologized for that slap"_ Paul's has no anger so I know he's just joking with me, he knows why I did it.

"_Oh come on Paul you probably didn't feel it."_

_"Still." _Paul lips form into a pout.

_"Aww my poor baby."_ I reach out to pinch Paul on his cheeks as I say this. He just bats my hand away rolling his eyes.

"_The bonfire was moved to the Sunday at the end of the month"_

_"I know Sam told me last night"_

_"Alright. You gonna go cliff diving with us beforehand."_

I take a minute to think about this the last time I was on the cliffs I was throwing my dress to the bottom of the sea and pissed Jacob off.

_"Yea I'll go."_

_"Are you going to actually dive this time?"_

_"I'll get back to you on that."_

_"Wimp."_

_"Bitch"_

_"Hey now that was uncalled for."_ Paul and I start laughing at this.

"_KASSIE! PAUL! GET UP BREAKFAST IS READY!"_

_"We better go, before any of the other guys show up."_

_"True that."_

Paul and I get up and out of bed. Paul opens my door and turns to me waiting for me to go first.

"_You go. I need to change. Save me some please!"_

_"Of course your highness."_

_"Shut up."_

Paul walks out of the room closing the door behind him. I go over to my closet and decide that I want to wear some bright blue yoga pants with a gray and hot pink striped long sleeve shirt. I walk out of the room and go to the bathroom to throw water on my face so I can fully wake up, once I have that done I go downstairs.

"_Good Morning!"_

_"Morning, how did you sleep?"_

_"Good!"_

_"That's good."_

_"So Emily when are we going to get Claire?"_

_"Well I was thinking Saturday and then her mom will get her at the bonfire."_

"_Sounds good."_

We eat the rest of breakfast in silence. I tell Emily she can go to the store to pick up ingredients and I'll do the dishes. While Sam and Emily get ready to go to the store Paul tells me he has to head over to his house for a bit so I decide to do some homework. This week's homework means I have to watch some tutorial videos, so I put on my headphones right when I hear Emily and Sam leave. _God how long does one video about commas take! This-_

I feel a hand on my shoulder, scaring the piss outta me, I turn around in my chair to see a smiling Jacob. I rip my headphones off and press pause on the video. I rip my headphones off and press pause on the video.

"_You fucking asshole! Are you trying to give me a heart attack?"_

_"No but I did see an opportunity so I took it. What are you doing anyways?"_

_"Umm English homework." _Jacob looks behind me at the computer screen.

_"A video on commas? We learned this shit in elementary school."_

_"I know I know but it's required. So I gotta do what I gotta do."_

_"Well hopefully this all works out for you."_

"_Thanks.. .So what are you doing here_?" Jacob just stands there for a few moments looking anywhere but at me.

"_I wanted to see how you were holding up with..."_

_"Oh yeah! It was good I felt comfortable talking. She was very helpful. It's gonna be a step by step process but I'm glad Paul pushed me to go."_

"_I'm glad everything went well."_

_"Yea I want to move on from this, not forget it, but move past it."_

_"I think that's a good idea."_

_"Yup."_

_"Alright well I'm gonna get going.. um you going to the bonfire?"_

_"Of course! Claire's going to be there too"_

_"That's awesome. She's two now right?"_

_"Yea, cute as a button too."_

_"Well I'll see you late."_

Jacob came closer to me, lifted me by the arms out of the chair and pulled me into his embrace. I couldn't help but close my eyes and enjoy the feeling of his heated arms around me.

"_Bye Kassie"_

_"Bye Jacob_" With that Jacob turns around and leaves my room. Once I hear the door shut I sit back down in my chair before I turn around back to the computer screen. _Shit._

* * *

><p><em>So what do you guys think? Good, bad, in between (:<br>_

_I do hope you liked it._

_Thanks for all the reviews, favorites and follows. Please leave feedback_

**_I don't own anything related to Twilight that would be for Stephanie Myer_**

_xoxo_


	12. Bonfire

**Bonfire**

I wake up one morning a month later to the sound of little feet pitter pattering in my room, I'm only half conscious. However the little body that come's flying to my bed makes me fully aware of my surroundings.

"_Kassie! Kassie! Wakey, wakey!"_ This is followed by a bunch of giggles. I open my eyes and pull Claire towards me.

"_Claire-bear! What are you doing? I thought we agreed you'd let me sleep in_" Claire still continues to giggle. She looks up at me with her deep brown eyes.

"_Auntie Emily sent me up. It's lunch time! Now up! _"

Claire removes herself before running out of the room and downstairs. I hear her announce to Emily and Sam that I'm up. _UGH! _I stand up from my bed and head to the bathroom. I do my usual routine, and I pull on sweat pants and a sweat shirt, it's a little cold this morning. Once I'm done I go head downstairs for breakfast.

"_Good Morning!"_

"_Good Afternoon is more like it you lazy bum."_

"_Oh gee thanks Sam." _

Emily places a plate of peanut butter and Jelly sandwiches. I look at her; it's odd to have something so simple at Emily's house. She catches my eye and gives a side nod to Claire, who is happily eating her sandwich while swaying side to side and humming.

"_So what time is the bonfire?"_

"_4:00"_

"_WHAT?! Are you serious I have to get ready! And we always have to show up earlier than everyone else." _I look over at Sam with a fake glare gracing my face.

"_Why didn't you wake me up_?"

Sam just gives me a big grin and shrugs his shoulders. Emily is over in the kitchen cooking, I know not to bother her, she has to cook half of the food, and it's a LOT of food. I sit at the table, eating my lunch, while listening to Claire talk about all her friends at daycare. She is just the cutest little thing, so sweet and innocent. I let out a sad sigh at this thought. Hopefully she'll never have to face the true horrors of this world, real and supernatural. Claire finishes her sandwich in record timing, before going to the living room to watch Dora the Explorer.

"_Uncle Sami, Kassie come watch Dora wit me!_" Both Sam and I look at each other before letting out a few chuckles. Sam shoves the rest of his sandwich in his mouth before going to the living room. I look over at Emily and catch her looking at me, with a weird look in her eye.

"_What is it?"_

"_Nothing, just spacing out_." Emily keeps the answer short and immediately goes back to cooking. I shrug off the look thinking it's not a big deal.

"_Kassie hurry up!"_ I pick up my sandwich and take it to the living room.

"_Sorry ClaireBear I have to go get ready, but I will come back down once I'm done."_

"_Fine, quickly_"

I go up the stairs and finish eating my sandwich. I grab my robe from my room, and go to the bathroom for a shower. Once I'm out of the shower I make sure to put on grapefruit lotion, it's one of my favorite smells. I go back to my room and look through my closet deciding I'll wear a green maxi dress, I pull it out and lay it on my bed. I also decide that I'll straighten my hair for tonight and pull it into a side braid.

As I sit in front of my mirror I let my mind wander to what could happen tonight. I just have a vibe something good will happen today. I let out a smile i_t'd be nice if something good did, with the threat of the vampire we need it._

I go back to blow drying my hair and then straightening it, before I apply a light amount of eye shadow, just enough to make my eyes stand out. I get up from the ground and turn back to my bed to put on the dress. _Damn it's already close to sunset, where the hell did the time go?_ I quickly put on my dress and grab a small purse to put my cell phone in and my new journal. Once down I go downstairs.

"_Sorry Claire Bear time_-" I cut myself off when I see Claire sleeping on the sofa.

"_She fell asleep and hour ago. We're leaving soon."_ I look towards the kitchen to see Sam standing in the door way.

"_You look nice." _Sam gives me one similar to the one Emily gave earlier.

"_Thank you"_

I head into the kitchen, going over to Emily, who is just finishing snapping a lid on one of the containers. I notice that Emily has also changed clothes, into a white flowy skirt and a pink tank top.

"_Lookin good Em!"_ Emily turns around with a smile on her face.

"_Thanks hun. You look very nice."_

"_Thanks. Need help carrying those to the truck?"_ Emily looks back to all the containers filled with food.

"_Yea but leave the big stuff to Sam. I'm gonna go wake up Claire."_

Sam and I both start to take out food to the truck making small talk. All members of the council will be there tonight, so that means we'll get to hear the legends. No matter how many times I hear them, I listen to them like it's the first time all over again. I hear Claire singing some song at the top of her lungs. I look over at her to see her skipping towards the truck, Emily appears behind her after shutting the door.

"_Ready to go Claire?!"_

"_I am I am!" _

"_Let's go"_ I lift Claire into my arms before placing her in the truck instructing her to scoot over. I follow after her and put on her seat belt. Once Emily shuts the door we take off on the way to the bonfire. YAY!

"_Kassie where are your shoes?" _

"_Ooppsie" _

We all let out little chuckles, I never liked wearing shoes, but it always bothers Sam. We drive the rest of the short distance to the beach listening to Claire sing her ABCs . Once we arrive Sue, Harry and Seth Clearwater are already there, setting up the tables. _Wonder if Leah will be showing her face later._

"_Seth!"_

"_Kas_s" Seth and I run towards each other and hug. Seth is the most genuine person ever, I love him.

"_Why's he giving me that look?_" Seth whispers in my ear still not breaking the hug.

"_Who?"_

"_Sam."_ I break our hug and turn to look in Sam's direction. When he catches my eye he just gives me a curt nod. I know that nod, Seth's next. I look back at Seth covering up my disappointment.

"_Don't know. He's having an off day. Don't worry about it" _

"_Kassandra_"

I turn to look at Sue and Harry approaching me. We give each other hugs, and the usual 'how are you' are exchanged. I feel something come barreling into my legs and I look down to see Claire looking up at me. I bend down to pick her up, she's a bit heavy for me so I have to kind of pop my hip to the side.

"_Claire you remember cousin Seth, Aunt Sue and Uncle Harry." _Claire just gives a small nod before looking away shyly and burying her face in my neck.

"_Oh Claire don't act all shy. We all know you aren't"_ I bounce Claire a little bit but she doesn't move her face from my neck.

"_Hey Aunt Sue, Uncle Harry."_ Emily moves into our line of vision and gives them a hug. She turns to look at Seth.

"_WOW! Seth look how much taller you are. I saw you what like a month ago_?" Emily moves to embrace him. Seth gives her a big tight hug.

"_I know it's so random."_

Sam comes over than and greets everyone. I look back at the tables, and see that all the food is already laid out. _WOW! That was quick._ We stand around and talk some more, my arms are starting to hurt because Claire won't get down. I hear some doors shut and I see Old Quil, Billy and Jacob. Jacob helps push his father toward us.

"_Claire can I put you down? I'm gonna go say hi"_ Claire gives a nod, so I let her down and she scurries off to see Emily. She can be shy when it comes to meeting new people, especially people who are older. I walk over to meet the trio that just arrived.

"_Old Quil its soo good to see you!"_ I go and embrace him while he greets me back. We exchange our pleasantries before he walks over to greet everyone else.

"_Miss. Kassie, leaving me for last?"_ Billy's humorous voice rings in my ear. I let out a laugh before I go and give Billy a big hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"_Oh Billy, I always leave the best for last. You know you're my favorite."_

"_I better be young lady. You're looking stunning this evening."_ I let a blush grace my cheeks and mutter a thank you. Billy laughs at this, he always knows how to make me blush. He starts to roll himself down the sand covered boardwalk; the boys put that in just for Billy once the bonfires moved to the beaches. Once Billy starts to make his way past me he grabs my hand, forcing me to look him in the eye.

"_I'm sorry._" Billy's voice is sincere and sorrowful. He glances over to Jacob, and I follow his gaze. Jacob is standing there awkwardly.

"_Me too Billy me too." B_illy gives my hand a squeeze and a wink before continuing on his way. I look to Jacob, who is standing with his hands in his pockets.

"_I hope you're okay that-"_

"_Of course I'm okay with it. He's your dad plus I do love him._"

"_Good._ "

Jacob moves to me and wraps me in a hug. I can't help but close my eyes at the safe content feeling that washes over me. I can feel Jacobs nose in my hair, smelling it. I let a small smile grace my lips. When we step back from one another we share a smile and make our way to the rest of the crowd side by side.

"_Where are Quil and Embry? Your entourage is missing"_ Jacob lets his perfect smile grace his face before he looks down at me.

"_Double Date. They won't be here till later"_

"_Really a date? Where did they meet these girls."_

"_Probably from stalking them and hanging around the same spots they do. Britney Smith and Tatum Ross."_ I nod my head in recognition; they were more part of the popular crowd at school.

"_Nice, can't believe the girls agreed. No offense but we never ran in the same crowd as them." _

"_Who knew you were so into cliques_" Jacobs voice is taunting, he knows what I meant by hit. I nudge him to the side a little bit before laughing.

"_What?"_

"_I could push you with all my might and you wouldn't move an inch"_

"_I can pretend if you want me too."_

"_That'll work. Next time though._"

Jacob and I made it to the rest of the group and he makes his way around saying hi to everyone. I wander over to the table to grab a bottle of water. As I'm taking a sip Claire makes her way to my side and looks at me. I sigh as I place my water bottle on the table again, before bending to pick her up.

"_Am I your human shield tonight?"_

"_Yep. Yep. Yep_" Claire looks at me with a bright smile on her face. I tap her nose with my finger.

"_Well then I'm at your service princess."_ Claire lets out a laugh, before hugging me around my neck, and burying her face in my neck again.

"_I wub you_" I hug her back and turn my body side to side. I close my eyes as a picture starts to make its way to my mind. It's me holding a baby but not Claire this one's my little boy- _No. Not here not now. _

"_I love you too. Have you said hi to Billy and Old Quil."_ Claire pulls back to look at me and give me a nod with a smile.

"_Did you say hi to Jacob?_" She shakes her head.

"_Well lets go._" We walk over to where Jacob is standing talking to Sam. They look serious so I decide to give a little shout to warn them of our presence.

"_Jacob!"_

Both heads turn in my direction and Jacob let's a smile come to his face. Sam walks past me shuffling Claire's hair making her laugh.

"_No Uncle Sammi. Not nice_" She looks at Sam with a pout and Sam laughs while walking back to Emily. I look back to the direction of Jacob and see that he's already made his way next to me.

"_Hey ClaireBear_" Claire lays her head on my shoulder but looks at Jacob with a smile. I let out a little laugh.

"_She's been acting shy since we got here. Claire you've met Jacob before, he's fun!" _

"_I know dat_" I shake my head and look back at Jacob who is smiling as big as he can, but there is a look in his eyes. One he's thinks isn't there but I can see it. _I wander- _

"_WHATS UP?! PARTY TIME!"_

Jacob and I look to see Jared walking hand and hand with Kim, who is shaking her head at her boyfriend's antics. Paul is right behind them letting out a laugh, and high fiving as Jared turns to face him.

"_Jacob son, come here._" Billy waves Jacob over to him.

"_I'll see you later."_ I give him a smile and a nod, before he walks away. I turn back to see Jared and Kim talking to Sam and Emily.

"_Who'd you dress up for_?" I look to my right and see Paul.

"_How'd you do that I just saw you move right in front of me"_

"_I have my ways."_ I roll my eyes knowing Paul's doesn't have a mature answer.

"_Claire Bear hey!"_ Claire gives Paul the same hello that she gave Jacob.

"_She's shy right now. Wait till later she'll be all wound up. Isn't that right?_" I look down at Claire but she just shakes her head, denying being the little monster she can be.

"_I think she just needs a hug_"

Paul moves forward embracing Claire and I in a big bear hug. Claire and I start laughing, but I stop once I hear a deep growl. I look over towards the noise, and see Jacob standing there watching. Billy catches his attention by grabbing his arm dragging Jacob's eyes away from us. If anyone else heard the growl they don't show it.

"_Serves him-"_

"_Don't you dare finish that sentence. He and I are on good terms, I don't need you being an ass and riling him up."_

I pull away from Paul looking him dead in the eye. If that happened they would put me in a position to pick one or the other and I will not do that.

"_Hmm. You-"_

I hear two car doors slam shut and I look past Paul to see Quil and Embry walking towards the party. They are both smiling wide so I'm guessing the dates went well.

"_Why are they so happy?"_

"_They had a double date today!" _I let my voice be a little louder than necessary in a sing song voice. Both Embry and Quil look over at me and make their way towards us.

"_Why yes we did. And I believe there will be another one_" Quil's voice is very smug right now. I laugh and smile.

"_Good I'm glad." _

"_Hey Claire."_ Embry's voice is quiet and he's looking at her while giving her a kiddy wave.

"_Oh Claire Bears here! Hey there_"

Quil moves his line of sight to Claire, and just like that I could see his face change. He's looking at her as if she is the most amazing person on this planet, nothing can touch her, and she's what holds him to this Earth. Everyone's quiet, obviously the wolves can feel when another imprints, causing the rest to stare along with them.

"_You did not just..."_ I put my hand on Claire's back holding her closer to me, and turning my body to the right, as if Paul could be a shield.

"_QUILLIE!"_ Claire squirms in my grasp reaching towards Quil. _Oh god._ Quil just stands there obviously stunned I mean one it's not every day you imprint and it's not every day you imprint on a two year old.

"_QUIL"_ Claire makes the reaching motions more insistent and squirms harder in my hold. I don't want to let her go. _No no no Quil of all people? He's scared of kids_.

I see Quil start to reach out for her too and when he makes contact to pick her from my arms I can't help but flinch away. That only cause's Quil to let out a low growl, I feel Paul put his arm around my waist before stepping forward slightly. I also hear another growl but this isn't from Quil this is from Jacob who is now only a few steps away from us. _Don't threaten an imprint_.

With that thought I let my wide eyes connect with Emily's, and while I can see the uncertainty on her face, she gives me a nod.

"_Aunt Kassie Lemme down. Down!"_

I have to grant Claire's wish but instead of putting her down I hold her out to Quil's waiting arms. Once there Claire gives Quil a hug before starting to talk to him. Everyone is brought out of their surprise, with one last look at Quil holding Claire I make my way over to Sam and Emily who are standing by a confused looking Seth.

"_What just happened_?" Seth's voice sounds so confused and I can't help but feel sorry for him because he can't know yet. I watch as Sam starts to walk over to Quil and Emily follows.

"_Nothing Son. Nothing."_

Harry comes over to squeeze his son's shoulders. I see Harry glance behind me where I can only assume his wife, Billy and Old Quil are gathered. I move to walk past them to go see Kim and Jared, as I reach Harry's side his arm shoots out and grabs my shoulder.

"_Kassie can I talk to you for a bit?"_ I look back over at Kim and give her a wave letting her know I'll see her in a few.

"_Yea of course."_

Harry starts to lead me away from the group and further down the beach. I guess he doesn't want anyone to hear what he has to say. Once we reach a group of rocks he takes a seat on one and I sit on another. I look back towards the party and I can see them starting to light the fire. I also notice another figure standing by the council members and it's not Jacob. _Well Leah's made it_. I look back at Harry who has a sorrowful but kind look on his face.

"_Kassie, I just want to say how sorry I am about what happened. Billy told Old Quil and I but no one else. It's a terrible tragedy and I am deeply sorry, I wish you never had to go through that_."

"_Thank you."_ My voice sounds quiet and small. I'm not 100% comfortable talking to Harry about this, I'm not that close to him.

"_Now Sam came to us and told us that you are seeking counseling."_

"_Yes" _

"_Can you tell me how your emotions have been?"_ I'm a little caught off guard by this question, but he sounds so serious that I immediately answer.

"_Angry, depressed, anxious, happy, every emotion but it all comes at once it's like I can never know which one I'll be feeling next. I'm just starting to feel so broken and incomplete like there is something missing in my life. Something that is right there but I don't know what it is. I feel like I have no purpose right now."_ I feel tears start to come forth, and I look away from Harry wiping my eyes. I feel a hand on my chin and he turns my face to look at him, before he drops his hand.

"_There is no need to be ashamed of your tears. It's just me plain old goofy Uncle Harry."_ I let out a little laugh at this.

"_The counsel and I have a theory, as to a reason why your emotions are heightned_."

"_What?"_

"_The imprint isn't being acted upon. Once you imprint or become an imprint that person becomes a part of you. With Jacob and you not really acting on it, it's causing your emotions to be extra sensitive and with everything that has happened, it's making your emotions out of control."_

"_I'm not sure I follow."_

"_I'm just saying that what you described about feeling no purpose and incomplete that could be because of the imprint. Ask Sam he knows how it can feel, and so does Emily. Everything else is because of the incident."_

"_But why am I the only one with the sensitive emotions, why isn't Jacob feeling this_?"

"_Don't be so sure that you're the only one suffering right now Kassandra. How many times have you actually seen Jacob since this? From what I hear from Billy, he's just as distraught."_

"_But why won't he act on the imprint? Why doesn't he come to me_?"

"_The vampire girl, Bella. He loved her before he imprinted, he loves her and that's clouding his judgment."_

"_I love Paul"_

"_Yes. I hear you two have been getting close-"_

"_He's been there for me."_

"_Have you and Paul talked about a relationship?"_

"_Yea. We decided that nothing could go further, no attachments, because he could imprint at any time and he doesn't want to hurt me. Plus Jacob's his pack brother."_

"_There you go. You and Paul have talked about this and realize that nothing can come of it. Jacob and Bella haven't so Jacob still has the idea that something could happen." _

"_Oh."_

"_But I will tell you this, Jacob's is very needy when it comes to you. Jacob is starting to feel the same pain you are, the pull is getting stronger. My guess is because you were- well I just want you to be aware of what could be happening."_

"_I don't want him to love me because of the imprint."_

"_He doesn't he's always loved you, everyone knows but him, and sometimes that happens." _

"_This is all so much. I hate this."_

"_Yes, if I'm correct so did Sam when he imprinted on Emily." _Harry gets up to leave.

"_Just remember there is a reason they call it a 'soul mate. There's a difference between loving someone and letting a person have your heart._'" With that Harry starts walking away.

"_Thank you_." My voice is but a whisper.

I look at the sand in front of me and watch as the water comes in and pulls out. I slide off the rock preferring to sit in the sand right now. I'm not really sure if that conversation actually made sense. I really don't think it did. I don't get it. I continue to sit in the sand and I start to draw pictures with my hands.

"_There a reason that you're sitting all the way over here?"_ My hand continues to draw and I don't look up but I am shocked at who it is. _The reason is because of you… ironic_. I shake my head and then look over at Jacob.

"_Come sit with me."_

Jacob complies and scoots right next to me leaning against the rock and stretching his legs out next to mine. We sit in silence, I'm trying to figure out what to say and I know Jacob is just being patient with me.

"_You would have been a good mother. Seeing you with Claire…"_ I look over at Jacob in shock; this is the first time he's made reference to our possibility of parenting. He doesn't look at me and I turn back to watching the ocean.

"Thank you_. You would have been a great dad." _

"_You know I would have been there every step of the way right?"_

"_I know." _My voice is a whisper.

"_I still want to be."_

"_What do you mean?"_

"_Right now. I want to be there every step of the way. I know you have Paul who has been your confident. But I would like to be there as well Kass. If you'll let me?"_

I take a moment to think about this. Is it a good idea? I mean he's offering to be there, he wants to be. The idea actually is very appealing until that stupid little voice in the back of my head reminds me. _You love Paul, but we know who owns your heart. He will only crush you. _

"_I want you to be, Jacob I really do." _

"_I will be. How bout I take you to every session? I'll be there 100%"_

I give him a nod, knowing that he's making a vow. I have to give him a second chance.

"_I'm sorry about the other day."_

"_Huh?"_

"_When I snapped at Isabella." No you're not. _Just seemed right to say.

"_Oh right._" I turn to look at Jacob with shock. Where's the lecture. The I can't believe you said that blah blah blah

"_That's it?"_

"_Can we not talk about her?"_

"_No." I_ hear Jacob sigh and I can't help but turn on my knees so I'm facing him.

"_What are you trying to do Kassie?"_

"_Talk._" I answer as if it's the most obvious thing.

"_Right now?"_

"_Yes."_

"_Okay. Who first?"_

"_Me." _

"_I'm sorry. I was acting like a selfish bitch. I needed someone to blame though and you were the only one that seemed like a good candidate. I know that you also lost something that day, and I never thought twice about how you're dealing with this. Well I have but I've just been so stupid and mad. I have Paul you don't have anyone…unless you told?"_

"_No I haven't told her anything."_

"_So who have you vented to?"_

"_No one." _I feel tears start to fall down.

"_I'm sorry I'm so sorry. Here I am having someone who has been there for me and you haven't. God I'm so sorry, I really am. I love Paul, but we decided that there is nothing that can happen. We will always love each other and have a connection, one that I don't think anyone can break. But Jacob If we're going to be honest here I love you. I will always love you, it's been you since the beginning. And I hate you for that, here I can have a guy who is amazing to me, loves me back, yet I can't let anything happen because of all this werewolf shit and you. It's not right. Paul and I are the couple that is just at the wrong place and wrong time. I want to give you a second chance Jacob. I need you to understand though where I'm coming from, be patient with me. I want to be friends."_

I look at Jacob trying to gauge his reaction. Tears are streaking down my face, I'm so scared of what he thinking. Jacob continues to look down and I'm starting to feel scared.

"_I'm sorry that I wasn't there. I should have been. I can't tell you how many times I thought about what would have happened if I had been there. I'm always wishing I could turn back time but reality is that I can't. I hate myself for letting this happen to you. I've been selfish as well, I know that you weren't always happy with the no relationship and I still brought Bella around, pretty much shoving it in your face. And I'm so sorry. I love you Kassie I do I really do, I know that now. It's just I have to see if there is a chance with her and if there is I'm going to take it. I want you to be happy and at the same time I want to be selfish and make sure no other man can touch you. There are so many conflicting things that are going on. But I want you to be happy and if Paul makes you happy than don't stop a relationship on my account. I just I love you Kassie and I'm sorry for how every things turned out."_

"_It's not just because of you Paul doesn't want to start something and then him imprint on another girl. He never wants to hurt me, which I understand. I just thought you should know that Paul and I can't happen. However as much as I hate to admit it I don't think I'm strong enough to ignore the imprint. It's always going to be you Jacob. "_

"_I don't know if I can be selfish enough to make you wait for me. You're so special to me and I'm in love with you but I can't drop Bella, she needs me right now. In a different way than you do but she needs me like you need Paul…It's a little freaky how a like the situations are. I want to be there for you from this point on you are my priority, but I still am in love with Bella."_

I continue to cry but I can't look at him. I look to the side back to where the party is they have no idea what's happening. I can see Paul laughing with Jared but he's facing this way. _Watching us. _

"_When you said if could break the imprint what did you mean?"_ I start to shake my head at this but I can't stop the words. _Damn you word vomit _

"_I wanted nothing to do with you. I wanted to break the imprint and act like it never happened. Imprinting hasn't been as amazing for me as everyone else, I mean it's brought hurt to me. I wanted to be with Paul, I wanted to feel like I wasn't betraying you every time I thought being with him. Plus how do I know if you really love me?"_

"_I've loved you before I phased."_

"_Am I going to be second best?"_

"_No, I will never treat you like that again. I don't want you to feel like that anymore, not from me."_

"_Okay."_ I feel Jacob pull me to his chest and I just lay there. The tears start to slow down, and we sit in quiet.

"_Kassie?"_

"_Hmm?"_

"_Look at me."_

I look up at Jacob and before I can react his lips are on mine. My eyes slowly close as I let myself sink into the feeling and I respond. It's like a thousand fireworks going off at once. _Fireworks_ It brings back flashbacks of that night we shared.I'm starting to feel that pull in my stomach, the butterflies, and the way my heart reacts_. It feels so amazin-_

"_No."_ I whisper as I pull away from him. I only pull away enough to look into his eyes.

"_Don't please don't" _

"_I don't understand-"_

"_You still love her, I still love Paul. This is wrong, just because we had this talk doesn't mean that we can act lovey dovey with one another. No."_ I pull myself away from Jacob so I'm sitting opposite of him.

"_Your right. I'm sorry, I didn't mean for_ _that to happen I just had to do it I needed it" _Jacob trails off and doesn't finish that sentence. We sit there in silence and I can't help but feel like a total slut. I feel like I betrayed Paul. I did betray Paul. _Oh god_.

I start to stand up but Jacobs hand grabs mine stilling me in mid-move. I don't turn back around not really wanting to hear what he has to say. After a few silent moments Jacob begins to speak.

"_Where you going? "_

"_I'm walking away from this situation before it gets out of hand. We shouldn't of done that."_

"_Why shouldn't we of?" _

"_Because we love two other people. Obviously you aren't ready to be with me so stop. You can't just- we can't"_

"_We can't what? Have one kiss? You're my imprint-"_ I turn around and cut him off mid-sentence.

"_So what?. You didn't do anything about me being your imprint before. So why now is it okay for you to kiss me after everything I just told you and send me even more mixed signals?"_

"_It's because of what you said that I did that, I had to do it Kassie. And I'm not the only one sending mixed signals. A few moments ago you kissed me back, didn't you?"_

"_I AM not sending you mixed signals. Like I said I have told you everything I feel just now and you're the one acting rash, of course I kissed back, I couldn't help it. You've known how I felt all this time. With you I didn't know that you liked me before this whole imprint mess. All I knew was Bella, Bella, Bella…. I didn't know anything._"

My voice was raising and by the end I realized that the boys could probably hear me so I made sure to lower my voice at the last part. Jacob stays quiet but his face looks inquisitive. He doesn't say anything and I start to bite my lip feeling nervous, about his response. C'mon say something, give me a response.

"_Okay."_ Jacob looks at me with a small smile on his face. I look at him with a look of incredulous as he starts to stand up, brushing sand off of his cutt off shorts.

"_What?" _

"_Okay."_

Jacob is still smiling he reaches out and gives me a hug which I don't return. I'm stunned into silence. When Jacob pulls away I don't say anything, I can't words are lost from my mouth. Jacob starts walking away, with his hands in his pockets.

"_What do you mean okay?"_

"_I mean okay. We do this your way." _

Jacob turns around to look at me and from here I can see the mischievous glint in his dark brown eyes. He turns back around.

"_That's it? That's all you're going to say?"_ I have to raise my voice because I am in complete disbelief at where this conversation went.

"_Don't worry about it Kassie. Don't worry about it. It'll all be okay."_ Jacob's voice has laughter in it.

I can't help but let a small smile cross my face before I quickly erase it. I look down at the ocean before looking out the ocean while I cross my arms. _What's that supposed to mean? How can I not worry about it? Did he know this is how I'd react? Did he plan this? _

I look back in the direction of the bonfire seeing that Jacob is already back enjoying the party. I stand there for a few minutes just watching. _Is there a reason you're still standing here like an idiot? _

I start making my way back and as soon I step in the fires light Kim comes bounding over to me.

"_So what was that about?"_ Her voice is light and curious.

I look around and see Jacob standing at the table drinking from a red cup talking to Embry and Quil, who is still holding Claire making her giggle and smile. I watch as Jacob reaches out and tickles Claire under the chin, making her squeal and Quil smile.

"_I have no idea_." I let out a smile before looking back at Kim. She gives me a look as if to say "are you kidding me?" I can tell she's about to say something, but I don't feel talking about it right now.

"_Kim not now please. Where's Paul_?" Kim looks at me once more before smiling she turns to point behind her and I see Paul playing soccer with Jared, Sam and surprisingly Seth.

"_How is Seth able to keep up_?" I let out a small laugh before shaking my head. Kim laughs with me, turning back to watch Jared.

"_The guys are going easy on him I guess. They've just been kicking it away from one another, not really soccer or anything." _

"_Ohh okay." _

Kim and I stand there talking a bit more talking mainly about how schools going. I can tell she still wants to know what happened but I don't' really want to talk about it till I know. I hear a noise behind us and I turn to look over my shoulder to see Leah walking away, quite quickly. I didn't even know she was sitting there. I look to see what could have gotten her to ditch that fast. I see Emily walking over with a sweater of Sam's wrapped around her shoulders.

"_Hey there." I_ can see on her face that she noticed Leah walking away.

"_Hey what's up?"_

"_Just finished talking to Sue and Harry. Apparently Sue is having trouble at the diner, the busser quit." _

"_Really?"_

"_Yea he left to go to college."_

"_Is she hiring?"_

"_Well yea."_

"_I might have to talk to her then." _I hear Kim let out a snort of laughter causing me to look at her.

"_What?"_

"_Nothing just never thought you'd get a job till you needed it" _

"_I do need it."_

"_Then why not work at the library with me?"_ I pause after that wondering why I'm not.

"_Cause…it's boring?"_ Kim just laughs and shakes her head before looking at Emily.

"_Did the guys eat all the food?"_

"_No there's still a little left. Jared didn't get you a plate?"_

"_No he did. Kassie hasn't eaten though?_

"_What why not?_

"_Oh 'cause she went off to talk to Harry and then when Harry came back without her Jacob disappeared and then came back without her AND THEN Kassie finally came back but is keeping mum about what happened."_ I look at Kim with wide eyes but she sends me a wink. _Sneaky Sneaky girl._

"_Oh really now?"_ Emily drags out the words, and I look back at her, the look in her eyes tells me that I'm about to be ganged up on. I look between the two for a minute before letting a smile break across my face.

"_Really, really….now if you ladies will excuse me."_ I walk away before than can say anything else. I walk over to where the guys are playing

"_Paul!"_ Paul stops running and he looks over at me with a smile. I give him a 'come hither' motion with my finger. He walks away from the game getting a few shouts of protest from the guys.

"_Hey there. What's up?"_

"_Nothing. Um can we go?"_ Paul looks at me with a hesitant look on his face.

"_They haven't told the legends yet and you love to hear those._" I move over to him and grab his hand.

"_I can miss them just this once. Please Paul I need to talk to you_."

"_What? What happened_?" Paul moves closer and cups my cheek. I can watch his eyes move across my face. So warm and caring, but they aren't chocolate brow-

"_Please Paul. Just you and me." _

"_Alright but I don't have my truck-"_

"_That's fine. We can walk."_ I answer quickly.

"_You don't have shoes." _

"_Why are you being so against this_?" I step back from him feeling a little rejected.

"_No no I'm not. Lets go."_ Paul moves over to put his arm around my shoulders, turning me around to walk towards the exit of the beach.

On our way we pass Emily and Kim, I shoot them smiles.

"_Bye you guys. I'll see you later tonight or tomorrow I promise_" Kim gives me a nod of assurance but Emily has a look, that I can't quite dispatcher. Paul gives them a wave before pulling me away. _What was that look for?_

I get caught up in my thoughts and next thing I know I feel someone bump my shoulder.

"_Hey watch it."_ I hear Paul defend me harshly to whoever bumped my shoulder. I look up at him about to scold him for being rude. His face goes from annoyed to pissed off. I look over to see who bumped my shoulder.

"_What are you doing here?" _

"_Oh…um Jake mentioned the bonfire…I – I thought I'd drop b_y, it sounded pretty cool and I thought I'd see everyone." I'm a bit stunned by her appearance. Paul however has plenty to say.

"_Yea well listen here you little-"_

"_BELLA!"_

Paul and I look over to see Jacob walking over to us. By the confused look on his face he wasn't expecting her here. All three of us wait for Jacob to reach us, once he does I can watch as Bella moves over to him. I can't help but let out a glare, I look up to catch Jacob's glance. He's giving me an apologetic look, as well as a questioning one.

"_Hey Jacob…I…uh hope you don't mind me showing up here."_ Jacob looks away from me to look at Bella.

"_No it's..."_ Jacob clears his throat obviously feeling a bit awkward. _"…it's okay..."_ Jacob glances over at Paul and I as if seeking confirmation.

"_Well we were just leaving. So Bella I hope you have a good time. Enjoy the legends, and Emily's cooking of course."_ I decide to be polite. Doesn't hurt does it?...kinda

"_Where you guys going? Why you leaving?" _

"_Just back to Sam's house, it's feeling a little cramped." _

"_Oh are Kim and Jared meeting you there?"_

"_Nope just us."_

Paul makes sure to pull me closer to his body. I look up to see him glaring at Jacob, I look over to Jacob and he's meeting Paul's silent eye challenge. I feel a bit disgusted with this at the moment so I pull away from him a bit, but still in his grasp.

"_Oh well you two have fun_." I look over and catch Bella looking at me, when I meet her glance, she looks away, turning her gaze to look between Jacob and Paul.

"_Oh we will. You two enjoy the…what was private bonfire, you know made for family, the pack, and of course imprints."_

"_Imprints?"_ Bella's voice makes the two guys look at her.

"_Oh you'll hear about it during the legends. It's a lovely concept_, i_t's about soul mates. Just a warning don't believe it when Billy say's they always end up together or that they are so magically connected._" As Paul finishes his last word he rolls his eyes. Obviously a jibe at Jacob. I roll my eyes at this thought.

"_Oh…um okay_." Bella's voice is small. I feel a little bad for her, so I decide to cut her some slack.

"_Well we better get going. Billy will start with the legends soon and you can't miss that. C'mon Paul. Let's. Go. Now." _I turn to Paul speaking the last part through my teeth, and send him a glare. He just looks at me and smirks. I turn back to Jacob and Bella.

"_Have a good night_. Hopefully we'll be back to see you later."

I look Jacob in the eyes and he stares right back. He almost looks like he's pleading with me to stay. I feel Paul's arm kind of push me to turn around. I break my gaze and let Paul lead me away, neither of us speaks. As we're leaving I see Leah lounging around her parents car, looking at her cell phone.

"_Bye Leah."_ I give her a small smile when she looks at me, and to my surprise she gives me a nod. No glare, well that's nice. She is pretty without the glare. I feel Paul move his hand from my shoulder to give a small wave, her response is to just look back at her phone.

Once Paul and I are far enough from the beach so that when I turn around all I can see is the orange light reflecting on the cars.

"_Did you have to act like a total ass?"_

"_No."_

"_Then why did you?"_

"_Because I can." _

"_Whatever, Paul."_

"_Are you seriously mad right now?"_

"_A little bit."_

"_Well I'm not gonna say sorry."_

"_I didn't expect you to. Look let's forget it okay. There's something else we have to talk about"_

"_Alright." _

"_When we get to the house." _

"_Okay. I'm guessing it's bad."_

I keep my mouth shut, because I don't really know how to respond to that right now. _Let's just get to the house, and then get it over with_.

* * *

><p><em>Hello my lovelies!<br>_

_Another chapter for you and I hope you enjoyed. _

_Thanks for all the reviews, favorites and follows. _

_If anybody has any suggestions or feedback please let me know. _

**_I don't own anything related to Twilight that would be for Stephanie Myer_**

_xoxo_


	13. Space

**Space. **

When Paul and I reach the house I lead Paul to sit on the couch. Once we're both sat I turn to face Paul so that one of my legs is pulled on the sofa. Paul mimics me and just stares at me for a minute. I don't really know what to say or how to lead into it.

"_Jacob and I kissed." _

"_I know."_

"_What? Ho- how do you know?"_

"_When Jacob came back he had a shit eating grin on his face, and when you followed shortly after him wanting to leave I kinda guessed. And with you just saying it right now well I know."_

"_And…..?" _

"_And that's…that's fine"_

"_That's….fine?"_

"_Yea."_

I look at Paul but he isn't looking at me, his eyes are trained on his shoes. I don't really know what to think 'cause I'm surprised he's actually okay with this.

"_Okay well glad that you didn't get mad."_

"_I have no reason to be mad, you're his imprint, plus it's not like you guys haven't hooked up already._" I can hear a little annoyance seeping through, or is that sarcasm.

"_I mean you were pregnant with his kid for God's sake! Though I don't get it Kass you hate him one moment and kiss him the next what's it going to be? Can you even let your mind settle on which it is? I haven't even gone out with another girl since you and I talked about feelings for each other. Yet here you are telling me you kissed the guy who has broken your heart so many times. I mean come on Kass open your eyes and think for once." _By now Paul has stood up and his pacing back and forth, running his hands through his hair.

"_Okay first of all ouch. Second of all you were the one that said we couldn't enter a relationship-"_

"_I know what I said Kassandra, but honestly I thought we at least had a silent agreement."_

"_Okay I'm completely lost just a second ago you said you weren't mad, and now your yelling at me?"_ By now I've stood up as well, we are both staring at each other.

"_I'm not mad, I'm jealous. I want you all of you, but I know that not even I can't have all of you. Plus if I imprint than you won't have all of me and we'll grow to resent each other. I'm jealous that some fucking asshole, who doesn't even come close to deserving you gets to imprint on you."_ Paul resumes his pacing and is now just ranting, so I let him.

"_Paul"_ I let his name come out in a sigh. I stand there watching him pace for a few minutes, its quiet. I'm too scared to say anything. What would I even say? Finally I have enough and I decide to go stand in front of him. He stops his pacing and looks up at me, his face twisted in confusion.

I move forward and give him a hug, at first he doesn't react but he eventually slowly wraps his arms around me and rests his head on mine. We stand like that for what seems like hours but is probably only a few minutes.

"_I need to sort out what I feel and I think you need to sort out how you feel._" I hug him tighter I know what's coming, and I honestly don't know if I'm going to stop him this time. "_I'm going to need space for a bit, not forever but just a while, I think this will work out better if we both just take a few steps back_."

I close my eyes as I feel tears start to build up, I just nod my head up and down though. His hands are now rubbing circles along my back. I feel his lips press to the top of my head. I don't want this moment to end, this is probably the most tender embrace I've ever had.

I pull back just enough so he can lean his forehead on mine. I move up pressing my lips to his, and he doesn't hesitate to bring on of his hands to tangle in my hair. There is urgency and sweetness in this kiss, our lips are moving in synch. _No fireworks._

This goes on for a few more moments, before I finally pull back. I bite my lip and slowly open my eyes, the intensity in his eyes. I stare into his eyes a bit more before there are crinkles coming to the side, showing that he's smiling...and laughing?

"_What?"_

"_Just a bit ago you were mad at me for being an ass, which totally don't understand. Then I was just yelling at you, saying we needed to take a step back and now we're kissing. I think we have a bit of a bipolar relationship in intense times."_

"_I guess so."_ I let out a little chuckle before I look away from his eyes. I pull out of the embrace to look in his eyes once more, before I move to walk past him to go up the stairs. Just as I put my foot on the first step Paul's voice makes me turn around.

"_Where are you going?"_

"_My room?"_

"_Why?" _

"_Didn't you just say you need some space? I thought that meant starting now, or well after that kiss." _

"_I do, I do need the space. I just thought that you would have something to say."_

"_Well I don't really know what to say."_

"_Really?"_

"_Really, really."_

"_So that's it. Nothing about how you feel, or what you think?"_

"_Why do you want me to react? Everything your doing is the opposite of what you just said a few minutes ago."_

My words seem to break Paul out of whatever kind of haze he was in.

"_I just wanted to see that you were as serious as I am about this." _

I take my foot off the step because it's getting uncomfortable. Instead I walk towards the recliner and lean on the back of it.

"_I am serious about this. I'm pretty sure that kiss should have proved it. Plus I'm not the one who needs the space."_ I know my voice is dripping with venom on that last bit.

Paul just shakes his head and runs his hands through his hair again before it lands on his neck where he rubs it a bit. I can hear him let out a bit of a chuckle, which makes me raise my eyebrows.

"_Don't act like that Kass"_

"_Act like what exactly?"_

"_Like I'm leaving you, like this is goodbye."_

"_I'm not acting like that." _

"_Well that's what it seems like."_

"_Hmm." _

_Am I being a complete brat right now? _I don't know I can't even sort through my thoughts right now. All I know is within the last hours I have not only had a serious talk with Jacob, but I kissed him, then I got mad at Paul for being an ass. Than when Paul and I got back I tell him and he rant's to me that he's jealous and that he needs space. Lastly I shared the most tender emotional kiss with Paul. _Oh Gosh two guys in one day? Seriously, jeez. _

I'm pulled out of my thoughts when Paul says my name, and I notice he moved closer.

"_Sorry I spaced. Look Paul I'm going to let you make your decision your right we need to think clearly about this. I wish you wouldn't feel the need to stay away but it's your choice. I'm sorry if I was being a brat I just had so much happen today. I'm tired."_

"_It's fine I just wanted some reassurance is all. Don't forget I'm feeling how you feel when it comes to Bella and Jake right now. Jealous, sad, longing" _

I look at Paul and I reach my hand out to take his. I rub my thumb across his hand.

"_That's deep. Didn't know you could have that much of a chick flick moment."_

I'm trying to lighten the mood, and our hearts. We smile at each other and just like that I feel relief. Paul and I get each other, we have rough times like everyone, but in the end we have that bond.

"_Yea well don't let the guys know. Okay?"_

"_Of course not Paul. It's our secret." _

"_This isn't a goodbye."_

"_I know. I'm just a little stunned right now. Okay?"_

"_Okay. So one more kiss?"_

I laugh before I reach his cheek planting a soft kiss. I pull back to see him wearing a wolfish smile.

"_That's all mister."_

"_Fine. I get it I get it."_

"_Fine. Are you okay?"_

"_Yea I'm good. I'm gonna head back to the bonfire. Wanna come?"_

"_Nah I'm going to bed. I'll see you soon?"_

"_Yup."_

With that Paul turns his back and walks out the door. When the doors fully closed and I hear his footsteps leave the porch. I take a look around the living room in the place I have come to know as my home. I feel claustrophobic somewhat.

No you just need 2 pills of Ibuprofen, and go to bed. Don't think about anything, there is always tomorrow. Okay maybe 3 Ibuprofen. Now where are the Ibprofen? Kitchen...Bathroom….oh wait my room.

I turn and make my way up to my room. I take my phone out of my pocket and toss it on the bed, before heading to the desk where I have the Ibuprofen set down from the other day. I pour out the pills before dry swallowing. I do my usual get ready for bed routine and when I get back to my bed I see my phone light up. Text Message from Kim?

Are you okay?

Um. Yea just heading to bed why?

Well Paul just got back and he seems to be in a sour mood, and having a glare fight with Jake. Did something happen?

That little shit liar. I should have known he would be angry; it's the only damn emotion he knows.

Nah everything is good Kimmy. Have fun! Night.

Night hun. 

Satisfied I turn off my lamp before lying down in bed. Instead of falling asleep though I lay awake feeling even more claustrophobic than before. I shut my eyes as tight as I can and lay my hands across my chest.

_Okay clear your mind. Everything is fine, you can worry about it tomorrow. What is Paul so mad about he told me he wasn't I mean- No Kass don't ready count backwards. 100-99-98-97. Damn it I'm feeling so closed in right now. I'm so done with all this bullshit I just want to get away._

I throw the covers off and sit up turning on my lamp. I sit there for a minute holding the edge of the bed tightly. Before I even know what I'm thinking I shot off the bed and am running down the stairs to the closet we have in the back, I open it before moving to my knees to search.

_C'mon where is it? Where is it? Ah ha there it is._

I grab the luggage bag before carrying it back up the stairs to my room. I lay it on my bed before zipping it open. I charge for my closet grabbing all the basics I'll need. Finally I look around the room and grab my purse. I dig out my wallet; I look through and find the bank card.

_I can stop anywhere and grab some of the money my parents left. Okay one last look around check to make sure you have everything- oh cell charger and cell phone_.

I grab the cell charger and throw it in my suit case before zipping it closed. I change into a pair of sweats, placing my cell in the pocket and grab some flip flops. I don't bother with anything else, I don't need to. I make my way down the stairs and out the door. I make sure to lock up, before turning back to get on with my mission. I open my trunk door and put the suitcase in, just as I'm about to shut the trunk. I have a few second thoughts.

_What the fuck am I doing? _

_-Your trying to get away so you can think_

_Well I know that but is running away the right thing to do? Of course not, you were caught in the moment. _

I let go of the trunk and start to get the suitcase to bring it back out.

_-Or is this what you really need?_

_Okay I'm trying not to listen to you right now you're that little devil me. _

I feel like I have the devil and angel on my shoulders whispering in my ear.

_Great now I'm crazy. _

_-Are you? I mean this could be a good break, just you no one else. No other influences._

_No I can't do that to Sam and Emily they'd freak this isn't right. _

_-Leave a note or something. _

_NO! I can't this is just so-_

"_Going somewhere?"_

I whip around to look behind me, and I must say I'm shocked at who it is. I can't even form words to come out of my mouth.

"_I'm going to ask again going somewhere?"_ His sweet voice sounds so condescending, it scares me a little.

"_I..I…This.. This um isn't what it looks like? I swear I just had a mom-"_

"_Can I come with you?"_

"_Wait what?"_

"_Can I come with you? I mean you're safer this way and I think what's life without making stupid mistakes?"_

I cross my arms over my chest and stare into his eyes. His baby face, looking at me with excitement and curiosity. I glance down at the gravel driveway, giving this a little thought.

_Him of all people, not who I expected but maybe he's right. Okay let's do this, be an idiot think clearly for once, well actually I'm thinking stupid. _

I look back up and stare in his eyes one last time, he's serious about this. I give him a smile and open my mouth about to give him my answer.

* * *

><p><em>I'm sure some of you are sad to see them taking space, but they do both need it! <em>

_Thank you for reading and comments!_

_I don't own Twilight. _

_xoxo_


	14. East

**East. **

"_Okay Embry let's go."_

Embry lets out a huge smile and starts walking towards the car, I notice his smile turns into one that is almost like Paul's mischievous smile.

"_I'm driving!" _

"_What?! Are you crazy no this is my car!"_

"_I called it." _

Before I know it he's shut the trunk and is already in the driver's seat adjusting it to fit his size. I throw my head back but I can't help but let a smile grace my face. I turn to the passenger side of the car and slide in. I place the keys in Embry's waiting hands, I don't even want to see that smug look.

"_So did you leave any kind of note for Sam and Emily?" _

"_No. I was going to call them."_

"_Well how 'bout this you go run in write some sort a note."_

"_Why we're in the car can't we go?"_

"_Kass I'm gonna need clothes."_

"_Oh. Right" _I give Embry a sheepish smile.

"_But what if when you're gone they come back and…"_

"_Kass Billy hasn't even started the stories yet. So you're good." _

I look out the window back out the house and I shake my head.

"_I can't do this." _

I go to open the door but Embry's hand reaches and closes the door. I look over at him shocked, this isn't his normal behavior.

"_Please Kass. Don't back out. Do this with me please."_

I sit there staring at him, he's giving me a pleading look I'm so confused. This isn't happy Embry, this is a totally different side that I have never seen and I'm worried.

"_Okay. But I'm not going back in that house."_

"_Fine I'll go just wait here okay." _

With that Embry leaves the car and starts towards the house. I realize that he left the keys in the ignition, so I roll down the window.

"_Embry, you're going to need keys I locked the house."_

"_It's called the back door." _And with that he runs to the back of the house. _Oh. _

I sit there and wait, the silence is starting to kill me my mind is running. This isn't just me anymore its Embry. I turn on the radio and my Avenged Sevenfold CD starts playing the song "Seize the Day". I lean my head back on the head rest and close my eyes, letting the music consume my mind.

I hear the door open and shut. I turn my head to look at Embry, he looks back at me and for a second I can see doubt flash across before his eyes, but then he gives me a smile.

"_Ready?"_

I can't speak right now, so I just nod. Embry starts to pull out of the drive way after adjusting the mirrors. We sit in silence until we reach his house, I notice all the lights are off, I furrow my eyebrows confused. _Where's his mom? She never goes to the bonfires. _I look over at Embry but he won't look at me, instead he just gets out of the car and heads inside his house to pack.

_What the hell is going on around here? You know what don't even think about it, everything will unravel eventually for now just worry about getting out of La Push. Not getting caught. Think about where were going…..wait where are we going? Are we going far? Just to Port Angeles? What? Okay here's Embry. Calm. The. Fuck. Down. _

Embry opens the trunk and puts his stuff in before he gets back in the car. Embry starts to back up and I turn my head to look out the window. I pull my phone out of my pocket and just stare at it.

"_I left a note."_

"_I know. I just should call and at least leave a message. Let them hear my voice you know?"_

"_I know. Well how are you going to call without them answering?"_

"_Emily never brings her phone to bonfires."_

"_What? Really."_

"_Yea. She thinks that there's no point she knows everyone else has theirs. She once told me it just didn't seem right. "_

"_Interesting."_

"_Did you bring your cell phone with you?"_

"_I don't have a cell phone."_

"_Did you leave a note for your mom, I mean she's gonna need to know you're okay." _ I turn in my seat to look at Embry ready to give him a scolding, for just leaving. _Oh don't be a hypocrite. At least I'm leaving a note. You're still running away. I am not running away! I'm just…I'm just taking a vacation. Whatever. _

"_Just call Emily and tell her the situation." _ I notice his voice has a certain edge to it, and that he avoided my answer.

I look back at my phone and I decide to just get it over with. I scroll through my contacts, but when I get to Emily's name I freeze.

"_It's okay." _

"_Yea." _

I hit the call button and it immediately goes to voicemail. _Yes now I don't have to listen to the ringing. _

"_Hey Emmy. I just wanted to let you know I'm okay. Please don't send out a search party. I just I need time to figure out what the hell is going on in my life. I'll call with updates. Just know that I need this and I'm okay. Love you"_

I hang up the phone and let a lonely tear fall down my face. I wipe it away quickly before I scroll to Paul's name, I decide to be a coward and just send him a simple text.

_I'll miss you. _

I wait for a response but I don't get anything. _Wait it out, he's mad, just needs time to calm down. _I decide to put my phone on vibrate, and just leave it in my pocket. I look at the clock on the dashboard 10:26pm.

"_The bonfire ends soon."_

"_I know. We'll be out of La Push, even Forks before they are all done." _

"_Where do they think you are?"_

"_Walking along the beach." _

"_Why did you end up at Sam's?"_

"_I wanted to see if you were alright. First I hear what happened from Jacob and then Paul shows up and he acts all pissed off. Just wanted to see if you needed a friend is all. I'm glad I did though."_

"_Thank you Embry. Really thank you. Although I must say you were so persistent it almost seems like your kidnapping me." _Embry and I both laugh, which helps ease the tension.

"_Sorry It's just I've been wanting a vacation for so long but didn't want to go on my own. So when I saw what you were doing I just jumped to the chance."_

"_Think they'll be mad? I mean we at least left a note/call. "_

"_Doesn't matter, Jacob will lose his mind, Sam will be beyond pissed but he's alpha so he can't leave La Push. Paul will try to track us down so he can rip me a new one. And Emily will be disappointed which is worse than all the others. "_

"_I don't think Paul will be tracking us down, I'm leaving mostly to get….space. Having second thoughts?"_

"_No I'm all in. I've never left La Push territory. I need this."_

"_Why do you need this? What's going on Embry?" _I reach over and touch his arm, letting him know that I'm here for him. He turns to look at me and smiles. _Always smiling. _

"_Later okay?"_

"_Okay." _We are silent for a while just letting the music break the silence. I watch out the window and I notice that were already going through Forks. I notice that Embry starts to drive a little faster, I look over to ask him to be careful, but then I notice the time 11:10pm. The bonfire is over. _Oh no.. I'm not ready for this. I mean they –_

"_Hey! Can't they just trace our scent? I'm sure they could just track us faster than we've been driving!"_

"_Yea they could track us, but our scents are going to be fading. Since our main target is vampires they aren't going to able to focus. I think they can follow our scent as far as I would say Port Angeles." _

"_Port Angeles? Embry we just passed the leaving Forks sign! This was a mistake they are going to catch up to us and we'll be in even bigger trouble!" _I start to panic I figured that if we were gone a couple of days then they could use that time to calm down.

"_CALM DOWN KASSANDRA!" _Embry yelling at me makes me freeze.

"_I need us to focus okay? I'm going to get us into Port Angeles before they even reach home don't forget they do have to clean up the beach." _ Embry accelerates and I can hear my car make a weird sound.

"_It's just the engine it's okay. Just not use to reaching this speed." _

"_I think you might break the record Paul set in reaching Port Angeles. This is where I'm glad you're a werewolf."_

"_Shape shifter."_

"_Oh I'm sorry that's right your shape shifters" _Sarcasm is coating my words, I know how sensitive some of the guys are about that.

"_I can't believe we are actually doing this. I mean this is just wow, you know? Don't you have a little bit of adrenaline in you?"_

"_I'm starting to yea. I think it's the fact that I know that any minute they are going to get that note. I'm running on scared adrenaline."_

"_Oh live a little would ya!"_

"_Hey! I resent that I'm here aren't I? I haven't made you turn around have I? Noooo!" _

"_I mean you keep complaining I just wish you would let go." _

"_Where is this new Embry coming from by the way? I've never seen you like this and I've known you all my life."_

"_I've always been like this it's just now being a wolf makes me feel exhilarated, plus since you and Jacob have had awkwardness you haven't been able to see me change."_

"_Promise me you're going to talk to me on this little adventure of ours." _

"_Only if you promise me that you will stop complaining and just let go" _

"_I promise"_

"_Then I promise."_

I start to relax a bit knowing that I'm at least not alone and that this will be fun. Embry starts singing along at the top of his lungs completely off key. I laugh at him and decide that if he's going to have fun on this trip than so am I. I turn up the song "Beast and the Harlot" and start singing together, while laughing our asses off. _Maybe this isn't such a bad idea. _

"_WE'RE IN PORT ANGELES!" _

I look around but all I see is the sign telling us 10 more miles till Port Angeles.

"_Not yet dufus" _

"_I know but we are close!" _Embry has the biggest smile on his face.

"_I'm amazed that you were able to drive this fast without any cops noticing. How did you manage that I mean this road is crawling with cops at night."_

"_That's for me to know and for you to never ever find out."_

"_Never ever is a long time. Why can't you tell me?"_

"_It's a wolf thing."_

"_Oh sure that's always the excuse." _I let a smile grace my lips letting him know I'm just giving him hell.

We continue to drive and sing along adding dance moves now. I keep my eye out for the sign saying Welcome to Port Angeles. Another 8 minutes and I see that beautiful sign. _No turning back now. _I hear Embry let out a howl and I decide to join in. When we stop the CD is over so it's starting over, which makes it quiet and that's when we hear it, the sound of buzzing. The sound of a phone vibrating. The sound of my phone vibrating. Embry and I share a look before I finally pull my phone out. Home. _Home. _

"_You going to answer it? Or piss them off even more by ignoring it?"_

"_Why can't you talk you're the brave one." _I try to shove my phone over to him but he resists.

"_Well honestly I don't know if Sam can go all alpha commander on me over the phone and it work or not." _

"_Oh." _Suddenly the phone stops vibrating. _Shit. _

"_Call them back, Call them back. The longer you stall the more time Sam has to go round up the pack." _

I quickly hit redial but put in on speaker phone.

"_Kass what did I just sa-"_

"_Shh, I won't let them know it's on speaker. So he can't directly command-"_

"_Hello? Charlie?" _ A frantic teary sounding voice answers the phone.

"_Emmy? Emily it's me." _I look over to Embry and I mouth a silent question "_Chief Charlie Swan?" _My eyes I'm sure are as wide as saucers.

"_Kassandra? Oh my-" _Emily's voice is cut off and I hear the phone shuffle.

"_Kassandra Jolene Sage! You get your ass home back right now. Do you hear me? How can you take off like that? Huh? Have you gone completely mental. We are worried sick yet you're running out there being selfish, not thinking how this will affect us. And you're alone? God!" _Sam doesn't sound too happy at the moment.

"_You didn't write that you were going with me?" _I look over to Embry and he just shrugs.

"_Someone's with you? Who the fuck is with you?"_

"_It's Embry. We aren't coming back I'll call everyday but we both just want to be gone for a few days. Don't worry I'm safe with Embry."_

"_Embry? Of all people you went with Embry? Seriously taking off with now another pack member, what has gotten into you? You making a list?"_

"_Low blow Sam, low fucking blow." _With that I hang up the phone putting it completely on silent. I look down at the phone in my hands and start to sob. _He's basically calling me a slut._

I feel Embry reach over and grab my hand before squeezing it than letting go.

"_I'm here okay. You're safe. Don't listen to Sam his temper is worse than Paul's when he's set off."_

"_It still hurts, he called me a slut. Did I deserve that?"_

"_I know. You're not a slut, nowhere even close. In fact you can't even see the word."_

I let out a sigh before looking out the window just watching the trees blur by.

"_So East?"_

"_Yea East."_

I throw my phone on the floor before pulling my legs onto the seat with me, curled up. I hear Embry put music back on. _Everything will be okay. _

* * *

><p><em>Hey Everyone!<br>_

_Soooo did you expect Embry? Did I make a good choice? I feel like he never got to have a story line, so I thought I'd do something for him. I know they're crazy for leaving I mean HELLO you have people there but don't worry I have a plan, it'll be good...I think. I hope you all can understand them running, I'm sure most of us have thought of being spontaneous like them._

_Thanks for all the reviews, favorites and follows. Leave me feedback! The good and the bad please._

**_I don't own anything related to Twilight is all Stephanie Myer_**

_xoxo_


	15. Hotel

**Hotel. **

Embry and I sit in silence for a while. I can't help but think on what Sam said. I feel like it's so out of line for him_. I mean Paul and I have…had….have something. Then there's all the Jacob drama. However with Embry there's just friendship… two friends running from their problems. _I let out a sigh at that thought.

"_How much longer are we going to drive?" _I turn to look at Embry, trying to see if he's tired.

"_I don't know I don't' mind driving for a while longer."_

"_Okay…so where is our destination?"_

"_I don't know I've always wanted to see the east coast." _I start laughing at that because he's gotta be joking but when I look at him and he just stares at me with a serious expression I stop.

"_Wait y-y-you're not serious?"_

"_Well yea I mean why not?"_

"_Umm the east coast is across the country! It'd take like a week to get there. I thought you meant to the edge of Washington."_

"_Actually it only takes about 3 ½ days but with me driving it could take hmmm maybe 2."_

"_Yea that's if you drive straight through… you can't do that"_

"_Who says?"_

"_I do. We're going on this little adventure for an escape not death."_

"_Kass, Sam has us pull all nighters all the time I can handle it" _

I think about what Embry's saying because I know it's true. _It's logical but it's not fair of me to let Embry drive all night with no brake. _

"_Embry let's just stop at a hotel or something. We have time and I have money. Really I would prefer if we just stopped somewhere tonight."_

"_How about this I'll drive to the border of Idaho and Montana, then you can take over. We'll get breakfast get gas….actually we'll need to stop soon for gas. Then I'll rest why you drive." _

"_Not possible. Embry we don't even have a map! We don't know anything about how to get out of the state. So please let's find a hotel and get some damn rest."_

Embry doesn't answer me but I continue to stare at his profile. I see Embry glance at me out of the corner of his eye and I let the corner of my mouth lift into a smile. _Eventually he'll become uncomfortable and cave in. just a few more-_

"_Okay Okay we'll stop at a hotel for the night just stop staring at me" _I give Embry a full smile.

"_Next sign for a hotel you pull over got it?"_

"_Got it." _

Both Embry and I continue to keep our eyes peeled out for a hotel that we could stop at. We drive for a few more miles before I spot a sign advertising the Holiday Inn. Embry takes the exit and we pull up to the hotel. _It's pretty much empty and there are only two other cars here. _

"_Embry... maybe-" _I move my eyes to the driver's seat but there is no Embry. I hear the trunk shut loudly. _How the _hell_ do they do that, they're like 300 pound ninjas. _

I get out of the car, grabbing my purse and cell phone, then immediately run to Embry's side, I hear him lock the car before putting the key's in his pocket. I grab his arm and look around me still a little freaked out,

"_You're okay." _Embry gives me a reassuring glance.

"_Yea thanks"_

Embry and I walk through the sliding doors into the lobby. I glance to the left and notice the front desk where a middle aged woman is standing with this huge smile on her face. I stop in my track but Embry keeps walking so that causes me to stumble before I follow him.

"_Hello Welcome to the Holiday Inn. How can I help you tonight?"_

"_We'll need two rooms-"_

"_No one room it's cheaper. One room for one night please." _Embry cuts me off, being the logical one of us two.

"_Okay and would you like two singles or one queen?" _She looks up at us with an annoyingly cheery smile.

"_A queen will do. Thank you." _This time I'm the one that's logical.

"_Alrighty. That'll be-" _

"_Here just put it on this card." _ I don't wanna know how much will be coming out of my parent's money. _I'll deal with it later._

"_It'll be-"_

"_I don't care how much it is just put it on the card. Please."_

The lady looks at us strangely before she tells us she'll be right back and she disappears through the door behind the desk.

Embry and I look at each other with worried glances.

"_Did you have to speak like that? Now she's going to be suspicious." _

"_Oh relax. We'll be fine. When did we switch roles I thought I was the nervous nelly. "_

"_I'm not nervous. I just don't want to get caught."_

"_Stop speaking through your teeth makes you sound angry and like your hiding something."_

"_We are hiding something Kass, neither of us is-"_

"_You look like your 25. I'm almost 18. Plus we aren't hiding money from a bank job are we? No. So just chill please. Before I get-"_

"_Sorry about that, just had to grab paper for the printer." _The cheery lady holds up a pile of paper, before she sets to work on using the computer and booking us our room. I look over at Embry and give him a smirk, to which he responds with a mischievous smile. _That oddly doesn't look out of place on his sweet face. _

Embry and I stand there waiting while the lady takes her sweet time. It's at this time that I notice Embry grabbed both of our suitcases.

"_Okay here is your card and key you'll be in room are just through there on your right. We do have a complementary buffet in the morning from 7:00 to 9:00 and check out is at noon. Other than that you're good to go. Have a great evening." _

"_Great thank you so much." _I give the lady a smile before turning around.

"_My pleasure."_

Embry and I pick up our bags and walk over to elevators. I keep glancing at Embry and I can see him trying to glance at everything and it looks like he's trying to make sure his surroundings are safe.

"_I'm pretty sure there aren't any vampires here" _I didn't bother to whisper because there is no one else in the lobby and the front desk is around the corner on the other side of the lobby.

"_Shhh Kassie." _

"_What no one can hear me."_

"_You don't know someone could be-"_

"_What a fly on the wall." _

"_Just shut it till we aren't out in the open."_

"_Sure sure"_

I hear Embry let out a breathy chuckle and I look at him with confusion. He's biting his lip trying to keep his smile at bay.

"_What?"_

Embry looked over at me and realized that I heard him.

"_Nothing just remembered something."_

"_Bull what is it?"_

Embry lets his eye drop and the smile is wiped from his face immediately. Now I'm beginning to get concerned. _Did I say something? Is he regretting this-"_

"_It's just you stole Jake's line"_

We hear the ding of the elevator and I wait for us to step through the doors once they opened and closed before I reply.

"_Oh. Yea I guess"_

I keep my eyes on the closed doors and see the motion of Embry pressing the three button.

"_Look I'm sorry I didn't mean to bring him up."_

"_No it's fine. I didn't ask you to not mention him."_

"_Still I thought we had at least some silent agreement."_

"_It's fine, it doesn't bother me , it shouldn't."_

The elevator dings again and the doors open. Once Embry and I get out we look at the sign that tells us our room is to the right. I look at Embry as we walk down the hall, his posture is hunched and yet head still skims the ceiling. Now it's my turn to laugh.

"_What?"_

"_You look so awkward." _I start to laugh more but I try to keep it quiet.

"_It's not my fault the Holiday Inn isn't aware of a shape shifters height and they don't take that into account when it comes to these damn ceilings." _

Embry and I reach our room and I slide our key in before we step through the door.

"_It's a shame not more people know about the shape shifting I'm sure once some teeny boppers saw you and the boys they'd stalk you and we would all be famous." _

After finishing that sentence I flop on to the bed and let my bag drop to the floor.

"_Yea, just what we need."_

"_I was kidding."_

"_I know, just saying. I'll take the floor."_

"_No not fair the floor is uncomfortable just share the bed."_

Embry looks over at me with shock. I let out a sigh before looking to the ceiling.

"_Maybe Sam was right. God I'm an idiot." _I cover my face with my hands and let out a sarcastic laugh.

"_No. Sam's an idiot."_

"_The way you just looked at me though-"_

"_I was just going through all the ways that Jacob, Paul or Sam could kill me."_

I take my hands away from my face before sitting up and patting the space next to me. Embry walks over and sits next me.

"_They wouldn't kill you. Your Embry Call everyone loves you. You're too sweet."_

"_Not as sweet as Seth."_

"_That's not fair Seth is a whole different level of his own. I mean the kid-" _

I'm cut off by the sound of my cellphone going off again. I move back to look at the floor where my purse is laying…with the damn cell phone in it. I reach into my purse and I grab for the ringing phone. _Paul. _

"_You going to answer that one?"_

Without answering I get up and walk towards the bathroom while answering the phone. I don't say anything even though the call is connected. _What can I say? _ I close the bathroom door and sit on the toilet seat.

"_Paul…?"_

I don't get an answer but I know he's there I can hear his breathing.

"_Paul….. can you answer me?"_

Nothing just breathing. _Fine if that's the way he's gonna be. _

"_Fine don't answer. I'm just gonna say it, yes I'm gone and yes I'm with Embry. Nothing is going on plus you're the one who said space was needed. So you wanted space here it is, probably not how you imagined it but whatever. I won't bother you. This isn't to punish you for needing space though you were right I need this too. I'll see you when I get back…..Maybe"_

I close the phone and continue to sit on the toilet. I bring the hand holding my cell phone up to my lips and start biting my nails. I stare off into space and I can feel tears stinging my eyes. I don't know how long I sit there until I hear knocking on the door and Embry's voice. I don't answer I just sit there, I can hear Embry open the door and I see him squat in front of me. He puts his hand on my shoulder and continues to stare at me.

"_What did I do in a past life to deserve this?"_

Embry doesn't answer me obviously sensing that what I just said was not a real question. I bring my gaze to meet his and I lay my phone in my lap.

"_I just don't get it. I've lost my parents. My dad's dead, my mom is god knows where. I've been raped and had a miscarriage. Jacob is tied to me by an imprint and that's the only thing keeping him around me. Paul, who seems to be the only guy that actually cares about me want's space. Sam's pissed and thinks I'm some sort of whore going through his pack of hormonal wolves. And Emily… I don't know about Emily she loves me I know but how does she feel about us running off. I just don't get this Embry, I don't."_

Embry doesn't say anything he just squeezes my shoulder. Before bringing me into his arms where I let out a weak sob. I stay there clutching him just enjoying the comfort with all my emotions going haywire. I pull back and start to wipe my eyes even though no tears fell.

"_No you know what. Fuck this I've gone through much worse than a few boy problems. I can't keep wallowing in my grief. Let's go to bed and tomorrow morning we drive to the east coast away from all this bull shit."_

I stand up making Embry stand too before I smile at him and leave the bathroom. I walk over to the window side of the bed and kick off my shoes. I look at my cell phone and turn it off, before placing it on the nightstand. I don't spare it a second glance; instead I pull back the comforter and sheets. I look at the clock on the night stand 1:45. _Huh. _

"_Stay on your side of the bed Call."_

I sit down on the bed and finally turn to lie on my back. I feel Embry slip in beside me, and immediately I can feel the heat from his body. _Okay forget the sheets at all. _

"_Oh don't worry I will. You stink."_

I turn over to look at him with an astounded expression and my mouth hanging open. Embry looks over at me seriously before finally laughing.

"_Get some sleep Sage. Tomorrow we start our long vacation." _

With that Embry turns to face the other side.

"_Hmmm. I think it's more of an adventure."_

The only response I get is Embry's loud snores. _God he's worse than Paul. _I think flipping over onto my side while letting out a small chuckle.

* * *

><p><em>So what do you think of their friendship? What do you think of Paul calling but not talking?<em>

_I'm sure some are like how can she afford this at 18, but she has access to the money her dad left for her as well as her mother, otherwise yes most 18 year old's couldn't afford this, I do realize this. _

_Thank you to everyone who reads this story and of course to my lovely commenters, favorites and followers!_

**_I do not own anything Twilight!_**

_xoxo _


	16. Road Trip

**Road Trip **

The next morning I wake up around 8:45. I turn my head to look to beside me and I see Embry's form lying on the other side. _I'll wake him up later._

I move to get out of bed but I don't bother to be silent because honestly the boys can sleep through anything. I stop over at my suitcase to gather new clothes and it's only then that I realize I didn't pack any make up or face wash or shampoo. _Great._

I continued to the bathroom and did my normal routine. I turned the shower nob to hot and started to undress as steam finally filled the bathroom. I stepped into the shower and let the hot water beat on my back. I continued on with the normal shower routine, while thinking about last night.

_It's embarrassing how I can just break down after having a conversation…if you could even call it that… it's more embarrassing that before all this imprinting bullshit I use to be emotionally put together and…well normal. I never let some guy get to me like that….not even Jacob. _

I stepped out of the shower after washing my hair and body. I dried off and put my clothes back on while I let my hair out of the towel and just let it dry naturally. I go over to the sink and turn it on as I reach for a toothbrush I realize that's one of the necessities that I didn't pack. _Oh please let me have gum in my purse. _

I walk back out to the main room and see that Embry is starting to stir. Deciding to have some fun I run over jump on the bed, jump over him onto the floor and fling the curtains open letting in the bright beautiful morning sun!

"_TA-DA!"_

"_Oh come on Kass, let me go back to bed" _

I let my arms fall to rest on my hips and purse my lips. I let my mind gears go to work trying to think of a way to get this show on- _oh. _ Letting my arms fall back to my side I watch as Embry buries his head under his pillows. I let out a deep sigh.

"_Alright well you sleep in. After you wake up come join me downstairs for the complementary all you can eat-"_

"_I'm up, I'm up" _Embry pops his head back out. I let myself give a few claps for my success.

"_I'll go get us a table!" _ I start making my way to the door and swiping up my purse making sure to get the room key.

"_Yeah, yeah."_

"_Hurry, hurry." _

After making it down the dining hall, there are only two tables filled and the rest are empty. I move over to the buffet and grab myself some eggs and bacon with a bagel. I move over to a table that's in the corner trying to get some privacy. I don't have to wait too long before hearing the ding of the elevator and seeing Embry's form walking fast paced to the buffet. We end up eating breakfast in silence, before heading up stairs crabbing our stuff and checking out. In the car we get back on the highway and just head east.

"_So where should we go?"_

"_Well we decided the east coast, what is there on the east coast?"_

"_Well we have New York"_

"…_Nah"_

"_Umm there's DC the capital of the USA"_

"_Maybe"_

"_Okay well let's see the Outer Banks?"_

"_Nope."_

"_Well and of course the most amazing place on planet earth"_

"_What's that ?"_

"_ORRRLAAANDOOO FLORDIA!"_

"_Why's that the best place on planet earth?"_

"_Uhhh Disney World, Universal!"_

"_Oh."_

"_What?"_

"_I didn't know that's where it all was."_

"_Have you never been? Not even as a child?"_

"_Nah, my mom didn't have the time to take me."_

"_Oh I see."_

We fall into a little bit of an awkward silence for a few minutes. I'm more focused on the way Embry said the words, filled with such hurt.

"_I've been there once the year before my dad passed away, we went as a family. I just remember being such a brat because I was 14 and stupid; I didn't appreciate what I had. However I do remember how beautiful it was. Disneyworld is magical I mean for any girl it's a symbol that gives us hope for our prince charming. Universal was fun with all the rides and everything. If I could pick a time to go back with my family it would be that, and I would do it all over again but I'd actually embrace it, never let go of my parents."_

Embry and I fall into another round of silence, I think I threw him off with that emotional load, but I wanted something else to distract him from what he said about his mom. _Why did he look so broken? _

"_Well then we're going to need a map to Florida."_

"_What?"_

"_Let's go to Disney, and even though it won't be your mom and dad, you can have that chance of embracing it in their memory. I've never been either so it sounds great. "_

I start to tear up because of what Embry just did for me. My parents are always a sore subject but this time it's not sadness its gratitude I'm feeling.

"_Thank you Embry."_

"_Of course. Now let's pull over and see if they have a map anywhere."_

Once Embry and I pull over and find a map, we start routing our trip while we stop for food as well. Then we are off on our great adventure. I finally got Embry to let me drive a little so he could get some sleep. He convinced me to drive straight through we already are almost done with day one, it's 2 days no stopping so he figures if we route driving that at least eliminates stopping for a hotel. I look over at Embry feeling bad that my car is so cramped for him to sleep, I know it's uncomfortable. With him asleep he leaves me to my thoughts.

_Alright Kass this is it take control of your life again. Emily has already told you not to let those two men to overcome me but I did let them. I need to establish boundaries, no more of this girl that I've been the last few months. I need to stop being so emotional, I know I had the rape and miscarriage but as I've figured out life is going to keep moving whether I want it to or not. When we get back I'm talking to my psychologist and then I'm focusing on school, that's it no more depending on Paul or Jacob. You can do this Kass, you need this vacation. Everything will-_

"_Whatcha thinking about?" _

I look over and see Embry's adjusting the seat to sit up.

"_Hey you're supposed to be asleep."_

"_I got like 4 hours. It's already 5."_

I look at the clock on the dashboard and sure enough I had been driving for 4 hours.

"_We can pull over and switch the next place we see."_

"_No I'm okay to drive a little more you need some rest."_

Embry looks through my CDs to find music and finally chooses a mix one that I made a long time ago. I let the music wash over me feeling comfortable with no conversation. We drive for a few more hours, stopping for gas and just talking here and there. I start to feel a little tired so I ask if Embry's okay to take the wheel. When I get confirmation I pull over at the next exit and we switch. _I didn't realize how comfortable it would be not having a steering wheel right in front of me. _

"_Should we call them?_

"_I don't know what do you think?"_

"_I'm thinking maybe we should check in let them know we're safe."_

"_Sam's just going to yell at me some more"_

"_Better to face it now over the phone."_

"_You don't think I should let it be for one more day?"_

"_Nah if anything that'll jut make him more upset."_

"_Alright I'll call them."_

I look back out the front windshield and cross my arms. Chewing the inside of my cheeks while I try to contain my nerves.

"_You calling them?"_

"_What now?"_

"_Yea it's pretty late" _

"_Oh alright."_

I get my phone out and see that the battery has hardly drained considering I haven't really used it yet. I unlock it and then just start scrolling up and down the contacts trying to gain some nerve. _Take control Kass_.

I land on the house phone number, select it than press it to my ear listening to the ringing. _Don't answer, don't answer, don't-_

"_Hello?"_

"_Kim?"_

"_OH MY GOSH KASS! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU WE'VE BEEN FREAKING OUT! Your frekaing crazy for doing what you did. I can't believe that not only did you leave you didn't even say goodbye to me, your best friend. I -"_

"_Kassandra?"_

"_Emily."_

It's quiet for a tic and I can feel my heart constricting.

"_How are you? How's Embry?"_

"_We're good, really good. How's everyone?"_

"_Good good, we're all here eating our usual dinner…together."_

"_That sounds nice."_

"_When are you coming home honey?"_

"_I don't know a few days, a week?"_

"_A WEEK?" _I can hear mumbling start in the background at her saying that

"_Maybe! It could be way less."_

"_Where are you?"_

"_Umm not sure"I look over to the driver's seat" hey Em where are we?_

"_I think along the border of Montana and Idaho."_

"_WHAT? You're that far away?"_

"_Yes Emmy I told you I need this, we both need this."_

"_Please just come home, Please Kass."_

"_I'm sorry I can't."_

It's quiet on her end but I hear a little movement on her end I can distinctly make out Jacobs voice.

"_Hey sorry Bells and I are late lost track of time….woah why's everyone looking lik-"_

_Don't please no one tell him that I'm on the phone, I don't want to hear his voice…well directly._

"_It's Kassie, she's talking to Em." _Sam's voice is louder than Jacobs so I assume he's closer to the phone. Everything 's quiet again.

"_I should probably go."_

"_No, no Kassie please talk to me a little more, please see reason and come home."_

"_Emmy I am seeing reason I think I'm seeing this clearer than any of you. I'm almost a legal adult I can go where I want."_

"_Sweetie I know you are but Embry's not and he left his brothers."_

"_That was his doing not mine, I guess be happy he's here otherwise I'd be all alone on this road trip adventure."_

"_I wish this "road trip adventure" wasn't even happening"_

"_Emmy I'll be home in a few days safe and sound, but I really should be going my...uh phones about to die."_

"_Okay, okay alright I miss you so much and I love you. I think I can speak for the rest of the pack on that as well" _I hear a snort in the back ground obviously loud so I would hear it.

"_I love and miss you too…all of you and I know I speak for Embry on that. I'll call you tomo-"_

"_Wait, wait hold on" _I hear a little shuffle going on

"_Emmy?"_

"_It's not Emily"_

"_Jacob, Hi"_

"_Yea. Hey put Embry on. "_

"_Okay."_

I hand the phone over to Embry and I watch him while he converses with Jacob. I can't really get enough info in between the one worded convo Em's having. _Yes, no, okay , yea I can do that…blah blah blah just give me more than that. _

Next thing I know is that Embry's handing the phone back to me. I see that it's still connected.

"_Hey again."_

"_You know when I said we'd do things your way, and that I'd see you later… this isn't what I had in mind."_

"_Me either. It was spur of the moment. Are you mad?"_

"_Oh beyond mad, all of us are, this was so wrong of you on so many different levels I can't even think straight." _

"_I'm sorry."_

"_Yea you should be…just come home safe."_

"_Okay" _

And with that last word Jacob hangs up on me. I slowly bring my arms down to rest on my lap staring at the phone.

"_Their being overly harsh only because they love you."_

"_What'd Jacob say?"_

"_It wasn't just Jacob who I talked to I talked to them all. With them telling me the basics about protecting you. "_

"_You talked to all of them? None of them wanted to speak to me."_

"_Well they are a lot more upset with you."_

"_But why?"_

"_Because your Kassandra you have everyone in the pack wrapped around your finger, and they all love you to death. You are an amazing person, who has been through so much recently that you can't blame them for being scared. And you're human you are much more fragile than me."_

"_Thank you. Hopefully they will forgive me."_

"_They will. Just give it time."_

I just nod and continue to stare out the window before slowly letting the temptation of sleep take over. I wake up again once Embry pulls over for more gas, it's dark out now and there is hardly anyone at the gas station.

"_I'm gonna run in do you want anything?"_

"_No thanks I'm good." _

"_Okay."_

I go ahead and stretch my legs waiting for him to come back. I'm still pretty tired so I start to zone out just watching the numbers on the pump watching as it reaches higher and higher.

"_Hey."_

I turn around with a little jump putting my hand over my heart when I see it's just Embry.

"_Jeeze you scared me."_

"_Sorry"_

I look and see that he's holding some red bull and monster in his arms, as well as lots of junk food.

"_Do you want me to drive again?"_

"_Nah I'm good I just needed some stuff to fill my stomach, you go ahead and rest some more."_

"_Are you sure? I really don't mind driving."_

"_Yea, you look like you need it more than me."_

"_Oh thanks."_

"_You know what I mean."_

I let a little laugh out, once I hear the pump start I take the stuff from Embry and get in the car so he can dislodge the pump and everything.

"_So when we get there we'll get a hotel and both of us can sleep before going to the parks!" _

"_Yea sounds good, I'll pay for the room this time."_

"_What no. It's fine I got it."_

"_No really my mom leaves me a credit card for emergencies."_

"_This counts as an emergency?"_

"_Of course!"_

"_Alright whatever you say, how bout we split though that way we can get our own beds"_

"_That works for me. Now you get some rest, leave the energy drinks in reaching distance."_

"_Okay, just wake me up when you want to switch."_

"_Okay."_

After getting everything settled, I settle myself down trying to get comfortable, before finally closing my eyes, once more.

* * *

><p><em>I am so sorry everyone, I totally writers blocked with the story. I had a LOT going on but now that things have settled I should be updating much more often! Promise.<em>

_Also I went over this story and decided their were definitely some things that needed to be edited, so previous chapters might have slight changes, scenes added and much better spelling and grammar (I hope!) in case you are interested!  
><em>

_**I don't own Twilight or any rights to it that is all Stephanie Myer.**_

_Would anyone like to maybe make me a story cover? I'd really appreciate it I'm so bad with editing stuff like that.  
><em>

_Please review I love to hear peoples thoughts on my story, especially this chapter because I feel a little rusty jumping back in! I hope you like this one though. Enjoy!_

_xoxo_


End file.
